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what's the key to being happy? :updated:

SaintGRW

Golden Member
monday thru friday i wake up @ 6am watch a little tv doze on and off, get up shower get dressed and head to work, sit in work with no work to do. which is like extremely boring since i'm on a 166Mhz computer w/ 48MB of ram, skip lunch so that i can get out of work @ 4 so i can go home, i get home around 5, sit on my computer and watch tv til between 1am and 2am because i can't sleep, i haven't had a decent nights rest in 4 months and i don't know the last time i actually had a dream was....my weekends are consumed by working on my car or trying to sit in my room and not have my mom nag me about something, sunday nights. i work. i don't think i've had a car on the road for more than 3 months at a time without a problem, or having it inspected or insurced (progressive insurance's fault)

every night i end up sitting in my room wishing i had friends to go catch a movie with or something and i'm getting sick of it, every day it's just worse and worse. the only thing i'm looking forward to in the near future is snowboarding since it's the only thing i have to do since i'm not in school.

is the key to being happy friends? cause i lack that area and this sucks. i wanna go to college in a year but i don't know if i'll have too much in bills to pay to the point where i can't afford to not work or what....

🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁
 
Originally posted by: SaintGRW
to clear up any confusion i didn't make this thread as a joke🙁

Well, just remember this: you're not supposed to be happy all the time. Life doesn't work this way. If you can accept that you'll be one step ahead.

amish
 
IMO, the key to happiness is companionship. Regular friends or significant others, it doesn't matter. If you are with people that you like, you will be happy. If you're having trouble making friends, then all the more reason to go back to school. I don't know a single person that didn't make friends at school easy-peasy.
 
I think the key, or at least one of them, to happiness is activity. You have to keep doing something. Keep active. Move around, especially out and away from home. Your activity will bring you into contact with new ideas, people and opportunities.

I've noticed this problem with my son. Other than work, he spends all his time in his room cut off from the real world. I've been after him for months to get out and do something, anything.

BTW, I had the same problem when I was in my early 20's. I forced myself to start taking a class or two at the local community college just to force myself to get out of the house. I met a few people and we started playing handball in the mornings. I met some of their friends and was introduced to other things to do that I hadn't thought of. It took time, but it worked for me.

Now here I am many years later going to work and spending all my spare time in front of this damn computer posting on BB's.
 
You know I was just discussing this last night with some people, some friends, some acquaintances.

It's a difficult and decieving question in of itself. I cannot answer for you what happiness in your life
will equate to, but I think I can bring to light one pathway towards happiness. This will probably sound
a little ambiguous, but that is only because I don't know you well enough, and there are questions which
you must answer for yourself before you continue searching for the key to being happy.

Being happy requires a process of self-realization. And just the action of your asking that question means
that you are now beginning to introspect. Right now in your life, it seems that the reasons for your not
feeling happy stem from
(1) Feeling that you are lacking adequate social interaction--you want more friends, people to spend free
time with . . . now there are many ways to try and solve this problem--how old are you? where can you
find other people that you can relate to and enjoy their company? Can you find people like this at work?
Are there any organizations or groups you can join or try to participate in to meet new people? You'll see
that the process to happiness requires a lot of question asking, because you must come upon it yourself.

(2) Do you have a goal? You mentioned going to college, and being tired of work--If you have a goal that you
feel you have not achieved, but that achieving this goal will give you a sense of satisfaction (or perhaps
even happiness) then there is no reason why you should not attempt to accomplish this. Many people have
financial situations similar to yours I'm sure, and they find ways of making things work, so that they can
attend college--whether it be financial aid, or starting out at a community college and then transferring (since
community colleges tend to be MUCH less expensive, and still allow you to get a good deal of your program
out of the way, before you transfer to a 4 year college or university).

There are more questions to ask yourself--but the important thing to realize is that without times like this one happiness
means little--the feelings of unhappiness now will make you further appreciate your happiness later--if all you ever
experienced in life was happiness you would never realize it because there would be nothing to compare it to, and the same
is true to a lesser extent with extended periods of happiness.

I've written quite a bit here, and actually I could probably keep going, but I've got to run to work now too. I'd love to continue
discussing this with you, if you have anymore questions, either in response to anything I've said or to clarify anything I've mentioned
please feel free to ask.

