The year was 1489, the black plague ravaged the continent. It was the hour of the infamous auto defeat where for public amusement heretics and non believers were tortured ina carnival like atmosphere. And it was guided by the most fearful spector, to sit in judgement over good and evil, the grand inquisitor, Torquemada.
All pay heed, now enters his holiness, Torquemdada, the grand Inquisitor of the Spanish Inquisition.
Torquemada, do not impore him for compassion,
Torquemada, do not beg him for forgiveness,
Torquemada, do not ask him for mercy,
Let's face it, you can't talk 'em out of anything
Let all those who wish to confess their evil ways
And to except and embrace the true church, Convert now or forever burn in Hell,
For now begins the Inquisition,
The Inquisition, let's begin,
The Inquisition, look out sin,
We have our mission to convert the Jews
(Je,Je,Je,Je,Je,Je,Jews...)
We're gonna teach them, wrong from right
We're gonna help them, see the light
And make an offer they can't refuse,
(That the Jews just can't refuse)
Confess, don't be boring
Say yes (say yes) don't be dull
A fact, you're ignoring,
It's better to lose your skull cap than your skull
(oy oy gevalt)
the Inquisition, what a show
The Inquisition, here we go,
We know you're wishing that we'd go away
But the Inquisition is here and it's here to stay
The Inquisition, oh the fun
The Inquisition, what a joy
The Inquisition, oy oy oy
I was sitting in a temple,
I was minding my own business,
I was listening to a lovely Hebrew mass,
Then these papist plunge in,
And they throw me in the dungeon,
And they shove a red hot poker up my ass,
Is that considerate? Is that polite?
And not a tube of preparation H in sight!
I was sitting flickin chickens,
And I'm lookin through the pickins,
And suddenly the goys break down my walls,
I didnt even know them,
And they grabbed me by the scrotum,
And started playing ping-pong with my balls!
Oy the agony, oh the shame,
To make my privates public for a game?
The Inquisitions, what a show,
The Inquisitions, here we go,
We know you're wishing that we'd go away
But the Inquisition's here and it's here to
Hey torqumada, whaddya say?
I just got back from the auto-de-fe
Auto-de-fe? what's the auto-de-fe?
It's what you oughten't to do, but you do anyway
Skit skat and voddley cat and toodlee de day
Will you convert? No, no, no, no
Will you confess? No, no, no, no
Will you revert? No, no, no, no
Will you say yes? No, no, no, no
Now I ask in a nice way, I've said pretty please, I've bent their ears, now I'll work on their knees!
Hey Torquemada, walk this way,
We gotta little game that you might want to play, So pull that handle, try your luck,
Who knows, Torq, you might win a buck, alright.
Put it in the car, (in the car)
How we doin' - any converts today?
Not a one, nay, nay, nay
We've flattened their fingers,
We've branded their buns,
nothing is working,
Send in the nuns,
(instrumental)
Oi!
The Inquisition, what a show,
The Inquisition, here we go,
We know you're wishing, that we'd go away
So come you Muslims and you Jews,
We've got good news for all of yous,
you better change your point of views, today,
'Cause the Inquisition's here and it's here to stayyy......
OHHH! I thought you said Torquemada!