what's the stupidest thing you've seen someone do at work?

[chusteczka]

Originally posted by: IHateMyJob2004
OK, one more. Did you know that there is a very high suicide rate among submariners? I found out when a statistic was added via gun on a ship that was under construction where I work.

I do not understand what you are saying here. I was a submariner for 4.5 years and never heard of a single suicide of a qualified submariner before or after that time. There are a few other submariners on this board. Maybe they know something about this that I do not.

 

[pontifex]

This happened at one of my jobs. I don't remember exactly what happened so I'll try to tell it as best as I can remember. There was a rumor going around that 2 people in the office were having an affair. We had some kind of contest or something (i forget why or for what exactly). Anyway, the stuff was hung on the walls so people could look at it. This one guy thought he'd be smart and create some kind of hidden message in his project. Turns out it said "person a and person b are having an affair." He was a pretty weird dude so I don't know if he thought he was so smart no one would figure it out or what, but someone did and he got fired. seriously dumb way to lose your job.

 

[BoomerD]

How stupid do you want to go?

Like the Ironworker who was working about 200 feet off the ground, hooked his safety harness around a piece of steel, then when he attached it to his safety belt, he missed the d-ring and hooked to his pliers? Needless to say, when he leaned back in his harness to work, the pliers came out of his belt and down he came..and was speared on a piece of 3 inch re-bar.

Or the electrician who climbed the light tower on a portable light plant without shutting it down to change a lightbulb...and was electrocuted 20 feet in the air.

or the pipefitter who thought, "anyone can run a crane," and jumped in one then turned it over into a large pond and drowned...

I worked construction for over 30 years...I've looked stupid in the face. (and some days, it looks back at me in the mirror) 😀

 

[IHateMyJob2004]

Originally posted by: Zaitsev
I work in a lab, and this new chick was trying to use good sterile technique by flamming the mouths of all the bottles she used. Apparently one liquid was an ethanol base and a nice size fireball shot out. My coworker muttered "Boom goes the dynamite" and we all lost it.

That's not funny.

Funny is having soem girl come up to you the night after the south park episode and before a word even gets out of here mouth, you scream "Weebollaaaaaa Timmayy"

 

[jagec]

Originally posted by: rezinn

Also saw a ~35k centrifuge destroyed by running it unbalanced. Was pretty old though.

A girl at our lab wrecked a centrifuge in a similar way. She didn't put the tray in straight, and once it got up to speed the thing flew apart. Best part: She and everyone else was in a lab meeting, otherwise they would have heard the noise and turned it off before it got wrecked. Luckily it was an older model...only cost about $5k (and that's the difference between research and clinical!).

Stupidest thing ever, unfortunately, was probably me.

I'd been working for maybe ~30 hours straight, and so I was out of it. There had been a screwup with one of our orders, and the guy who usually did ordering was out. So I walk over to his bench and check his papers. He's got one with the name of our salesperson and a phone number. I call the number on my cell.

Them: "Hello?"
Me: "Oh, hi, this is XXX from XXXXXX, I'm calling about our order, blah blah blah.....have any ideas?"
Them: "I've got an idea...why don't you go fuck yourself?"
Me: *surprised* "Umm...excuse me, I must have misheard..."
Them: "No, you got it right. Why don't you go fuck yourself?"
Me: "Right, well, obviously this isn't going anywhere" *click*

Then I turn to the other guy at the bench. "Huh, that guy must be having a BAD day or something...can you belief he just told me to go fuck myself?"

Other guy: "Huh, that's weird...let me check that number real fast" *hits redial, holds phone in his hand*
His phone rings, and he picks it up "Oh, hello!"
*into my phone* "Hi there, how are you?"
*into his phone* "Why don't you go fuck yourself"
*into my phone* "OK, I'll get right on that!"

