Why does John Boehner cry so much?

[Narmer]

It wouldn't bother you if you weren't scared shitless of what YOU are feeling.

It's actually a sing of enormous strength and the fact that he's not yet totally emotionally dead.

People cry because they are pulled apart by competing emotions, like winning and feeling like they are the worst in the world. The good news triggers the feeling they don't deserve it so you get what are called tears of joy.

The truly emotionally dead, of course, just feel smug.

The American, he-man, silent suffering rock, is a mental disease that is killing the country. Please shut up with this shit about weakness. It is you who is sick, not he, not he so completely anyway. Get a therapist and find the loving Mother, Wife, Friend, Feminine Nature, you have buried inside yourself in a tomb of grief. Without her at your side you will never be your own friend.

From the womb to the tomb. It's ok to shed tears at those extremes. Do it often any other time and people will start to wonder about you. I know you're from San Francisco (which explains a lot) but even you have to understand that men are logical and women are emotional. If something happens to the President and Vice President, this crybaby would be the leader of the free world. Out enemies would become more embolden if they saw our President crying every other hour. It's sickening just thinking about it.

 

[Bird222]

Could say the same thing about you guys given the hate-fest. Hypocrite.

Fair enough. cheers.

 

[Carmen813]

He cries in the House. He cries on election night. He even cried yesterday on 60 Minutes. It really isn't appropriate for a leader, especially a man, to cry this often (even in public). It's a sign of weakness. The House Republicans should replace him ASAP.

I have no problem with him showing emotion. It isn't a sign of weakness. It isn't a sign of anything other than he cares about what he is doing. People who have a problem with it just show that they've internalized societal stereotypes against what men/women can and cannot do in public.

 

[Rockinacoustic]

I'd cry too if I had to lead the House.

 

[Narmer]

I have no problem with him showing emotion. It isn't a sign of weakness. It isn't a sign of anything other than he cares about what he is doing. People who have a problem with it just show that they've internalized societal stereotypes against what men/women can and cannot do in public.

Are you saying you have zero expectations for a man or woman?

 

[Carmen813]

Are you saying you have zero expectations for a man or woman?

I'm saying that jumping to the conclusion that a person is weak because they display emotion reveals more about the individual making that statement than it does about the person in question.

 

[Narmer]

I'm saying that jumping to the conclusion that a person is weak because they display emotion reveals more about the individual making that statement than it does about the person in question.

Of course it says a lot about me (and many other guys). Where I grew up we're not expected to display this type of emotion. It just isn't right. A man pouring his heart out instead of doing what he has to do says that his priorities aren't in order. This is doubly bad for a "leader". No guts, just raw emotion is unhealthy for men. A man's brain isn't wired for this. Is there something wrong with Boehner? Of course.
Does this make him an effective leader? Of course not.

 

[feralkid]

I'm saying that jumping to the conclusion that a person is weak because they display emotion reveals more about the individual making that statement than it does about the person in question.

Perhaps, but how many emotional breakdowns do you think we should endure from a public servant before we "jump to conclusions" good or bad?

 

[sandorski]

Stupid hurts.

 

[Sheik Yerbouti]

I think the spray tan keeps running into his eyes.

 

[Carmen813]

Of course it says a lot about me (and many other guys). Where I grew up we're not expected to display this type of emotion. It just isn't right. A man pouring his heart out instead of doing what he has to do says that his priorities aren't in order. This is doubly bad for a "leader". No guts, just raw emotion is unhealthy for men. A man's brain isn't wired for this. Is there something wrong with Boehner? Of course.
Does this make him an effective leader? Of course not.

Hence why I said that you've internalized societal stereotypes about appropriate behavior for men and women. That doesn't mean you get to perpetuate that stereotype without getting called out for it. Just because that's the way your world "is" doesn't mean it has to stay that way, and if you aren't working against those biases, than you are supporting them.

I've studied psychology and mental health issues extensively, and to be frank, you don't know what you are talking about. Displaying emotion is not unhealthy for men, in fact what the mental health professions considers unhealthy is ignoring your emotions entirely. It's denying a huge aspect of the self that separates humanity from other creatures, and emotions exist for healthy and adaptive reasons. A healthy balance of cognition and emotion is important for mental health. Further more, there is very little evidence to suggest that male and female brains are "wired" differently, and when that evidence does exist it has absolutely nothing to do with emotion.

