She's making me go to the beach this weekend with her and my friend Mark. That's boring enough. Our relationship sucks anyway, so it's not going to be all that fun. It's kind of hard to explain my mother, so I'm not even going to try. I don't have that much time before we leave.
This morning, we had to go pick up a table that she inherrited from her grandparents when they died. Because of family problems, she didn't want to go back to their house and confront the family members who played their games and pulled sh!t that helped to ruin the family to begin with. That was years ago. She came to me and asked what to do about having to go back because she said she "just can't go." I understood, but me, being the hard-ass bastard that I am, told her my opinion like she was asking me to.
I said "I don't understand why you can't just go get it. That was years ago."
She was like "I just can't." More like she's not confronting her issues, but that's another deal. She asked me what she should do, and I told her to "suck it up and just go out there to get the table." It's not like she had to stay long or anything. Just long enough to get the table into the back of the truck, and drive off back home. No big deal. How does she respond?
She starts yelling "YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND! I JUST CAN'T!" and she started crying. That's all she could say. We both have a short fuse when it comes to eachother, so I felt incredibly annoyed with someone who couldn't be mature about something for *a few minutes*. I just said "okay" and walked away into the kitchen to get something to eat before retiring to my room and that was that for the night.
The next morning, she decided that she'd go out. I was proud of her.
When we got there, she was like "no, I can't do it" and just stood with her arms folded standing at the truck looking away from the house, sniffling and ignoring what anyone said to her unless we got in front of her and made her listen. I was like "just come help with the table and we can leave."
She started off again with "YOU DON'T KNOW! YOU'RE ONLY THINKING ABOUT YOURSELF! THAT'S ALL YOU THINK ABOUT IS YOURSELF AND YOU ONLY DISRESPECT ME!" and all this jazz about not honoring her and making her angry and not respecting her. To tell you the truth, I try, but it's hard at times to respect someone who does not understand what "respect" means and doesn't respect you to begin with.
So the whole way home, she bitched at me about my being an asshole and how she can't take it anymore. The feelings of the passed mixed with going back to the house were adding together and overtaking her. I understand that, but it doesn't mean that I'm going to let her walk all over me.
I just sat listening to her. When we got home, she started in with her retarded ideas about how to get it in the house and how to move the current table. None of them worked, and I knew they wouldn't. Her ideas rarely do. But, her being "the parent" is always correct, right? :|
I ended up saying things extremely softly and kindly like "yes, I know I have to take the table apart; that's why I'm going to get my tools." What was her reply?
"THAT'S ENOUGH! I WON'T TAKE YOUR MOUTH! STOP TALKING BACK TO ME OR YOU'RE GOING TO GET IT, BUSTER!"
Then, when I had to call Mark to tell him when we'd pick him up tonight, for the trip to the beach, she was like "make sure to tell him that he needs to back his bathroom supplies, some spending money, extra clothes in case he gets wet" etc. I said "I'll tell him about the money, but he's a big boy and can figure out what he needs."
She went nuts over that too. Every little thing I do, she completely flips out. I was talking to 1967mustangman on the phone when she told me the thing about Mark. She was talking softly, surprisingly, but 1967MM knew. I think he's seen her bad side. She seems to be nice until you say something that flips her out and then she goes fsckin' nuts on me.
1967MM wanted to pick me up and do something before work tonight, then drop me off at work. The plan was to have her and Mark pick me after I get off and we can be off to the beach after that. She seemed to be in a good mood again, so I tolder her about 1967MM's offer. She started going off on how he should have planned earlier, started yelling louder and louder again, ran out of the house off to take some things to the cleaners at the last minute, slamming doors and I haven't heard from her since.
Hmm... sounds familiar. I guess I'm more like her than I realize. :|
:|:|:|
:| :| :|
Damn it. Her attitude and my fear of being the same way make me want to never have children. She said that she'd never be like her mother to her children, but now she is. I said the same thing when I'm younger, but I already see the beginnings of it. @$(&%!
:|
So here's what I have ahead of me:
A sh!tty weekend with the someone who likes to be angry for no reason (atleast I have reasons)
Who knows.... maybe I'll get lucky and the end of the world will happen or I'll just get up the brass to just fsck her off and find a job that will let me get my own goddamn appartment. Maybe 1967mustangman and Viper GTS will rent with me... I'm pretty sure they would, but who knows.