Considering that I had made that call about 10 feet away from him, I looked REALLY dumb. When I'm tired, I can ONLY focus on one task. Turns out the guy who did ordering had written down the sales guy's name, and OUR phone number to give him for a callback #.

Needless to say, I haven't lived that one down yet.

 

[IronWing]

Guys set up chipper/shredder and started feeding limbs. Blew the windows out of their truck where they had the chipper outlet aimed.

 

[jagec]

Originally posted by: ironwing
Guys set up chipper/shredder and started feeding limbs.

What did the cops think?

 

[Argo]

Originally posted by: loki8481
I've got this coworker who's been on thin ice for awhile (the fact that he was the only one in the department who didn't get a yearly raise should have been a big sign)... attendance issues, generally being bad at his job, etc. everyone pretty much knew that the writing was on the wall.

instead of trying to get better, he just continued to plod along and steadily decline. this past week, he decided to call out sick -- but it wasn't enough just to call out sick, he was actually laughing on the phone while telling his boss he was sick /facepalm... I think my boss must've just snapped, because he fired him on the spot over the phone.

not sure what this retard was thinking... if you know you work in an at-will state and you know your boss hates you, at least pretend to actually be sick.

Seen similar things several time. There was also a case where somebody called in saying they're working from home, while it was super obvious that their laptop is in the office (and you can only VPN from your laptop).

 

[Bill Brasky]

Originally posted by: IHateMyJob2004

Originally posted by: Zaitsev
I work in a lab, and this new chick was trying to use good sterile technique by flamming the mouths of all the bottles she used. Apparently one liquid was an ethanol base and a nice size fireball shot out. My coworker muttered "Boom goes the dynamite" and we all lost it.

That's not funny.

Funny is having soem girl come up to you the night after the south park episode and before a word even gets out of here mouth, you scream "Weebollaaaaaa Timmayy"

Yeah I fail at interweb humor. I can tell stories better in person.

 

[Farang]

Me.. many times.

There was the time I decided it was a good idea to stab at my plastic gloves at a pizza joint I worked at, so I kept stabbing holes between the my fingers through the gloves before I cut myself and blood started dripping all over the floor and I ran outside with a paper towel. My co-workers made fun of my runny blood and said it didn't clot because I was a stoner.

Then there was the time the restaurant wasn't very busy so I made a personal cheese pizza and put a bunch of pot on it and put it through the oven. Then my manager saw it coming out and asked if it was pot. I said maybe and went to the back and ate the pizza real quick.

Another time at the end of my shift I was mopping the floors and my friend stopped by because we were going to hang out afterwards. He had a bottle of 151 so I grabbed a paper kiddy cup and he kept pouring me shots. The mopping was a bit crooked that night.

There is probably more I don't remember but when I try to think of other people doing stupid things I can only think of myself.

 

[Locut0s]

Originally posted by: Farang
Me.. many times.

There was the time I decided it was a good idea to stab at my plastic gloves at a pizza joint I worked at, so I kept stabbing holes between the my fingers through the gloves before I cut myself and blood started dripping all over the floor and I ran outside with a paper towel. My co-workers made fun of my runny blood and said it didn't clot because I was a stoner.

Then there was the time the restaurant wasn't very busy so I made a personal cheese pizza and put a bunch of pot on it and put it through the oven. Then my manager saw it coming out and asked if it was pot. I said maybe and went to the back and ate the pizza real quick.

Another time at the end of my shift I was mopping the floors and my friend stopped by because we were going to hang out afterwards. He had a bottle of 151 so I grabbed a paper kiddy cup and he kept pouring me shots. The mopping was a bit crooked that night.

There is probably more I don't remember but when I try to think of other people doing stupid things I can only think of myself.

These real? Wow...

 

[Farang]

Unfortunately yes. Also, one of my managers would place pitchers of beer in front of me and say 'I poured the wrong kind, pour this in the sink' with kind of a smile because he hated his job and knew I was a fuckup so I'd chug the pitcher of beer and he would shake his head and walk away.