Good luck.
 
Hey, I understand. Because of stupid Alabama laws regarding licensing, I am unable to work here in Alabama. (We are working on other possibilities, but things are slow). So, for the last 6 months, I have sat on my ass day after day after day. Skoorb works so I just sit here. At first, it was unbearable. I was so lonely and miserable. We didn't have any friends, we lived in an area with no public transit and we only have one car so I was literally stuck inside all day. (Skoorb commutes a fair distance each day so driving him to work was just silly.) I knew I had to make friends, I am a sociable person. I relied on Skoorb for everything and that was just putting too much stress on him as well. So, we went out and made friends. It is not really that hard to do, you just have to be willing to do it. It made a huge difference to me as I didn't rely on Skoorb 100% for companionship and suddenly, I had female friends to talk with. Skoorb will always be my best friend but the two of us now having friends, makes life a lot more enjoyable and meaningful.

Friends and Family make me happy. Skoorb is my family at the moment and now, we have friends other than each other. 🙂
 
My mother used to say to me when I would tell her I was bored
"there are no boring times, only boring people"

and one of my favorites, she wasn't even trying to impart wisdom on this one, we were talking on the phone and she asked me to write something down and I couldn't because there only flashlights and screwdrivers and heatsink grease in my pencil holder, I said "dammit, theres never any pens in this holder" she replied "you have total control over that"

#1. boredom and happiness are states of mind.
#2. don't complain about the enviroment you created.
 
Originally posted by: MrsSkoorb

Friends and Family make me happy. Skoorb is my family at the moment and now, we have friends other than each other. 🙂

Poor Skoorbie...does he know about any of this? 😀
 
Originally posted by: MaxDSP
Originally posted by: MrsSkoorb

Friends and Family make me happy. Skoorb is my family at the moment and now, we have friends other than each other. 🙂

Poor Skoorbie...does he know about any of this? 😀

Yeah, poor guy! He has his hands full with me! 🙂
 
i'm 20 years old, i tried to get into a career the quicker way and went for my MCSE certifications, i haven't taken the tests yet, i just can't get myself to for some reason i've tried. the place i work i think the youngest person other than me is 28 everyones like 30 thru 40. i work full time so i can't take 1 or 2 classes during the day and don't wanna attend night classes. i have 20k in loans 15 for the certification courses and 5k in personal loans. couple problems i have with going out and just meeting people. is that i can't. every time i've asked someone to do something(girl) i get shot down cause she's busy or can't or doesn't want to or some reason, and it takes me a long time to go ok suck it up and try again and every time it takes me longer to suck it up. i don't know of anywhere really to meet people other than clubs or the mall or school, i don't attend school, i gotta be up for work so clubs isn't a good idea and i don't usually have free cash to go to the mall and i don't go just to meet people just cause well. i don't. i don't really know of any organizations around here. and what i want to do is become a network administrator, but i have to take my certs. i think a reason i can't get myself to take the certs is when i get them i'll want to get a network admin job or something to make money but if i do that i'll still no be making any friends, Gah!. aim is the cause of all my damn problems!
 
I take it you are what, (linked above, you are 20 years old)? You might wanna try to get involved with something in order to meet up with people. What that would be, I have no clue, but I recommend doing it. Maybe volunteer work, or church groups or something? I really don't know... Also, if you do go to college, live in the dorms on campus, and you will have a ton of friends in no time.

EDIT: Umm, you might wanna try to make guy friends before girl friends, it might be easier. Then after you get a good base of friends, you start hitting on their friends or sisters. Does your community have clubs? Like maybe a volleyball, chess, snowboarding, whatever community clubs?
 
The key to happiness is moderation. Don't spend too much time in front of the computer/tv. Get up and FORCE yourself to workout. I mean, run and do some exercise type things. This will make you sleep better at night and make you sleep deeper and get the most out of your sleep time. Your body will get stronger and you'll have more energy to power your mind. People will notice this and you'll meet more people and have more friends because of it. The key to happiness is getting involved in things you enjoy and living life to its fullest. If you're not happy, maybe you're spending too much time by yourself...find some friends that are on a similar schedule as you and find out if they wanna hang out. I know how you feel....I go back to that place about once a year for a couple of months and live like a hermit...
 
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