In 1984 at the age of 21 my long-time girlfriend left me. It was a complete shock, and I didn't handle it well. I began drinking heavily, and eventually turned to drugs as well. For about a year and a half, all I did was drink and get high. Thankfully I was able to keep it together on the job(except for some attendance issues).
One morning I found myself in my parents living room (I did not have my own place) staring at the blank TV screen. I had no idea how long I was there, where I had been, or when I had come home. It scared the crap out of me. I promised at that point to get straight, and thank God it's been 20 years and I am OK.
I believe my problem was emotional rather than physical, some people have chemical imbalances that require medication. I am very lucky that I didn't and was able to overcome my problems on my own.
One morning I found myself in my parents living room (I did not have my own place) staring at the blank TV screen. I had no idea how long I was there, where I had been, or when I had come home. It scared the crap out of me. I promised at that point to get straight, and thank God it's been 20 years and I am OK.
I believe my problem was emotional rather than physical, some people have chemical imbalances that require medication. I am very lucky that I didn't and was able to overcome my problems on my own.
Getting divorced. Glad i'm not with her anymore, but it sucks that she uses my daughter as a pawn against my family and I. She graduated from a Bible college to boot, ohh the irony. She reads alot of my posts to spy on me and see what i'm up to, so in case shes reading this now, please reconsider letting my mom hang out with Maya.
Sorry for the drama...
Sorry for the drama...
HeroOfPellinor
Lifer
- Dec 27, 2001
- 11,272
- 1
- 0
You vote Democrat and you're an atheist. Correct? I'll expound.
People who vote Democrat tend to want the government to 1) take care of them and solve their problems and 2) condone all their decisions good or bad. This attitude is one of assuming no responsibility for yourself. Sooner or later, sooner it sounds like, you're going to realize that nobody is going to drop contentment and prosperity in your lap like Santa Claus and that there are some activities or habits you have that, while legal, are not particularly healthy for you emotionally.
And, as an atheist, you were born from monkeys and, upon death, will greet nothing but empty darkness and every minute that passes is another one nearer to that inevitability.
You're unhappy because your lifestyle and beliefs are contrary to your soul. Your heart knows you're incomplete but your pride prevents you from acknowledging this fact so you post questions on this message board so you can feel less alone for a time, but you're really hoping somebody will provide you a magic pill an if you just read this or think this way or do this that you'll somehow become better.
Again, these are just my typical fundamentalist Christian ravings, so ignore them at your leisure. But do me a favor before you hit rock rock bottom and ask yourself if you just feel like there's something missing. If so, then here's a hint: It's not money, or friends, or Buddha, or the Bible, or church, or L Ron Hubbard, or Fausto's bike club. First, stop blaming Dick Cheney for your problems. Next stop waiting for Harry Potter to wave a magic wand and fix them. And go seek what's missing. Once you're complete....everything else can't help but fall into place.
People who vote Democrat tend to want the government to 1) take care of them and solve their problems and 2) condone all their decisions good or bad. This attitude is one of assuming no responsibility for yourself. Sooner or later, sooner it sounds like, you're going to realize that nobody is going to drop contentment and prosperity in your lap like Santa Claus and that there are some activities or habits you have that, while legal, are not particularly healthy for you emotionally.
And, as an atheist, you were born from monkeys and, upon death, will greet nothing but empty darkness and every minute that passes is another one nearer to that inevitability.
You're unhappy because your lifestyle and beliefs are contrary to your soul. Your heart knows you're incomplete but your pride prevents you from acknowledging this fact so you post questions on this message board so you can feel less alone for a time, but you're really hoping somebody will provide you a magic pill an if you just read this or think this way or do this that you'll somehow become better.
Again, these are just my typical fundamentalist Christian ravings, so ignore them at your leisure. But do me a favor before you hit rock rock bottom and ask yourself if you just feel like there's something missing. If so, then here's a hint: It's not money, or friends, or Buddha, or the Bible, or church, or L Ron Hubbard, or Fausto's bike club. First, stop blaming Dick Cheney for your problems. Next stop waiting for Harry Potter to wave a magic wand and fix them. And go seek what's missing. Once you're complete....everything else can't help but fall into place.
oh geeze........I'm so sorry...how old are you now?
My lowest was getting expelled from college a few days before graduation...to this day I know I could've handled the situation differently, but still don't feel like I should've been expelled.
I want to vomit when I think of all the hours I wasted playing computer games and surfing porn honestly. I mean, playing a computer game for maybe an hour or so after work isn't bad, but tehre were days when I would play for like 5 or 6 hours, and years when I would average 4 hours per day..what a waste! I wish I had been going to the gym instead!
Do you really believe that what you just said actually helps your cause? It comes across combative and condescending.
When my Father came from the Dr's office into the waiting room, sat down beside us and told us he had cancer . :brokenheart:
Only surpassed by 1yr and 3wks later when we held his hand as he passed.
Slowly things have gotten easier, but never will be the same.
