What Should I Do?

[GrantMeThePower]

Originally posted by: bobbybe01

As we are going to sleep we start holding hands and i guess for a lack of a better term- cuddling. Regardless we were very close, intertwined even. There were a few times in which this closness created difficult, um, situations for me in which i had to be careful about where my body parts and hers were, if you know what I mean.

I know exactly what you mean...

From this thread

THIS IS WHERE IT BEGAN GOING TO HELL IN A HANDBASKET. We were lying there cuddling when I feel my weenie start to twitch. I?m thinking to myself that this is going to get ugly. I can just imagine getting full wood and embarrassing myself because I don?t have enough room to back away from her so that she doesn?t feel it pressing up against her butt.

:laugh: Yes. That is exactly what I mean.

 

[elektrolokomotive]

Your Cliff notes need Cliff notes.

 

[Yossarian]

for all intents and purposes she is already cheating on her bf with you, so you may as well fvck her.

 

[GrantMeThePower]

Originally posted by: Yossarian
for all intents and purposes she is already cheating on her bf with you, so you may as well fvck her.

I believe that you are the second person to have said something to that extent. How is what she is doing cheating, in your book? I am actually curious, because I've wondered that myself in the past two days.

 

[Yossarian]

think of it this way. if you had a gf and she was spending the night at some dude's house, cuddling and sleeping in his bed, wouldn't that feel like she was cheating on you? at least emotionally? you dig her, she stays over, now you must complete the trifecta by tapping that tight little ass.

 

[OneOfTheseDays]

um sleeping over at some other dude's house is cheating in my book. if my girl ever tried that she'd be kicked to the curb. i trust women like i trust a fat kid not eating anything at a candy store.

 

Originally posted by: GrantMeThePower

Originally posted by: Yossarian
for all intents and purposes she is already cheating on her bf with you, so you may as well fvck her.

I believe that you are the second person to have said something to that extent. How is what she is doing cheating, in your book? I am actually curious, because I've wondered that myself in the past two days.

She has formed an intimate emotional relationship with you. It doesn't matter that you two haven't kissed or physically had relations. The fact that you slept in the same bed with her knowing that she has strong feelings for you means that you catalyzed her cheating.

Don't get caught up in technicalities. Cheating is often achieved by relationships that never turn sexual.

 

[GrantMeThePower]

Originally posted by: Sudheer Anne
um sleeping over at some other dude's house is cheating in my book. if my girl ever tried that she'd be kicked to the curb. i trust women like i trust a fat kid not eating anything at a candy store.

Originally posted by: Yossarian
think of it this way. if you had a gf and she was spending the night at some dude's house, cuddling and sleeping in his bed, wouldn't that feel like she was cheating on you?

Fully agreed. I would never let my gf do that, and if she did she'd be gone. But it is because I wouldn't trust her that she was telling me the truth. "Sure you didn't do anything!" I would find it hard to believe.

In this case, though, that IS the truth. See the difficulties in drawing the lines here?

 

Originally posted by: GrantMeThePower

Originally posted by: Sudheer Anne
um sleeping over at some other dude's house is cheating in my book. if my girl ever tried that she'd be kicked to the curb. i trust women like i trust a fat kid not eating anything at a candy store.

Originally posted by: Yossarian
think of it this way. if you had a gf and she was spending the night at some dude's house, cuddling and sleeping in his bed, wouldn't that feel like she was cheating on you?

Fully agreed. I would never let my gf do that, and if she did she'd be gone. But it is because I wouldn't trust her that she was telling me the truth. "Sure you didn't do anything!" I would find it hard to believe.

In this case, though, that IS the truth. See the difficulties in drawing the lines here?

So if your girlfriend formed a deep and lasting emotional connection to another man and began to spend the night at his house and played footsie with him and he got a boner while they slept in his bed, you wouldn't be concerned?

Face it...she's cheating with you.

 

[GrantMeThePower]

Originally posted by: jumpr

Originally posted by: GrantMeThePower

Originally posted by: Yossarian
for all intents and purposes she is already cheating on her bf with you, so you may as well fvck her.

I believe that you are the second person to have said something to that extent. How is what she is doing cheating, in your book? I am actually curious, because I've wondered that myself in the past two days.

