What do you think? (sort of boy-girl relationship question)

MaximDude

Junior Member
Mar 18, 2001
4
0
0
i told a girl about my feeling...this is what i got in reply :


you're right i don't
really believe in the word forever anymore, got
tricked by it more than once. to tell you the truth...
i don't think that you can do anything to reassure me
that you won't let me down.
did you know that this is the first time that i am
receiving so called "love letters" on my computer?!
getting more high tech now.
to be straight forward... i am going to tell you
that the answer for now... i guess is no.... but no
one can predict what the future holds. so.. if you
don't want to waist your time with me... i'll
understand, i really reallyyyy... understand, i hope
there is no hard feelings, but i am really not
prepared for it right now, i don't think that i will
be prepared for it ever actually, so... maybe you
would like to go searching for another girl (this line
is so like the movies, don't you think?)



BTW, i have know her for quite a few years....we have been really good friend until last week i told her about my feeling. She said she needs times to think about it.....



What do you think? Do you still stand a chance at all? What should my reply be?
 

Emulex

Diamond Member
Jan 28, 2001
9,759
1
71
no chance dude. thats the standard "we're just going to be friend, probably never get in my pants" email.

You shouldn't be emailing that stuff, say it in person if you feel the vibes dude.

oh well chalk one up and walk on.
 

Monel Funkawitz

Diamond Member
Oct 12, 1999
5,105
0
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She is a worn out gutter slut. Find someone else, bro. That girl will break your heart, I'm telling you right now. I've heard that line enough to know.

Consider it done/over/kaput.
 

Mister T

Diamond Member
Feb 25, 2000
3,439
0
0
the game is afoot.

I may get flamed for this, but girls don't know what they want.
You need to convince them that you know what they want(need).

It took me a full 10 weeks until I had my woman into complete sumbmission. It was our 2 year anniversary on March 6th.

good luck.
 

Passions

Diamond Member
Feb 17, 2000
6,855
2
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ouch, the tone of her reply was pretty damn harsh in my opinon.

Crash and burn Maverick. Better luck next time my friend.
 

Scott Newton

Senior member
Oct 26, 1999
435
0
0
Everything I read sounds mostly like she is wanting you to slow down and see where things lead. "Maybe, For now, no one can predict....."

I would just leave this as a friendship for now and see what happens. Don't tie all of your resources in her because you might miss out on another catch. She knows how you feel so let her make the next move.

Whatever you do, don't change anything about the way you act towards or around her. What she sent you might have hurt and the natural instinct is to treat someone who hurts you differently, guarded. Don't treat her any differently than you have for the past few years.

Good luck and hope you letting her know about your feelings doesn't change the friendship structure.

 

j@cko

Diamond Member
Feb 13, 2000
3,814
0
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Well, if she says no, then that's a NO. Besides, she says she needs some time to think about it, why don't you let her think about it, and see...
 

Azraele

Elite Member
Nov 5, 2000
16,524
29
91
MaximDude: I think you've got a chance. She sounds very unsure of herself. Just give her room and take it slowly. I think she's afraid of liking you a lot and then getting hurt (<<i don't think that you can do anything to reassure me that you won't let me down>>). Give it a chance, but she's asking for that chance on her terms.
 

MaximDude

Junior Member
Mar 18, 2001
4
0
0
Azraele, that's what i thought too.
But i am not sure whether i am correct or not.....



thanks for the input guys....



anymore?
 

myputer

Golden Member
Feb 14, 2001
1,153
0
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It took me a full 10 weeks until I had my woman into complete sumbmission. It was our 2 year anniversary on March 6th.

Silly, her submission is just an illusion to make you feel good!


 

Zedfu

Senior member
Sep 26, 2000
473
0
0
MaximDude: it does sounds like there's still home in the air, but don't bank on it taking place any time soon, 'cause she wants to take it slowly if it's ever gonna happen. hey, don't let this friendship go to waste.
 

Yo Ma Ma

Lifer
Jan 21, 2000
11,635
2
0


<< but i am really not
prepared for it right now, i don't think that i will
be prepared for it ever actually, so... maybe you
would like to go searching for another girl
>>

This is a basic &quot;no&quot; with a little bit of &quot;see what the future will hold&quot; to soften it. Put it out of your mind (as much as it is possible) and move on, if something mutual develops along the way then it will be a nice surprise for you.
 

Delusion2001

Banned
Feb 13, 2001
1,370
0
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i second scott newton

i was in your shoes. all i can say is don't read into things too much, and just take things SLOWLY. (that is the most important part)

good luck man. keep us posted
 

Champo41

Senior member
May 11, 2000
456
0
0
From her letter, it looks like A) she doesn't want a relationship right now or B) she doesn't want one with you.