Only surpassed by 1yr and 3wks later when we held his hand as he passed.
Slowly things have gotten easier, but never will be the same.
I have a few. The #1 lowpoint in my life is something that I would only confess to a priest and God. It's something that prevents me from even being able to look myself in the eye in the morning and not a day goes by that I don't think about it with the deepest regret. If I could go back in time I would kick the living sh*t out of myself.
#2 is the fact that my Dad passed away in November of '02 and my Mom passed away December of '04.
Needless to say, the holidays SUCK for me. I don't get cranky or anything; just quiet, as do my sisters. My wife seems to forget everything that my sisters and I have been through, which really doesn't help matters. Just a few days ago she said "I don't understand why you're so quiet lately". I told her to use her imagination and just left it at that.
Some people's children, I swear...
#2 is the fact that my Dad passed away in November of '02 and my Mom passed away December of '04.
Needless to say, the holidays SUCK for me. I don't get cranky or anything; just quiet, as do my sisters. My wife seems to forget everything that my sisters and I have been through, which really doesn't help matters. Just a few days ago she said "I don't understand why you're so quiet lately". I told her to use her imagination and just left it at that.
Some people's children, I swear...
Me too. I was VERY addicted to Counter-Strike and, later on, Soldier of Fortune II. I woke up one day and was disgusted by how much time I had invested in NOTHING. I now play games very casually... 30 minutes or so two or three times a week. I just do it to fill the gaps in time... like when I don't feel like cleaning.
I went through about a year of pretty bad drug addiction coming out of high school. I guess I was expecting my life to improve once I started going through the whole college experience. When it didn't, I turned to amphetamines as a crutch for some of the personal problems I was having at the time. It's weird to look back at it now, because it seems like I was relatively happy, but I know it was all chemically induced.
More recently, I broke up with my long term GF and suddenly realized how little I had without her. Just mutual plans that I couldn't follow through on and mutual friends that I didn't want to see anymore. Luckily, some of my older friends caught on to my situation and swooped in to take care of me. It was still a rough time, but it would have been far worse if I had to face it alone. The moral of the story: never neglect your friends for a woman.
More recently, I broke up with my long term GF and suddenly realized how little I had without her. Just mutual plans that I couldn't follow through on and mutual friends that I didn't want to see anymore. Luckily, some of my older friends caught on to my situation and swooped in to take care of me. It was still a rough time, but it would have been far worse if I had to face it alone. The moral of the story: never neglect your friends for a woman.
Having to file for divorce; losing my high-paying, contract job; A/C on car going out; being force to sell home.
What a great summer that was!
How did I get out of it? Time. Eventually got a job, moved to a decent apartment, realized all that mattered was spending time with my daughters.
What a great summer that was!
How did I get out of it? Time. Eventually got a job, moved to a decent apartment, realized all that mattered was spending time with my daughters.
I committed an act so heinous, it's been torturing my soul ever since. I'm contemplating turning myself in, I think I'm going to go crazy if I don't.
Spring of 2000 found me:
- divorced
- living out of my car
- in a constant drunken stupor
- unintentionally hurting alot of people feelings
- losing my best friend
- surrounded by people, but yet alone
- in debt up to my eyeballs
- losing my house
- losing my car
- losing my dog
- divorced
- living out of my car
- in a constant drunken stupor
- unintentionally hurting alot of people feelings
- losing my best friend
- surrounded by people, but yet alone
- in debt up to my eyeballs
- losing my house
- losing my car
- losing my dog
datalink7
Lifer
- Jan 23, 2001
- 16,765
- 6
- 81
My dad found out the day after christmas 3 years ago that his wife (my mom) had been cheating on him for years and none of his kids were for certain his biologically.
He flipped out and walked out the door. Found a can of gasoline and poured it over himself. He tried to light himself on fire but a stranger stopped it unknowningly.
So he comes back to the house, grabs a few things, and leaves.
It hurt me a lot because I'm very close to my dad. He put his family before everything. He could have been a millionaire (another story), but he wanted to spend time with use instead of the hours it would have required. He worked 7 days a week for 2 years without taking sick leave once. And then he felt he had been working so hard all those years for a lie, and it broke him.
He still isn't over it, and I don't think I can get over it untill he does. And I don't know if he ever will.
He flipped out and walked out the door. Found a can of gasoline and poured it over himself. He tried to light himself on fire but a stranger stopped it unknowningly.
So he comes back to the house, grabs a few things, and leaves.
It hurt me a lot because I'm very close to my dad. He put his family before everything. He could have been a millionaire (another story), but he wanted to spend time with use instead of the hours it would have required. He worked 7 days a week for 2 years without taking sick leave once. And then he felt he had been working so hard all those years for a lie, and it broke him.
He still isn't over it, and I don't think I can get over it untill he does. And I don't know if he ever will.
I have seen and tended to people in much deeper sh!t than I've ever been in. I've always come out of crap relatively OK, so I've got no reason to complain.
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