She has formed an intimate emotional relationship with you. It doesn't matter that you two haven't kissed or physically had relations. The fact that you slept in the same bed with her knowing that she has strong feelings for you means that you catalyzed her cheating.

Don't get caught up in technicalities. Cheating is often achieved by relationships that never turn sexual.

Really? You think that it is cheating even without getting sexual?

Here's this question for you and others-

I think if a gf hooks up with another girl, it is cheating (hot, yes, but still cheating and I wouldn't be okay with it w/o being informed first and allowed to set up the camera). BUT, is it cheating, in your book, if she and another girl form an "intimate emotional relationship"?

 

[Yossarian]

you left out the part where I wrote her "tight little ass" don't do that.

 

[GrantMeThePower]

Originally posted by: jumpr

Originally posted by: GrantMeThePower

Originally posted by: Sudheer Anne
um sleeping over at some other dude's house is cheating in my book. if my girl ever tried that she'd be kicked to the curb. i trust women like i trust a fat kid not eating anything at a candy store.

Originally posted by: Yossarian
think of it this way. if you had a gf and she was spending the night at some dude's house, cuddling and sleeping in his bed, wouldn't that feel like she was cheating on you?

Fully agreed. I would never let my gf do that, and if she did she'd be gone. But it is because I wouldn't trust her that she was telling me the truth. "Sure you didn't do anything!" I would find it hard to believe.

In this case, though, that IS the truth. See the difficulties in drawing the lines here?

So if your girlfriend formed a deep and lasting emotional connection to another man and began to spend the night at his house and played footsie with him and he got a boner while they slept in his bed, you wouldn't be concerned?

Face it...she's cheating with you.

I would totally be concerned. If I knew all of that, it would be enough for me to call of the relationship. BUT it wouldn't because she cheated it would be because i would be unable to trust her NOT cheating at some point.

 

[GrantMeThePower]

Originally posted by: Yossarian
you left out the part where I wrote her "tight little ass" don't do that.

LOL! You're right, and you have my sincerest apologies. Wont happen again!

 

Originally posted by: GrantMeThePower

Originally posted by: jumpr
So if your girlfriend formed a deep and lasting emotional connection to another man and began to spend the night at his house and played footsie with him and he got a boner while they slept in his bed, you wouldn't be concerned?

Face it...she's cheating with you.

I would totally be concerned. If I knew all of that, it would be enough for me to call of the relationship. BUT it wouldn't because she cheated it would be because i would be unable to trust her NOT cheating at some point.

So you think that you can do ANYTHING YOU WANT with a girl, but it's not cheating until you put your penis in her vagina or she puts your penis in her mouth and moves it in an up-and-down motion? That's pretty naive of you.

 

[GrantMeThePower]

Originally posted by: jumpr

Originally posted by: GrantMeThePower

Originally posted by: jumpr
So if your girlfriend formed a deep and lasting emotional connection to another man and began to spend the night at his house and played footsie with him and he got a boner while they slept in his bed, you wouldn't be concerned?

Face it...she's cheating with you.

I would totally be concerned. If I knew all of that, it would be enough for me to call of the relationship. BUT it wouldn't because she cheated it would be because i would be unable to trust her NOT cheating at some point.

So you think that you can do ANYTHING YOU WANT with a girl, but it's not cheating until you put your penis in her vagina or she puts your penis in her mouth and moves it in an up-and-down motion? That's pretty naive of you.

Well, that is correct (to an extent). Kissing, in my book is cheating. Obviously so are the things you named. However, that is because of my definition of cheating. If you read my reply, though, you'll see that I said that I would NOT be okay with it and would end the relationship, even though she hadn't cheated yet.

 

[MX2]

Originally posted by: GrantMeThePower

Ends up she has a boyfriend and would never cheat
She spent the night and was very physical with me, but nothing happened.

Umm.....so you are lying to yourself or us??? If she was physical...then something happened.

 

Originally posted by: GrantMeThePower

Originally posted by: jumpr

Originally posted by: GrantMeThePower

Originally posted by: jumpr
So if your girlfriend formed a deep and lasting emotional connection to another man and began to spend the night at his house and played footsie with him and he got a boner while they slept in his bed, you wouldn't be concerned?