 

[freegeeks]

I was paid to watch porn for a few years. I worked for an IPTV provider and one of my responsibilities was handling the VOD complaints for adult entertainement. A couple of times a week it was my job to come in at 9 and watch movies with titles like Horny Housewives 7.

 

[pstylesss]

One of my coworkers who likes to cause drama created a "Box of shame" in the kitchen to place unwashed dishes of fellow co-workers. This same person also went digging through peoples trash trying to find out who purchased Famous Amus cookies from the coffee fund, a fund she does not contribute to.

I once sent out a long (funny to the direct recipients) email about the evil cubical dwellers (referring to the woman above who dwells in a cube). Apparently "evil cubical dwellers" is offensive. The email was sent to upper management from her, I was called into my bosses office. He told me it probably wasn't a good idea to do it again, but thought the email was humorous. There was some off colour things in it which could have really screwed me, but it was my first offense like that so... I was let off the hook.

 

[Lalakai]

several years back came to work monday morning, not in the best of moods and immediately got a call from a client. This client had already completely pissed off several others in the department and as i was youngest on scrotum pole, i was assigned to deal with him. Call was routed to my desk and i put him on hold while i gathering my patience and was alternately blowing off some steam about dealing with idiots that couldn't make up their minds, stupid people who thought rules were for someone else but not them, and hoping that they didn't breed so that their genetics wouldn't contaminate the world anymore. Finally cooled down enough to talk with him, only to realize that i had put him on speaker phone instead of hold. Saving grace was that my boss also knew the guy was an idiot, so he just laughed it off. but good lesson about phones.

a new employee was being trained (field engineer, female, minority) when she suddenly runs from the work site and jumps back into the truck and refuses to continue the survey. Deathly afraid of spiders and she had seen one in the grass. She was promoted to a desk job and now does quality control checks, on jobs where she has no actual work experience.

Guy at the office who is definitely a bit rough at the edges, was walking by a desk and seen a friend of his (female) bending over the desk talking to another person about a project. Slaps her on the bottom, only to find it was the co-workers wife. His explaination to his supervisor "I thought she was someone else". needless to say there was a few career counseling sessions for that one.

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: Locut0s

Originally posted by: Farang
Me.. many times.

There was the time I decided it was a good idea to stab at my plastic gloves at a pizza joint I worked at, so I kept stabbing holes between the my fingers through the gloves before I cut myself and blood started dripping all over the floor and I ran outside with a paper towel. My co-workers made fun of my runny blood and said it didn't clot because I was a stoner.

Then there was the time the restaurant wasn't very busy so I made a personal cheese pizza and put a bunch of pot on it and put it through the oven. Then my manager saw it coming out and asked if it was pot. I said maybe and went to the back and ate the pizza real quick.

Another time at the end of my shift I was mopping the floors and my friend stopped by because we were going to hang out afterwards. He had a bottle of 151 so I grabbed a paper kiddy cup and he kept pouring me shots. The mopping was a bit crooked that night.

There is probably more I don't remember but when I try to think of other people doing stupid things I can only think of myself.

These real? Wow...

If true, this explains a lot. . .

 

[911paramedic]

Originally posted by: PlasmaBomb

Originally posted by: preslove

Originally posted by: NSFW

Originally posted by: rh71

Originally posted by: 911paramedic
Paramedic arrived first and gave IM benadryl to an asthma patient.

Man had a pressure cooker blow up on him, arrived to the wife answering the door (with a large tub of butter) saying "I covered him with butter as soon as it happened!", and being quite smitten with her actions. It took a lot of morphine and rubbing to remove all the butter from the poor guy.

Too many to list...

we want a dedicated subforum with your stories.

This

That

Newsletter?

OK, couple more.

Lady that was staying in a hotel/casino on the strip mistook superglue for eye drops and glued her eye shut. (Surprisingly, this happens quite often according to the ER docs.)

