What is a wedding for an athiest couple like?

[bennylong]

go to a Chinese wedding. I have been to more than 30 chinese wedding, never any mention of god, no matter what their religions are.

 

[JulesMaximus]

Originally posted by: Madwand1
I hear of so many people fretting about having a conventional religious wedding in a suitable location with the maximum of appearances, etc., and even struggling to meet the religous requirements for such cases even when it goes against their own beliefs and practices. I wouldn't want my wedding to be so hypocritical. I'd rather have a rubber stamp ceremony in a civic institution with a minimum of attendees.

If I had married a Zen Buddhist who insisted on a full-blown Zen Buddhist wedding (whatever that would be; here I'm using Zen Buddhist just as an ironic stand-in for any religion), I'm not sure what I would have done. Not getting married would have been an option if I found the ceremony to be too counter to my personal beliefs. This probably would have been best. Taking the point of view that it was just another flawed ritual (IMO) which would make my wife happy would have been an option -- to a point. I have a broadly "religious" point of view although I'm sure it differs from probably all conventional religions, so I could have relied on that perspective, and used it towards tolerance -- to a point.

What actually happened in my case was as follows. The local city hall rent an official service allocated us a priest. He came up with a conventional semi-religious address. In response, I wrote my own address, which essentially lectured the priest, and gave my broader point of view on the subject. The priest, to my gratitude, delivered that address without embellishment, and without argument (although I might have enjoyed such a discussion, I would not have enjoyed a fight being a part of the memory of that event).

I didn't fret about it at all. My wife wanted to be married in the church we were married in. I didn't give a fvck one way or the other. I would have been happy driving to Vegas to get married, in fact, I proposed this at one point when things were getting stressful in regards to the planning.

I don't consider it hypocritical at all.

I think if there were a bunch of hoops the church made us jump through to be married there I would have had a problem with it but they didn't. My Mother-In-Law gave us far more trouble than anything...

 

[MrsBugi]

My MIL and FIL were married in a courthouse with a judge and a witness.

 

[0roo0roo]

Originally posted by: Turin39789

Originally posted by: Leros
I've seen a Christian marry a Christian and have a Christian wedding.
I've seen a Jew marry a Christian and have Jewish wedding.
I've seen an athiest marry a Christian and have a Christian wedding.

But what happens when an atheist marries an athiest? I mean, certainly its nice to have a wedding with a ceremony. Surely with the number of athiest people on this board, somebody has seen or been in this situation.

When the athiest and the christian marry and have a christian wedding, do they just hide the atheist's views from the priest conducting the ceremony?

Or does the priest sign off on it and just remove god from the atheists vows?

its more traditional than religious. like how many nonreligious or religious people of other religions celebrate christmas.

 

[KarenMarie]

An atheist wedding is where the bride and groom make a vow in front of a representitive of the government instead of a representitive of God.

 

[Madwand1]

Originally posted by: 0roo0roo
its more traditional than religious. like how many nonreligious or religious people of other religions celebrate christmas.

OK, I'll grant you that. In a recent election a church was the local voting hall, so going there by itself cannot say anything about your religous affiliation; some churches also serve as a "function hall" as OrganizedChaos said.

Yet on the other hand, some churches are certainly using this "tradition" as a lever to further their own dogma, so it's more than that in some cases.

Eloping is an even older tradition I'd say, and IMO is romantic. Vegas sounds cheap, and I wouldn't want it as such, but in such cases the ends are greater than the means.

 

[Madwand1]

Originally posted by: Perknose
It could, but will most likely take place in a bowling alley.

Atheists bowl, it's a kown fact, and they take the game very, very seriously.

Lacking belief in an ominpotent, omnipresent deity, bowling -- the game, the setting, the shoes -- is the central existential anchor in most atheist's lives.

It takes balls to be an atheist (and to bowl).

While I was enjoying this post, my young son came up to me and said something like "can you put the bowling in a triangle for me, pleeaase?". My first thought was "dammit, he's going to be an atheist!". Second thought -- OK, I'll set them up, etc. Third thought -- clearly this is evidence of the supernatural -- if it isn't then I don't know what is!

