What would you do in this situation?

[minendo]

Originally posted by: gigapet
i heard girls take the pill for other reasons besides not having babies.

Exactly what I said to him, but she just told them right away that they were in fact having sex.

 

[nater]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212
Dude, your friend shouldn't have to be in that situation.. Am I the only one that thinks this is freaking weird? Since the girl is TECHNICALLY a minor (though 17 is a pretty fair age to be having sex), they CAN have a talk with their daughter about being responsible, etc. etc. etc.. I believe that taking the pill is a sign of responsibility.. Regardless, the conversation should be between mother/father and daughter and not with the boyfriend! That's insane.. What are they going to say "Don't fvck my daughter!" or "ok, fvck my daughter, just be safe" .. Either way it's going to be a very weird and unnecessary meeting.. If I was you I'd talk to my GF and have her throw a hissy fit "You're not meeting with him! I love him and he loves me! Talk to me, not him.. "blah blah blah.. There's no reason to put him in that situation... If they were 14 and 18 it would be different.. I'd lend em my shotgun if I had one.. If they were not using protection, it would be different to (that would be the time for a long talk about mutual responsibility), if they were promiscuous that may also be warranted.. but they seem like normal kids in a longterm relationship that have a healthy sex life.. Big deal.. the last time my parents found condoms (keep in mind that they're really, really conservative people) i don't them to be happy that i'm using condoms and that i've been with the same girl for many years, unlike other people my age.... it took a lot of guts but that was the end of the conversation..

sure, sounds great, but, if they ever hope to get married, or become even more serious, they're going to have to deal with her parents, and completely avoiding them in this situation would probably not be a good way to start.

 

[Lonyo]

I think they should point out the fact that there were birth control pills, meaning at least they were being sensible about it.

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: nater

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212
Dude, your friend shouldn't have to be in that situation.. Am I the only one that thinks this is freaking weird? Since the girl is TECHNICALLY a minor (though 17 is a pretty fair age to be having sex), they CAN have a talk with their daughter about being responsible, etc. etc. etc.. I believe that taking the pill is a sign of responsibility.. Regardless, the conversation should be between mother/father and daughter and not with the boyfriend! That's insane.. What are they going to say "Don't fvck my daughter!" or "ok, fvck my daughter, just be safe" .. Either way it's going to be a very weird and unnecessary meeting.. If I was you I'd talk to my GF and have her throw a hissy fit "You're not meeting with him! I love him and he loves me! Talk to me, not him.. "blah blah blah.. There's no reason to put him in that situation... If they were 14 and 18 it would be different.. I'd lend em my shotgun if I had one.. If they were not using protection, it would be different to (that would be the time for a long talk about mutual responsibility), if they were promiscuous that may also be warranted.. but they seem like normal kids in a longterm relationship that have a healthy sex life.. Big deal.. the last time my parents found condoms (keep in mind that they're really, really conservative people) i don't them to be happy that i'm using condoms and that i've been with the same girl for many years, unlike other people my age.... it took a lot of guts but that was the end of the conversation..

sure, sounds great, but, if they ever hope to get married, or become even more serious, they're going to have to deal with her parents, and completely avoiding them in this situation would probably not be a good way to start.

I disagree.. The bf should not refuse and the gf should make it seem like SHE doesn't want them to talk.. Saying "Bobby doesn't want to talk to you!" is bad.. Saying "You don't have to talk to him, he's not your son and your not his parents!" is better...

 

[Nitemare]

I'd go to the meeting and tell her parents to go outside and play Hide and go fvck yourself. The girl will be 18 in a year and can do whatever she wants then. They had best give her some lattitude or they will be sorry later.

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: Nitemare
I'd go to the meeting and tell her parents to go outside and play Hide and go fvck yourself. The girl will be 18 in a year and can do whatever she wants then. They had best give her some lattitude or they will be sorry later.

I agree with you.. Once your daughter or son is past edging closer to 18 you can guide them and support them but you can't really run their lives..

 

[crumpet19]

Originally posted by: Viper GTS

Originally posted by: dxkj
is 18 and 17 legal?

Almost certainly, there's likely a window in which it's legal. In Oregon it's three years.

Until she's 18 there's really nothing TO do. Once she's 18 she can do what she wants, as long as she realizes her parents are under no obligation to continue to house/feed/clothe/etc her.

Viper GTS

In Oklahoma the legal age of consent is 16. However, this is void if one party is under 18 and there is a (i believe) 4 year age difference. IE: 16 & 20-21.

 

[nater]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

Originally posted by: nater

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212
Dude, your friend shouldn't have to be in that situation.. Am I the only one that thinks this is freaking weird? Since the girl is TECHNICALLY a minor (though 17 is a pretty fair age to be having sex), they CAN have a talk with their daughter about being responsible, etc. etc. etc.. I believe that taking the pill is a sign of responsibility.. Regardless, the conversation should be between mother/father and daughter and not with the boyfriend! That's insane.. What are they going to say "Don't fvck my daughter!" or "ok, fvck my daughter, just be safe" .. Either way it's going to be a very weird and unnecessary meeting.. If I was you I'd talk to my GF and have her throw a hissy fit "You're not meeting with him! I love him and he loves me! Talk to me, not him.. "blah blah blah.. There's no reason to put him in that situation... If they were 14 and 18 it would be different.. I'd lend em my shotgun if I had one.. If they were not using protection, it would be different to (that would be the time for a long talk about mutual responsibility), if they were promiscuous that may also be warranted.. but they seem like normal kids in a longterm relationship that have a healthy sex life.. Big deal.. the last time my parents found condoms (keep in mind that they're really, really conservative people) i don't them to be happy that i'm using condoms and that i've been with the same girl for many years, unlike other people my age.... it took a lot of guts but that was the end of the conversation..

sure, sounds great, but, if they ever hope to get married, or become even more serious, they're going to have to deal with her parents, and completely avoiding them in this situation would probably not be a good way to start.

I disagree.. The bf should not refuse and the gf should make it seem like SHE doesn't want them to talk.. Saying "Bobby doesn't want to talk to you!" is bad.. Saying "You don't have to talk to him, he's not your son and your not his parents!" is better...

I guess I agree with you there...she probably should try that, but I'm guessing they will press the issue.

 

""Hi, I'm an adult. How about we meet again once you're 18?" "

Huh? Excuse me? You must have created a false dilemma? Maybe he deserves to be dumped by her if all that keeps him with her is the sex. :disgust:

Frankly, I think her parents have the right to snoop. If she's underage and she gives them reason not to trust her, then they're right in snooping. Too much snooping is what I don't agree with. Also, when someone's underage, he or she is likely to make poor choices and there's a tremendous amount of weight and pressure put upon her by her peers. Sometimes kids are crying for attention or help. They don't have to say it explicitly. Peer pressure sometimes isn't what children want. They would rather be rescued from the pressure.

I say this guy should have respect for her and speak to her parents. If they disapprove of their conducts, then he has a choice as an adult. But he has no business disrespecting the parents of a minor.

 

[conjur]

Talk to her parents but be ready for a butt-reaming at first.

If everyone keeps cool heads, things should work out to an agreeable solution.