13YO kid missed the beans but caught his frank in his zipper. Meanwhile, the 15YO sister was having a sleepover with about eight friends and they were the ones that called 911. Poor kid, I couldn't "free willie" on scene so he had to go to the ER. (And yes, all the girls were standing around and knew what he done.

EDIT: spelling error.

 

[olds]

We had this female on our crew. Females that aren't gay are cute around construction equipment.
She was off loading a backhoe from an equipment trailer. Hoes have two brake pedals. Left wheel and right wheel. There is a lever that is hinged so you can operate the pedals independantly (you can steer with the brakes) or you put the lever down and both pedals operate at the same time bringing the vehicle to a stop in a straight line.
She didn't have the lever in and when she was coming off the trailer, she hit the left brake pedal. The hoe pivoted off the trailer and had one wheel on the trailer and the other on the ground. It was precariously perched and in danger of tipping over. Another operator that to walk if off the trailer.

I also seen her drive over her hard hat and a hand held radio. She got out of a loader at lunch and put both on the tire of the loader. After lunch, she jumped back into the loader and drove away, crushing her hard hat and an expensive radio.

 

[sdifox]

<-- neffing on atot

 

[olds]

Originally posted by: sdifox
<-- neffing on atot

^^^^ banned on atot

Damnit! Where did my banstick go?

 

[Feldenak]

Didn't completely tighten his connections on the oxygen lance and the thing blew up in his hand while blowing down a furnace. He was lucky his hand was still attached.

 

[Jeffg010]

I work for a large bank with 10,000 employees. About 6 or 7 years ago we got hit with one of the worst worm virus ever on our network. It brought the system down and all PCs that booted onto the network got infected. We started rolling out the patch for all PCs we are talking 10,000 PCs that needed to get patch. By the 3rd day this virus was still hitting us and the top CEO was pissed. Everything was put on hold for the computer techs and top priority was to get it under control. It was quite the learning experience.

The network guys traced the origin of the virus and found the company that we outsourced for hardware one of the their workers brought in a laptop he had from home and connected it to the network. That laptop was infected and spread the virus. After that the screws got really tight on every PC. We got new software that pushed every patch update to every PC that logs in. People bitch how slow their PC/laptop boots but in the morning but every MS patch, virus update, and scans are running at the same time when they boot up for their own good.

 

[ggnl]

While i was doing pizza delivery, one of the other drivers left his car running and unlocked while making a delivery to a housing project. The buildings are designed the way many projects are where you have to go into a hallway in the building to get to the apartment doors, so he couldn't keep an eye on his car. Of course it had been stolen when he came back out.

 

[skyking]

Originally posted by: oldsmoboat
We had this female on our crew. Females that aren't gay are cute around construction equipment.
She was off loading a backhoe from an equipment trailer. Hoes have two brake pedals. Left wheel and right wheel. There is a lever that is hinged so you can operate the pedals independantly (you can steer with the brakes) or you put the lever down and both pedals operate at the same time bringing the vehicle to a stop in a straight line.
She didn't have the lever in and when she was coming off the trailer, she hit the left brake pedal. The hoe pivoted off the trailer and had one wheel on the trailer and the other on the ground. It was precariously perched and in danger of tipping over. Another operator that to walk if off the trailer.

I also seen her drive over her hard hat and a hand held radio. She got out of a loader at lunch and put both on the tire of the loader. After lunch, she jumped back into the loader and drove away, crushing her hard hat and an expensive radio.

Hehehe.
I was working on a cliff with an excavator over US 12, and they used a backhoe to clear out the trees and rocks I tossed down. This lady always had the lever locked, if I ever used it I unlocked it. Backhoes are worthless in tight quarters with the lever locked over.
I remember looking down and watching her head for the bushes when she stabbed the brake and got only the one side😛

 

[sdifox]

A lady that used to be my secretary (at my last workplace) is running a business from her cubicle over the phone...after I left