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When someone says "no offense" or "nothing personal"..

S

Syringer

Lifer
So whenever someone prefaces something with "no offense" or something along those lines, it's usually because what they're about to say is offensive and they just want to find a nice way around it.

It's similar to "not to be a racist....but *insert racist remark here*".

 
When I don't mean to be personal, I ALWAYS say, "Please don't take this personally" as sincerely and genuinely as possible.

Also, when I want to interrupt somebody's conversation, I ALWAYS say, "I don't mean to interrupt, but I'm going to anyway." 🙂
 
i only say it to be sarcastic and that is the only way i've ever heard anyone use it
used seriously i think the second part would be what decides the offensiveness
 
Originally posted by: Syringer
So whenever someone prefaces something with "no offense" or something along those lines, it's usually because what they're about to say is offensive and they just want to find a nice way around it.

It's similar to "not to be a racist....but *insert racist remark here*".
Click to expand...
My philosophy teacher mused about this, to the effect of, "Did you ever notice that you can say something mean to someone, and say, 'just kidding,' but you still mean it? Isn't that great?"
😀
 
Originally posted by: Jeff7
Originally posted by: Syringer
So whenever someone prefaces something with "no offense" or something along those lines, it's usually because what they're about to say is offensive and they just want to find a nice way around it.

It's similar to "not to be a racist....but *insert racist remark here*".
Click to expand...
My philosophy teacher mused about this, to the effect of, "Did you ever notice that you can say something mean to someone, and say, 'just kidding,' but you still mean it? Isn't that great?"
😀
Click to expand...


hah QFT
 
Originally posted by: Syringer
So whenever someone prefaces something with "no offense" or something along those lines, it's usually because what they're about to say is offensive and they just want to find a nice way around it.

It's similar to "not to be a racist....but *insert racist remark here*".
Click to expand...

QFT.

It's true just about any time someone says "I don't mean to be ____, but..."; they mean to be ____.
 
If they say it often then it's going to piss me off, but if they're actually trying to be constructive, them I'll give them a chance.
 
...or it could be that they know how sensitive you are to just about anything and they have learned from previous experience that merely mentioning something in passing sets you off like a 5 year old.

so using terms like "no offense", or "nothing personal" is a way to preface the conversation so YOU know that they are not saying anything to piss you off as you have indicated in the past.

Remember conversation is a 2 way street, it takes a listener and a speaker and if ONE of them is bad at what they do, then the whole conversation is a waste.
 
Originally posted by: Wheezer
...or it could be that they know how sensitive you are to just about anything and they have learned from previous experience that merely mentioning something in passing sets you off like a 5 year old.

so using terms like "no offense", or "nothing personal" is a way to preface the conversation so YOU know that they are not saying anything to piss you off as you have indicated in the past.

Remember conversation is a 2 way street, it takes a listener and a speaker and if ONE of them is bad at what they do, then the whole conversation is a waste.
Click to expand...

No, usually they are saying something they know will offend you. No offense but you're a stupid piece of crap to even make such a post.
 
Originally posted by: mercanucaribe
Originally posted by: Wheezer
...or it could be that they know how sensitive you are to just about anything and they have learned from previous experience that merely mentioning something in passing sets you off like a 5 year old.

so using terms like "no offense", or "nothing personal" is a way to preface the conversation so YOU know that they are not saying anything to piss you off as you have indicated in the past.

Remember conversation is a 2 way street, it takes a listener and a speaker and if ONE of them is bad at what they do, then the whole conversation is a waste.
Click to expand...

No, usually they are saying something they know will offend you. No offense but you're a stupid piece of crap to even make such a post.
Click to expand...

Well first let me say thanks for proving my point.

Apparently you don't have much experience interacting with a variety of real people.

The reality is that different people are more sensitive to certain things than others....true?

So if you have only known someone for a short period of time and they ask if the shirt they are wearing make them look good when in reality it accentuates their love handles, it is very common to say something to the effect of

"Well to be honest...no offense intended... and don't take this personally, but since you asked I really don't think that shirt is your style"

rather than saying

"well honestly, that shirt make you look like a fat pig, you REALLY need to loose some weight before tying to wear it."


You especially want to use option #1 if the person you are dealing with is a sensitive, takes everything as a major criticism and any negative word is a personnel blow to their ego kind of person.

But I am sure that given enough time when you get out into the real world and actually learn to interact with other human beings on a face to face basis instead of sitting your ass behind a keyboard posting on this board on an average of 9+ times a day from mommy and daddy's basement you'll learn that...and yes there was offense intended.
 
Your poll is an irrelevant red herring. Anyone in the social sciences (qualitative research in particular) will tell you those phrases are common disclaimers. They serve to preempt any negative consequences of what is going to be said next.
 
Well said, I definitely like your post. I met a lot of sensitive people in my life and it is always best to be safe. Use option #1 at all cost.
 
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