How is your relationship now with this girl? Are you friends, good friends, or just met? If you're just friends, then move on. However, it might help if you just hung around for a while. Her saying that if you don't want to waste your time with her is just womanspeak for you to move on. It wouldn't be so apparent if she hadn't said &quot;I really understand&quot; a couple of times.

Again, it wouldn't hurt to still be her friend.
 

SuperGroove

Diamond Member
Dec 17, 1999
3,347
1
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The letter essentially means,


&quot;Come back to me when you're rich and can afford MAJOR reconstructive surgery&quot;

This line sticks out to me the most:


<< so.. if you
don't want to waist your time with me... i'll
understand, i really reallyyyy... understand
>>




I bet she's laughing when she says this...that or has a disgusted look on her face.


Paul
-Got told today that
A) I'm not attractive
B) I'm not physically fit(BS...tubby's calling me tubby. I lost 10lbs, and now I'm actually at a weight I should be at. STUPID!)
C) I'm not boyfriend material
D) I'm a nice guy
E) You know what they say, nice guys finish last.
F) You'll find someone else


Gal darned, mutha fuh...manchu. Dangit I HATE THIS! I bet she'd go out with me if I smoked around her even though she doesn't like it. I know she would like me if I had a nicer car. I know she is into looks, moreso than my humor. Stupid...STUPID! She personally told me she wished her boyfriend was like me. WTF does that make me? OH yea...I'm essentially the straight gay guy you just see in the movies. Gul darned!

Stupid STUPID STUPID!!
Sorry...:(
 

BlueScreenVW

Senior member
Sep 10, 2000
509
0
0
That answer can mean just about anything... Go ask her again (in person) if you really want her, or you'll regret it later. But, on the other hand, it might be easier to get her out on a movie date than immediate love eternal the first few weeks...

:)
 

Bluga

Banned
Nov 28, 2000
4,315
0
0
what about this (i wrote this to a girl):



<< First of all, Relax
¡§Hi Carol, haven't heard much from you recently, just want to check if you are doing allright, for now :)¡¨

I find it hard to believe that the above sentence makes you think that I¡¦m implying you are mean, if so, sorry for my choice of words. I¡¦m merely asking how have you been recently, a friendly conversation, if you will. Please don¡¦t misinterpret it.

And for the 99999th time :) , I've Never said you are NOT friendly, i've no clue why you would end up thinking that way, i guess you are really in a bad mood, sorry for my bad timing. Communication is very important (either by communicating how you feel to me or by altering the circumstances) If you feel like communicate your feelings clearly and honestly, please do so. I am not a mind reader, i can't read your mind unless you tell me. If you're not happy with the way things are going, then either do something about it or remove yourself from the situation altogether.

Once again, relax, don't get too serious :)
>>



and got this reply:



<< I got this from the last conversation we had in ICQ. >>



harsh eh?

I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE.

You are not alone MaximDude ;)
 

MaximDude

Junior Member
Mar 18, 2001
4
0
0
hey, thanks all for the input.
I really appreciate it! :)

Right now i think i will just be good friend of her as i used to be. We'll see what happen in the future. ;)

 

StageLeft

No Lifer
Sep 29, 2000
70,150
5
0
Definitely no chance reading that letter unfortunately. The only way to keep friendship I'd guess is to totally go back on it and appologize and tell her never to think of it again. It sucks :(
 

Plantanthera

Senior member
Jan 28, 2001
431
0
0
&quot;to tell you the truth...
i don't think that you can do anything to reassure me
that you won't let me down.&quot;


What she mean is NO Way in Hell that she is going to date you :(

i am going to tell you
that the answer for now... i guess is no.... but no
one can predict what the future holds.


Maybe she would date you if you have kool friends &amp; money, etc... in the near fulture.

so.. if you
don't want to waist your time with me... i'll
understand, i really reallyyyy... understand, i hope
there is no hard feelings, but i am really not
prepared for it right now, i don't think that i will
be prepared for it ever actually, so... maybe you
would like to go searching for another girl


Again she said no with the insulting &quot;i really reallyyyy...understand&quot; scentence.

In the letter you have 2 negative &amp; 1 maybe line, which equate to a big NO. Just read her letter closely and it will show you that she is not worth your time, because she is a bitch &amp; immature.

Good luck with finding a GF...There is a girl out there waiting for you, but you haven't notice her yet. (I had a friend that had a crush on me 2 years befor I noticed her. And, at her wedding, after 16 years of friendship she told me that she loved me all those years, but I was way too stupid to regcornize it)

 

MuffD

Diamond Member
May 31, 2000
6,027
0
0
Like it was mentioned up there. You should call her or talk to her in person instead of an e-mail as it seems so impersonal. She might take you a little more seriously then.