What everyone needs to know about toilet paper.

[dennilfloss]

Read and learn. It will change your life! 😉

http://home.nycap.rr.com/useless/toilet_paper/

 

[ConstipatedVigilante]

All that reading for that horrible, horrible story about Johnny Carson? I hate you.

 

[dennilfloss]

Originally posted by: ConstipatedVigilante
I hate you.

Damn! There are now three of you!:shocked:

 

[Chaotic42]

+5 if you printed this out and read it on the toilet.
+10 if you wiped with the printout.

 

[JS80]

that was a great read.

I average 4 TP per tear
I wipe from ballside to back
I do look at the paper after wipe
I fold
I have not wiped with leaves
I have not wiped with hands
I have not wiped with money

 

[Baked]

Just buy one of those toilets that squirt and blow dry.

 

[yhelothar]

2% have wiped with money!

:hurls chunks;

I must also thank the author for doing all that research on the history of arse wiping.. good read

 

[sindows]

If you go to Europe, toilet paper is what we call tissue paper in the states. They also don't come in rolls. They are precut with each sheet about the size of two business cards.

 

[I4AT]

When they say average tear, does that mean people pull out 5.9 sheets of TP per wipe, or total? I pull 1 sheet at a time and wipe until there's nothing there... in case anyone was wondering.

 

[nonameo]

some leaves are fuzzy and might do an OK job wiping.

 

[dennilfloss]

Originally posted by: JS80
that was a great read.

I average 4 TP per tear
I wipe from ballside to back
I do look at the paper after wipe
I fold
I have not wiped with leaves
I have not wiped with hands
I have not wiped with money

What about the three seashells?😀

 

[dennilfloss]

Originally posted by: I4AT
When they say average tear, does that mean people pull out 5.9 sheets of TP per wipe, or total? I pull 1 sheet at a time and wipe until there's nothing there... in case anyone was wondering.

You wipe with one sheet at a time? Is your arse the size of GI Joe's?:shocked:

 

[dennilfloss]

Originally posted by: nonameo
some leaves are fuzzy and might do an OK job wiping.

Spruce branches leave much to be desired, though you do get that fresh scent.

 

[JS80]

Originally posted by: dennilfloss

Originally posted by: JS80
that was a great read.

I average 4 TP per tear
I wipe from ballside to back
I do look at the paper after wipe
I fold
I have not wiped with leaves
I have not wiped with hands
I have not wiped with money

What about the three seashells?😀

I could never figure out the three seashells. Used my boxers and went commando.

 

[Dumac]

Originally posted by: JS80
that was a great read.

I average 4 TP per tear
I wipe from ballside to back
I do look at the paper after wipe
I fold
I have not wiped with leaves
I have not wiped with hands
I have not wiped with money

Wow, we match perfectly.

 

[JS80]

Originally posted by: Dumac

Originally posted by: JS80
that was a great read.

I average 4 TP per tear
I wipe from ballside to back
I do look at the paper after wipe
I fold
I have not wiped with leaves
I have not wiped with hands
I have not wiped with money

Wow, we match perfectly.

:highfive;

 

[Gimli43Orcs]

Originally posted by: JS80

Originally posted by: Dumac

Originally posted by: JS80
that was a great read.

I average 4 TP per tear
I wipe from ballside to back
I do look at the paper after wipe
I fold
I have not wiped with leaves
I have not wiped with hands
I have not wiped with money

Wow, we match perfectly.

:highfive;

right hand please

 

[funkymatt]

so, do you hang it overhand or underhand? simpsons can be quoted saying the overhand fashion is incorrect, but this seems to be the best way to hang it if it's covered, like in a public stall. at home, i don't actually pay attention while putting it on the holder.

 

[Atomic Playboy]

Originally posted by: funkymatt
so, do you hang it overhand or underhand? simpsons can be quoted saying the overhand fashion is incorrect, but this seems to be the best way to hang it if it's covered, like in a public stall. at home, i don't actually pay attention while putting it on the holder.

If you hang TP underhand, you should be dragged out in the street and shot. It is the single worst crime against humanity the world has ever known.

 

[I4AT]

Originally posted by: dennilfloss

Originally posted by: I4AT
When they say average tear, does that mean people pull out 5.9 sheets of TP per wipe, or total? I pull 1 sheet at a time and wipe until there's nothing there... in case anyone was wondering.

You wipe with one sheet at a time? Is your arse the size of GI Joe's?:shocked:

Yeah, I actually fold it too, so it's more like half a sheet. Do most people use 4-5 sheets at once?

 

[zinfamous]

I think I watched a "Modern Marvels" episode that was about toilet paper. that told me all that I need to know regarding said product

:thumbsup:

 

[Mo0o]

Hmm am I the only one that goes back to front?

 

[DefDC]

Originally posted by: Mo0o
Hmm am I the only one that goes back to front?

Nope. For women, that's bad.. But the manly men have nothing to fear! Back to front, all the way! (ok, maybe not ALL the way)



And, yes, hanging the roll so it drapes over the back is a crime against humanity!

 

[SirStev0]

Originally posted by: ConstipatedVigilante
All that reading for that horrible, horrible story about Johnny Carson? I hate you.

 

[waggy]

now i know more about TP then i ever wanted to.