True, she may be my mother, but that doesn't give her the right to treat me like this. I mean, she's treating me how she thinks I treat her. Compared to this, I treat her like a queen.
This morning, we had to go pick up a table that she inherrited from her grandparents when they died. Because of family problems, she didn't want to go back to their house and confront the family members who played their games and pulled sh!t that helped to ruin the family to begin with. That was years ago. She came to me and asked what to do about having to go back because she said she "just can't go." I understood, but me, being the hard-ass bastard that I am, told her my opinion like she was asking me to.
I said "I don't understand why you can't just go get it. That was years ago."
She was like "I just can't." More like she's not confronting her issues, but that's another deal. She asked me what she should do, and I told her to "suck it up and just go out there to get the table." It's not like she had to stay long or anything. Just long enough to get the table into the back of the truck, and drive off back home. No big deal. How does she respond?
She starts yelling "YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND! I JUST CAN'T!" and she started crying. That's all she could say. We both have a short fuse when it comes to eachother, so I felt incredibly annoyed with someone who couldn't be mature about something for *a few minutes*. I just said "okay" and walked away into the kitchen to get something to eat before retiring to my room and that was that for the night.
The next morning, she decided that she'd go out. I was proud of her.
When we got there, she was like "no, I can't do it" and just stood with her arms folded standing at the truck looking away from the house, sniffling and ignoring what anyone said to her unless we got in front of her and made her listen. I was like "just come help with the table and we can leave."She started off again with "YOU DON'T KNOW! YOU'RE ONLY THINKING ABOUT YOURSELF! THAT'S ALL YOU THINK ABOUT IS YOURSELF AND YOU ONLY DISRESPECT ME!" and all this jazz about not honoring her and making her angry and not respecting her. To tell you the truth, I try, but it's hard at times to respect someone who does not understand what "respect" means and doesn't respect you to begin with.
So the whole way home, she bitched at me about my being an asshole and how she can't take it anymore. The feelings of the passed mixed with going back to the house were adding together and overtaking her. I understand that, but it doesn't mean that I'm going to let her walk all over me.
I just sat listening to her. When we got home, she started in with her retarded ideas about how to get it in the house and how to move the current table. None of them worked, and I knew they wouldn't. Her ideas rarely do. But, her being "the parent" is always correct, right? :|
I ended up saying things extremely softly and kindly like "yes, I know I have to take the table apart; that's why I'm going to get my tools." What was her reply?
"THAT'S ENOUGH! I WON'T TAKE YOUR MOUTH! STOP TALKING BACK TO ME OR YOU'RE GOING TO GET IT, BUSTER!"
Then, when I had to call Mark to tell him when we'd pick him up tonight, for the trip to the beach, she was like "make sure to tell him that he needs to back his bathroom supplies, some spending money, extra clothes in case he gets wet" etc. I said "I'll tell him about the money, but he's a big boy and can figure out what he needs."
She went nuts over that too. Every little thing I do, she completely flips out. I was talking to 1967mustangman on the phone when she told me the thing about Mark. She was talking softly, surprisingly, but 1967MM knew. I think he's seen her bad side. She seems to be nice until you say something that flips her out and then she goes fsckin' nuts on me.
1967MM wanted to pick me up and do something before work tonight, then drop me off at work. The plan was to have her and Mark pick me after I get off and we can be off to the beach after that. She seemed to be in a good mood again, so I tolder her about 1967MM's offer. She started going off on how he should have planned earlier, started yelling louder and louder again, ran out of the house off to take some things to the cleaners at the last minute, slamming doors and I haven't heard from her since.
Hmm... sounds familiar. I guess I'm more like her than I realize. :|
:|:|:|
:| :| :|
Damn it. Her attitude and my fear of being the same way make me want to never have children. She said that she'd never be like her mother to her children, but now she is. I said the same thing when I'm younger, but I already see the beginnings of it. @$(&%!
:|
So here's what I have ahead of me:
A sh!tty weekend with the someone who likes to be angry for no reason (atleast I have reasons)
Who knows.... maybe I'll get lucky and the end of the world will happen or I'll just get up the brass to just fsck her off and find a job that will let me get my own goddamn appartment. Maybe 1967mustangman and Viper GTS will rent with me... I'm pretty sure they would, but who knows.
True, she may be my mother, but that doesn't give her the right to treat me like this. I mean, she's treating me how she thinks I treat her. Compared to this, I treat her like a queen.
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