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What do project managers do in a nutshell?

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heh to be fair, half the time when pm's get the team together to determine what the tasks are, the team doesn't think things thoroughly either and promise they can do more than they can while spending their time sitting around bullshitting and drinking coffee, then looking for a technical "issue", usually on the day the task is due as an excuse to delay the completion date. incompetence goes both ways!

their job is to basically be the paperwork/communication nexus that is supposed to take some high level goal, break it down into actionable tasks with estimated timelines and costs, then document and communicate every minutiae of any conversation, email, thought, meeting, conference call, sample, test, etc.. that's related to the project in any sense.

from the worker standpoint, frequently they are viewed as time wasters due to the inordinate amount of meetings, requests for information, and status check pokes. "I know the task says it's going to be due soon but the red color isnt really a bad thing, i just need to have a good reason for why the task is late. red isnt bad, just make sure you have a really good excuse!"

from the business folks standpoint project managers provide a nice layer of separation between their role of vision/leadership (i'm the idea guy) and reality (making it happen) leading to a natural excuse of the idea was fine but it wasnt executed as well as we should have!

like any manager a good project manager is well organized, has a high to mid level understanding of what's going on, can navigate a few levels up in the organization for proper escalation, and should be able to see a few steps ahead of the current standing. they should be able to keep the folks doing the work with solid time frames and also manage expectations and scope creep from the customers to feasible limits. All while being as transparent as glass.. basically from reams and reams of documentation and communication.
 
This is something i have noticed. In my trade, i have found that they are usually under organised and blame their failures on the workers as much as they can get away with,

I basically stood up to one, eye balled him, and told him:

It is not my fucking job to organize your job.

was funny watching him piss his pants

Sick of civilians

You got that right....

I got laid off at my list job b/c of it. The PMs would always put the blame on me since I was the junior engineer. Yeah, it's my fault it went over budget because you think everything is a cut and paste job even though I warned you about it.

I still remember my first project ever at that job. I had no idea what I was doing and they all knew it. Yet, come project completion, I needed someone to check my work. I asked, no one offered. I told the PM that no one checked it, not even the project engineer who was supposed to be supervising me. He just goes, "well, needs to go out today". Come 1 month later, my part was change orders galore. There was a bunch of finger pointing, then the PM pointed at me. Man, I had a performance meeting....I almost broke down.

This kept happening over and over until we got this new PM. The new PM saw what was going on and just blasted the other PMs. That new PM was awesome. He eventually became my mentor for the next year and a half. Then, out of the blue, he sat me down one day. he talked about career goals and said, "If you ever want a different job, do not hesitate to get one....". that was the end of that conversation. I was kind of dumbfounded by it. 1 month later, he left the group. Starting at that day, the blame games started again. I was being blamed for stuff that was not my responsibility. 5 months later...I was canned.
 
That's a bad story Gibson, but sounds typical in many large corporations.

I decided to pursue the PMP because I finally threw my hands in the air and decided that I won't beat them, so I might as well join them. I've managed a lot of big projects and while the PMP training does have some good ideas and points, much of it is also busy work and a waste of time. I'm hoping to integrate the good parts into my practices and move on to bigger and better things without the investment and uncertainty of an MBA.
 
They know a little about a lot, USUALLY. And also make sure things are on track, and all parties are happy with the $$'s.
 
Professional babysitters. And they certainly aren't the most vapous waste of time in a business. That title belongs to black belts/six sigma.
 
My wife is a PM. She works in purchasing and logistics. She spends most of her time making sure shit(parts) gets where it need to be to build the product(fab machines) and fixing the screw ups of the buyers beneath her. Lots of meetings, lots of email, and lots of bitching. She is a doll though and her buyers LOVE her. They despise the other PM, a overly dominant asian girl who sounds a lot like what you guys are bitching about.
 
our PMs are six sigma black belts

Ours are in the same dept but have different goals. PM's are for rolling out or upgrading applications or physical projects. Six Sigma is about measuring processes and "improving" them.
 
Professional babysitters. And they certainly aren't the most vapous waste of time in a business. That title belongs to black belts/six sigma.

I don't mind the six sigma guys -- I've had some training in it and can see the value in certain areas. The ones I always laughed at were the "Lean" manufacturing guys. They'd strut around my old office as if they were more important than God himself and their contributions seemed limited to "Hey, if you move this table closer to this machine by 6", you'll save 20 seconds per part."
 
We used to lean. Now six sigma is the current buzz. The one I had to chuckle at was the Six Sigma analysis of the savings we would have by publishing an electronic version of a newsletter we would email to employees instead of actually printing it.

It turns out that email is in fact cheaper than paper printing!
 
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near as I can tell, they spend all day talking with each other about Dancing With the Stars, American Idol, etc while telling every other department how to do their job
 
A great project manager is someone who is a developer with leadership and communication skills. They are pretty critical IMO.
 
i often wondered why this job function exists?
isn't this is something our regular, daily manager should handle? instead, we hire a consultant PM who's probably getting paid $100+/hr.
 
i often wondered why this job function exists?
isn't this is something our regular, daily manager should handle? instead, we hire a consultant PM who's probably getting paid $100+/hr.

It's a lot easier to hate/fire a consultant than an existing manager. Consider it a survival mechanism by the rest of the management.
 
We create work breakdown schedules, communication plans, manage issues lists, monitor critical path and milestones and overall push the project along. A lot of that time that's by contacting the resource's boss and lighting a fire under the resources ass and burning them with an e-mail that's copied to their boss and their bosses boss.
 
i often wondered why this job function exists?
isn't this is something our regular, daily manager should handle? instead, we hire a consultant PM who's probably getting paid $100+/hr.

A regular/daily manager has their primary responsibilities and some do when they have time to do it. I manage up to 3 projects at the same time. Running meetings, putting together documentation, working with business uses and developers, etc would not leave me much time if I also had a regular job that I had to perform.
 
We create work breakdown schedules, communication plans, manage issues lists, monitor critical path and milestones and overall push the project along. A lot of that time that's by contacting the resource's boss and lighting a fire under the resources ass and burning them with an e-mail that's copied to their boss and their bosses boss.

You forgot earned value analysis. Tsk, tsk.....
 
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