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What kind of activities do 12 year old girls like?

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vec said:
Agree with other regarding being alone with her. With my daughter it was ok, but with her friends, I made sure someone else was always with us.
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This is silly. though i admit depends on the kids.

Nothing is going to happen (well unless you are a sicko) any more then if you are alone with a boy.

I have been alone with a few of my daughters friends. I am a emergency contact on 3 different families.

Its how YOU act and how the KIDS are.
 
If MTV tells me anything, it's that she'd like to wear plastic underwear and grind her junk on some guy in a striped suit?
 
waggy said:
This is silly. though i admit depends on the kids.

Nothing is going to happen (well unless you are a sicko) any more then if you are alone with a boy.

I have been alone with a few of my daughters friends. I am a emergency contact on 3 different families.

Its how YOU act and how the KIDS are.
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I am not a sicko, and I believe I act in a responsible manner with preteens. I also am on an emergency contact list for different families. My concern is this is a very litigious society and one should be cautious in all instances.
 
vec said:
I am not a sicko, and I believe I act in a responsible manner with preteens. I also am on an emergency contact list for different families. My concern is this is a very litigious society and one should be cautious in all instances.
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cautious is one thing. being flat out insane is another. There is no need to have no private contact with a child you know. it's good for kids to have adult in their life besides family.

If its a child i know i never think twice about being alone with them (or the parents think twice about it) a few of them i even get hugs from (GASP! physical contact!)

granted a child i don't know i don't touch, or be alone with. but the idea that you can't be alone with a pre-teen girl is silly.
 
Don't you have enough of your own problems to be worrying about?

I know you have good intentions but remember, no good deed goes unpunished.

You are getting into a big mess.

Also, good guy ALWAYS ends up getting hurt in the end......

Ask me how I know.

Good luck
 
waggy said:
cautious is one thing. being flat out insane is another. There is no need to have no private contact with a child you know. it's good for kids to have adult in their life besides family.

If its a child i know i never think twice about being alone with them (or the parents think twice about it) a few of them i even get hugs from (GASP! physical contact!)

granted a child i don't know i don't touch, or be alone with. but the idea that you can't be alone with a pre-teen girl is silly.
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There is plenty of people out there who will accuse you of sexual assault if they don't like you. I would be careful if I was you.
 
Lazarus52980 said:
First, a little background:

My wife made friends with a lady she works with that is going through a hard time financially right now. We have been trying to help her and her soon to be 12 year old daughter by helping them with food, household stuff, and spiritual guidance for about the last 6 months or so.

The daughter has been gone for the summer visiting her father, and just came back a few days ago. The father drove her back from Chicago and was going to stay with the mom for a few days before returning. Unfortunately, an argument between the mother and father took place this morning that ended with the father choking the mother while slamming her head against the mirror in the bathroom repeatedly while the daughter looked on. Police were called, and the father left before they showed up. Since he does not live in the area, I don't think he will be seen again soon.

This brings me to the point: I had already been trying to be something of a father figure to this young girl, but given how she just saw he biological father behave, I feel the need to step up my efforts of trying to provide a better example of masculinity for her. Her birthday is coming up next week, and it happens to fall on a day when I have the evening free. I am intending to offer to do something with her for her birthday, but since my children are quite a bit younger (my oldest daughter is only 6) I am not sure what 12 year olds like to do... My current thought is to take her to Nickelodeon Universe at the Mall of America and go on the roller coasters and rides she would want. We could then go and get her nails and/or makeup done or other "tween" stuff like that.

Is that stuff that real kids like to do? Can anyone give me any advice on this please?
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Have a seat. You are taking your wife with you right????

hansen_story_2.jpg
 
Hugo Drax said:
Why is your wife or her mom not going with you? Why does it have to be just yourself and this child?
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Her mother was/is invited, but depending on what we do, I do not have enough money to pay for her too (if we did the rock/wall climbing or the amusement park stuff). My wife would likely not be coming because she needs to be home with the kids...(7,6,5, and 1) plus we might have another foster placement by then, that is always up in the air.

See posts 19 and 46 about doing stuff in groups. I hadn't considered trying to put a party together until it was mentioned. I didn't get a chance to talk to her mom tonight, so hopefully tomorrow I can do that and see what I can arrange for the trampoline park.

The one on one stuff is now only if the party thing falls through, or is too expensive.
 
Lazarus, the girl is not only missing a father figure, she's also missing a functional family. As others have suggested, you don't have to make it harder on yourself and herself by taking her on by herself. You have kids and a family. Have her be free to accompany you all or not on whatever you're up to, and you will do her a great deal of good -- just seeing a functioning family and a father who cares about them. Invite her mother too of course so that everyone's involved. The more the merrier, and kids like to be with kids.
 
the greatest ability is availability

whatever her interests, i can guarantee that she doesn't want to be hanging around with random old dude

i would focus less on 'doing something' and simply being available to help (shuttling to soccer practice or whatever) and by making your home an inviting place to visit/stay/hangout.

If you could even let her have her own room that might be good
 
Tell her that you love her. In a special way, too.

But tell her not to tell her mother that, they can get freaky.
 
mizzou said:
stay the fuck out of their relationship drama
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There are a lot of kids w/o appropriate help regarding family problems. In many cases they end up with many problems as adults. Especially if they inherited some special personality from at least one of the parents, e.g. ADHD.
 
Some kind of a trip or party for her and her friends? The point is, kids aged + usually dislike gifts they didn't choose by themselves (with exclusion of the newest electronics ofc).
 
It's different for each twelve year old girl. Lots of girls like scrapbooking and reading and art, but lots of girls like sports and outdoorsy things. When I was about 12 I like dance.
 
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