You are also, coincidentally, pathologizing what you believe is stereotypically "normal" feminine behavior by making expressing emotion an "illness." Makes me wonder if you even believe women can be effective leaders.

 

[Carmen813]

Perhaps, but how many emotional breakdowns do you think we should endure from a public servant before we "jump to conclusions" good or bad?

I wonder what makes you think displaying emotion means a person is having an emotional breakdown. I wonder if you even know what an emotional breakdown is.

Let me put it another way: by classifying his behavior as an emotional breakdown, you are doing a disservice to the millions of people who have legitimate emotional problems.

 

[feralkid]

I wonder what makes you think displaying emotion means a person is having an emotional breakdown. I wonder if you even know what an emotional breakdown is.

Let me put it another way: by classifying he behavior as an emotional breakdown, you are doing a disservice to the millions of people who have legitimate emotional problems.

You're right...I'm worse than Hitler/Stalin/Mao.



But seriously, when pressure begins to overwhelm an individual to the point where their professional or personal well-being may be compromised ...that's a pretty good sign an emotional breakdown may be in the works.

 

[Carmen813]

You're right...I'm worse than Hitler/Stalin/Mao.

Oh I made that comparison?

It's a very simple concept. If people in our society keep labeling normal human behavior as pathological, than people who have legitimate mental problems are harmed. Their challenges lose recognition because these statements further societal stereotypes that mental illness isn't real, or can't be as debilitating, as physical illness. It's contributory negligence, and this type of behavior by "normal" people has done incredible harm to people who have mental illness.

*Edit*

But seriously, when pressure begins to overwhelm an individual to the point where their professional or personal well-being may be compromised ...that's a pretty good sign an emotional breakdown may be in the works.

I agree that if professional or personal well being is compromised the individual is probably being overwhelmed by their emotional experiences. In fact if those signs are readily apparent in public the problem has probably advanced farther than it could have been had it been treated earlier.

However, we're conflating the issue, because nothing Boehner has done suggests that this is even remotely the case. Frankly, since this is his "norm" going back for years, a sudden change in behavior where he stopped displaying emotion publicly would be more disconcerting. The only reason this thread even exists is because a male public leader displayed emotion, and the OP thinks that is a sign of weakness.

 

[feralkid]

Oh I made that comparison?

It's a very simple concept. If people in our society keep labeling normal human behavior as pathological, than people who have legitimate mental problems are harmed. Their challenges lose recognition because these statements further societal stereotypes that mental illness isn't real, or can't be as debilitating, as physical illness. It's contributory negligence, and this type of behavior by "normal" people has done incredible harm to people who have mental illness.

Sorry, Breaking down in tears at inapropriate moments is not really what anyone should be considering "normal".





It's not having emotion that's the issue, it's the lack of control over them.

Seriously, this person is about to be 3rd in line for leadership of the United States...This behaviour should raise more than a few eyebrows, should it not?

 

[Narmer]

Hence why I said that you've internalized societal stereotypes about appropriate behavior for men and women. That doesn't mean you get to perpetuate that stereotype without getting called out for it. Just because that's the way your world "is" doesn't mean it has to stay that way, and if you aren't working against those biases, than you are supporting them.

I've studied psychology and mental health issues extensively, and to be frank, you don't know what you are talking about. Displaying emotion is not unhealthy for men, in fact what the mental health professions considers unhealthy is ignoring your emotions entirely. It's denying a huge aspect of the self that separates humanity from other creatures, and emotions exist for healthy and adaptive reasons. A healthy balance of cognition and emotion is important for mental health. Further more, there is very little evidence to suggest that male and female brains are "wired" differently, and when that evidence does exist it has absolutely nothing to do with emotion.

