who is he?

theMan

Diamond Member
Mar 17, 2005
4,386
0
0
The second thing he did was to go to the store and find an apple which was placed under the tree. There he was able to discover something no worse than the thought of going to town and eating his bill and finding a house of his own. When the world was out of touch with him, he was then finally able to spend the rest of the year working for his own estate and finally eating the wonderful apple pie his wife made.

Worst of all, he was undermined by his own brother when the pie competition came up short, and he had to go eat a cake with his father who was unable to eat the dog AND the pie and he said, well, if you don't get me a dog, i'm going to have to tell you to set up a grand old piano in the basement, and then walk to the store where they are made, and eat one of them for breakfast, which you love so much, but in the end will destroy you with its mighty power of joy, that wonderful sweetness which controls your soul and your ability to work with all those around you and find true happiness through love and stability in family, and self worth and everything else you seem to enjoy so much you lazy, worthless, good-for-nothing son of a bitch, thinking you're so smart, but you're not, and I'll kill you, really kill you, and you'll be dead, forever.

 

alfa147x

Lifer
Jul 14, 2005
29,307
106
106
The police often question him, just because they find him interesting.
He once punched a magician. That's right. You heard me.
When he orders a salad, he gets the dressing right there on top of the salad, where it belongs...where there is no turning back.
If a monument was built in his honor, Mt. Rushmore would close, due to poor attendance.

he is the most interesting man in the world
 

AstroManLuca

Lifer
Jun 24, 2004
15,628
5
81
i'll kill OP, really kill him, and he'll be dead forever

and everyone else in this thread will be happy
 

vshah

Lifer
Sep 20, 2003
19,003
24
81
he beats a turtle in a slowness contest, and a cheetah in a race?
if he was the hare, he would have won even after his nap.