Sheepathon
Diamond Member
My wife and I have been together for many years now, and for the most part, we have had a happy marriage. We have a daughter together, and she brings all manners of joy into our lives.
However, like many other marriages, some of the "flame" has gone from the relationship. What used to be romantic evenings out followed by "bedroom antics" until the crack of dawn has been replaced with the two of us rarely even going to bed at the same hour.
Seeing that this forum is predominantly male, I'll assume that you people will understand my growing anxiety and malcontent. However, I need to take the needs of my wife into consideration, as well. She is a busy individual, like me, and fatigue is a perfectly plausible explanation for her recent spell of being less than eager to engage in intimate relations with me.
So, I recorded a video to a VHS tape on one of the rare nights that we were intimate. This way, I could satisfy my own needs and not violate the trust of our relationship. I assume most of you know what I mean by "satisfy my own needs." Choke my waffle, ruffle my papers, blend my protein shake, whatever.
However, one night as I was viewing this fine piece of amateur video, my wife came home early, and was infuriated by the fact that I had made the video. Not wanting to offend her, I gave her the tape, and assured her that it was the only copy. She proceeded to rip up the tape, and now she refuses to even speak to me.
So, I called my lawyer to get the proper divorce papers. I'm walking out of this relationship and going to In'N'Out Burger. BRB.
Dammit, I asked for no tomato slices on my cheeseburger. There they are. This is such a bad week. I mean, I hate disputes with my wife. I hate having to answer awkward questions from my daughter even more. But I fcking HATE TEH TOMATOES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
p.s. Fruity Pebbles > Lucky Charms
However, like many other marriages, some of the "flame" has gone from the relationship. What used to be romantic evenings out followed by "bedroom antics" until the crack of dawn has been replaced with the two of us rarely even going to bed at the same hour.
Seeing that this forum is predominantly male, I'll assume that you people will understand my growing anxiety and malcontent. However, I need to take the needs of my wife into consideration, as well. She is a busy individual, like me, and fatigue is a perfectly plausible explanation for her recent spell of being less than eager to engage in intimate relations with me.
So, I recorded a video to a VHS tape on one of the rare nights that we were intimate. This way, I could satisfy my own needs and not violate the trust of our relationship. I assume most of you know what I mean by "satisfy my own needs." Choke my waffle, ruffle my papers, blend my protein shake, whatever.
However, one night as I was viewing this fine piece of amateur video, my wife came home early, and was infuriated by the fact that I had made the video. Not wanting to offend her, I gave her the tape, and assured her that it was the only copy. She proceeded to rip up the tape, and now she refuses to even speak to me.
So, I called my lawyer to get the proper divorce papers. I'm walking out of this relationship and going to In'N'Out Burger. BRB.
Dammit, I asked for no tomato slices on my cheeseburger. There they are. This is such a bad week. I mean, I hate disputes with my wife. I hate having to answer awkward questions from my daughter even more. But I fcking HATE TEH TOMATOES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
p.s. Fruity Pebbles > Lucky Charms