You are also, coincidentally, pathologizing what you believe is stereotypically "normal" feminine behavior by making expressing emotion an "illness." Makes me wonder if you even believe women can be effective leaders.

lol. No one said he shouldn't cry. But to repeatedly do it in public is alien to me. Also, you made the fundamental mistake of changing the topic of what I was talking about (crying) to something broader (emotion). You may have studied psychology but you suck at debating. Stay on topic. Constantly crying in public is abnormal for a man.

 

[Carmen813]

Sorry, Breaking down in tears at inapropriate moments is not really what anyone should be considering "normal".

Don't be ridiculous. People cry for all sorts of reasons. People cry when angry, when sad, when laughing, when happy, when elated, when afraid, when they feel vindicated, or for just about any other emotion. Tears mean nothing if you don't understand the context of the persons experience.

 

[UberNeuman]

He never got over the sight of Augustus falling into the chocolate river and getting sucked up the pipe to the Fudge Room...

 

[Carmen813]

lol. No one said he shouldn't cry. But to repeatedly do it in public is alien to me. Also, you made the fundamental mistake of changing the topic of what I was talking about (crying) to something broader (emotion). You may have studied psychology but you suck at debating. Stay on topic. Constantly crying in public is abnormal for a man.

I disagree with the very foundation of your argument. Would you prefer group think?

Perhaps you need to re-read your own OP:

He cries in the House. He cries on election night. He even cried yesterday on 60 Minutes. It really isn't appropriate for a leader, especially a man, to cry this often (even in public). It's a sign of weakness. The House Republicans should replace him ASAP.

Excuse me, but I fail to see how anyone could read that post and not assume you were attacking the man for displaying emotion. As for sucking at debating, they have a term for individuals who begin attacking their opponent when they are on the "losing" side of an argument.

 

[feralkid]

Don't be ridiculous. People cry for all sorts of reasons. People cry when angry, when sad, when laughing, when happy, when elated, when afraid, when they feel vindicated, or for just about any other emotion. Tears mean nothing if you don't understand the context of the persons experience.

Ya think?
Try to understand the concept of "at inappropriate times".

 

[Carmen813]

Ya think?
Try to understand the concept of "at inappropriate times".

Consider the concept that for men in our society an "appropriate time" doesn't exist publicly. A situation occurs, he feels an emotion, he tears up. Nothing inappropriate about having genuine emotional reactions to situations, because wish it though people might, our leaders aren't robots. Frankly, I prefer it this way.

 

[Narmer]

I disagree with the very foundation of your argument. Would you prefer group think?

Perhaps you need to re-read your own OP:


Excuse me, but I fail to see how anyone could read that post and not assume you were attacking the man for displaying emotion.

I'm not attacking him for displaying emotion in general, I'm attacking him for overly displaying a particular emotion/act in public.

 

[Narmer]

Carmen, do you cry often in public?

 

[xenolith]

He should resign immediately.

You'd say that about anyone except for Karl Marx. I hate to break it to you but he's been dead since 1883. It's time to move on.

Of course it says a lot about me (and many other guys). Where I grew up we're not expected to display this type of emotion. It just isn't right. A man pouring his heart out instead of doing what he has to do says that his priorities aren't in order. This is doubly bad for a "leader". No guts, just raw emotion is unhealthy for men. A man's brain isn't wired for this. Is there something wrong with Boehner? Of course.
Does this make him an effective leader? Of course not.

You seem very settled on your opinion, so why ask such a rhetorical question in the OP? To elicit personal attacks at a man in a leadership role that cries too many times for your liking... maybe to sooth your own insecurities? Oh, I know, to try to change all our minds in a forum full of strong opposing opinions. hahahaha

I don't care very much for Boehner, but not because he cries too much... there are much bigger fish to fry then this "The View" emotional crap.

 

[feralkid]

Consider the concept that for men in our society an "appropriate time" doesn't exist publicly. A situation occurs, he feels an emotion, he tears up. Nothing inappropriate about having genuine emotional reactions to situations, because wish it though people might, our leaders aren't robots. Frankly, I prefer it this way.

You are correct, our leaders are not Robots; however the vast majority have a handle on controlling their emotions in public.


But seriously..when you say something like "There's nothing inappropriate about having genuine emotional reactions to situations" I think either you fail to understand the concept of "Situational Appropriateness" or you are just being obtuse.