Face it...she's cheating with you.

I would totally be concerned. If I knew all of that, it would be enough for me to call of the relationship. BUT it wouldn't because she cheated it would be because i would be unable to trust her NOT cheating at some point.

So you think that you can do ANYTHING YOU WANT with a girl, but it's not cheating until you put your penis in her vagina or she puts your penis in her mouth and moves it in an up-and-down motion? That's pretty naive of you.

Well, that is correct (to an extent). Kissing, in my book is cheating. Obviously so are the things you named. However, that is because of my definition of cheating. If you read my reply, though, you'll see that I said that I would NOT be okay with it and would end the relationship, even though she hadn't cheated yet.

Okay, here is my problem. I think it is incredibly naive and stupid for you to believe that cheating is SOLELY a physical phenmenon. You can cheat emotionally, even if you haven't kissed someone.

 

[Anubis]

how big is her BF?

if he can kick yoru ass then no
if you coudl kick his ass, then go for it

seeing as she was "very physicial" with you she allready isnt being the most faithfull person in the world,
she woudl be at fault just as much as you woudl be for breaking up her relationship

 

[GrantMeThePower]

Originally posted by: MX2times

Originally posted by: GrantMeThePower

Ends up she has a boyfriend and would never cheat
She spent the night and was very physical with me, but nothing happened.

Umm.....so you are lying to yourself or us??? If she was physical...then something happened.

I didn't want to get too specific, so I had hoped to make it clear that she was physical with me in the sense of our legs intertwined, arms around each other, her head on chest, touching eachothers hair, etc, etc, but NO kissing, neckidness or true sexual encounters took place. I'm sorry for the confusion and lack of proper explanation.

 

[stars]

Her spending time with you without her current boyfriend knowing is cheating. If she would do that to him she would do the same to you. Enjoy the sex if it leads to that otherwise don't get caught up in what she appears to be.

 

[GrantMeThePower]

Originally posted by: Anubis
how big is her BF?

if he can kick yoru ass then no
if you coudl kick his ass, then go for it

seeing as she was "very physicial" with you she allready isnt being the most faithfull person in the world,
she woudl be at fault just as much as you woudl be for breaking up her relationship

I've never met him but she said he's my height but about 15 lbs lighter. He's an emo kid that isn't very physically active. Pretty sure i'd wipe the floor with him. But that isn't the important part of the discussion.

 

Originally posted by: GrantMeThePower
I didn't want to get too specific, so I had hoped to make it clear that she was physical with me in the sense of our legs intertwined, arms around each other, her head on chest, touching eachothers hair, etc, etc, but NO kissing, neckidness or true sexual encounters took place. I'm sorry for the confusion and lack of proper explanation.

WTF? And you don't consider that cheating? :disgust:

 

[Anubis]

Originally posted by: GrantMeThePower

Originally posted by: Anubis
how big is her BF?

if he can kick yoru ass then no
if you coudl kick his ass, then go for it

seeing as she was "very physicial" with you she allready isnt being the most faithfull person in the world,
she woudl be at fault just as much as you woudl be for breaking up her relationship

I've never met him but she said he's my height but about 15 lbs lighter. He's an emo kid that isn't very physically active. Pretty sure i'd wipe the floor with him. But that isn't the important part of the discussion.

eh it sure coudl be, if you/her decided to get together and she broke up with him and he kicked your ass, im pretty sure you wouldent be happy

 

[GrantMeThePower]

Originally posted by: stars
Her spending time with you without her current boyfriend knowing is cheating. If she would do that to him she would do the same to you. Enjoy the sex if it leads to that otherwise don't get caught up in what she appears to be.

You know, that is an interesting point. I don't know what/how much she does tell him. She said, on maybe the third time we hung out, that she and her boyfriend kind of got in a tiff about me because he was worried, and she told him not to worry that we were just friends and stuff. For all i know, she's told him everything!

 

[thelanx]

She is confused for many reasons probably, she doesn't know if she should end her relationship and be with you or not, and she probably doesn't know what you think about you too. I think the best thing is to talk to her and let her know that you are having these feelings, but that you don't think a relationship will work out. Good communication is the best thing you can engage in right now.