 

[MrPickins]

My wife and I are both agnostic. We just went for a non-sectarian wedding. No mention of god, but maybe a mention of "eternity", I forget.

As for location, if you're gonna elope, do it in style! We had ours on the beach In the USVI.

Originally posted by: Syringer
The question is, in countries where it's legal, where do gay religious couples get married?

One of my very good friends is lesbian; she and her partner had a "civil union" cereremony not long ago. It was in a church, and the ceremony was very traditional (well, except a few of the bridesmaids in tuxes). The reception was crazy fun. :evil:

 

[eits]

it's probably very similar to a gay marriage, except there's nobody protesting with signs and hatered.

 

[Jeff7]

Originally posted by: Leros
I've seen a Christian marry a Christian and have a Christian wedding.
I've seen a Jew marry a Christian and have Jewish wedding.
I've seen an athiest marry a Christian and have a Christian wedding.

But what happens when an atheist marries an athiest? I mean, certainly its nice to have a wedding with a ceremony. Surely with the number of athiest people on this board, somebody has seen or been in this situation.

I've seen a house fly. I've even seen a dragon fly.

I've seen a peanut stand. I've seen a rubber band!


Sorry, it's the first thing I thought of when I started reading this thread.


Atheist couples can get married with a big ceremony, all they really need is for a Justice of the Peace to be there.

Originally posted by: EKKC
satan comes to the party and burns everyone involved for eternity.

<puts on flame suit>

Not quite. The party just doesn't really start until he gets there though.

(FYI, atheists don't believe in Satan either.)

Originally posted by: krunchykrome

But can is it still done in a church?

I don't see why it couldn't be done in a church. I just assume you'd need permission from whoever owns the place.

Originally posted by: moshquerade
why would athiests "like the setting" that shows images and reverence to someone they don't believe in?

Why do people celebrate holidays involving things they know don't exist? Last I checked, the guy in the red suit and the bunny that hides eggs have been pretty much written off as being fictional characters. Maybe the building is still nice. And religions artwork can still have considerable aesthetic value. Some great skill can go into creating it.

Originally posted by: irishScott
Athiesm = God cannot exist! = We defy the laws of probability = stupid.
Religion = God exists! = We defy the laws of science and logic = stupid.

Agnosticism FTW!

*Puts on Uber Flame Suit and heads to P&N*

But yeah, typical wedding ceremony w/o mention of god.

Agnosticism! = Make up your damn mind already.
I guess I might qualify as agnostic. I understand that there is a slight, slight chance that there is a supernatural entity out there responsible for everything. But there's also a giant pumpkin behind the Moon that we just can't see. It might be there, but there's just no way to tell for sure.

FSM FTW!!!!

Originally posted by: eits
it's probably very similar to a gay marriage, except there's nobody protesting with signs and hatered.

Depends where you have the wedding. There are some incredibly crazy people out there, you've just got to know where to look.

 

[thoro86]

Simply a party without the word God around

 

[sourceninja]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: 777php
People who are Athiest have wedding in churches all the time, they do so because they like the setting and feel that it would provide for a beautiful ceremony. Some churches require that if you are not affiliated with their church that you take a few classes with them before you are allowed to have a wedding there.

In fact there are quite a few non-denominational churches that exist that will let anybody have a wedding there.

Couples that don't want a church wedding can have it anywhere they please; golf course, hotel, Japanese Tea Garden, etc.. they just hire an officiant to perform their ceremony.

why would athiests "like the setting" that shows images and reverence to someone they don't believe in?

Do I have to belive in greek mythology to enjoy it's artwork?

Maybe I like to LARP it now and then as well.

 

[dman]

Not all religious weddings are held in a church / place of worship. My sister got married in a nice outdoors setting at a place where the reception was also held. She had a priest perform the ceremony but an atheist couple could very easily have had someone else (notary, justice, ship captain, etc) perform the ceremony without referring to god.

 

[shadow9d9]

We aren't atheist, but aren't religious... we had a justice of the peace do it.. and it took place on the beach.