What can I do to control my anxiety?

[Barfo]

So, about 2 hours ago my dad called me, he seemed to be on the verge of crying and told me he was feeling bad (he wouldn't elaborate even though I asked several times), he just made me write down his credit card numbers and told me where his emergency cash is stashed.

Now, this has happened at least 5 times in the last 7 years, the old man is sick but I don't think his time has come yet, but still I'm worried sick about him, I asked if I should pay him a visit when he called and then again 5 minutes ago when I called to check up on him but he turned me down, I already phoned an aunt that lives close to go check up on him but I don't know what else can I do, I'm feeling anxious as hell and I can't do anything but sit here and nef (sorry mods).

Any suggestions? (I'd rather not take any drugs though).

 

[Newbian]

/Fap

 

[krylon]

Call the cops

 

[Barfo]

Originally posted by: Newbian
/Fap

Still haven't lost my humor though everyone should know I'm serious in this thread.

 

[bobdole369]

In your current position - keep up to speed. Call him a lot, even doing the dreaded "girltalk" thing. You've already done the best thing - thats get a relative or friend to physically check on him. Just keep it up and hope it passes, or he seeks help.

 

[Barfo]

Originally posted by: krylon
Call the cops

How would that help? I've already called someone to check up on him.

 

[Modelworks]

Don't ask him if you should go see him. Just go.
People that are depressed often will not tell people to come over, they just want to be left alone, which is actually the worst thing you can do for them.
So cut off the pc and go see him.

 

[her209]

Is he single?

 

[Mr Smiley]

You should go see your father. I think that would be helpful for both of you.

 

[Mo0o]

You need to go see him and talk him out of whatever he's thinking. If you think he has plans all laid out, he needs to be hospitalized

 

[Barfo]

Originally posted by: bobdole369
In your current position - keep up to speed. Call him a lot, even doing the dreaded "girltalk" thing. You've already done the best thing - thats get a relative or friend to physically check on him. Just keep it up and hope it passes, or he seeks help.

How often should I call him? is 2 hour intervals too much? He said not to call or worry, though obviously I can't help it, I know it stresses him when I worry about him.

Originally posted by: Modelworks
Don't ask him if you should go see him. Just go.
People that are depressed often will not tell people to come over, they just want to be left alone, which is actually the worst thing you can do for them.
So cut off the pc and go see him.

It would take me 6 hours to get there, he already spoke to my aunt and they're going to the doctor soon, what's stopping me is that this has happened several times before and it turns out to be something minor, and besides, if it's just depression he's not the kind to do himself in.

Originally posted by: her209
Is he single?

Divorced.

 

[Modelworks]

Originally posted by: barfo

Originally posted by: Modelworks
Don't ask him if you should go see him. Just go.
People that are depressed often will not tell people to come over, they just want to be left alone, which is actually the worst thing you can do for them.
So cut off the pc and go see him.

It would take me 6 hours to get there, he already spoke to my aunt and they're going to the doctor soon, what's stopping me is that this has happened several times before and it turns out to be something minor, and besides, if it's just depression he's not the kind to do himself in.

So is he going to be there by himself until he goes to see a doctor ?
If so then he needs to go to someone else house or have someone stay with him.
Saying he isn't the type to do himself in is very dangerous thinking. There have been many people that attempted suicide that did so thinking what they were doing would not kill them probably but they end up dead anyway.

Depression is nothing to play with, especially if the person is calling you giving you their financial information. That usually means that they are considering suicide.

 

[cherrytwist]

Originally posted by: Mo0o
You need to go see him and talk him out of whatever he's thinking. If you think he has plans all laid out, he needs to be hospitalized

+1

 

[Barfo]

Originally posted by: Modelworks

Originally posted by: barfo

Originally posted by: Modelworks
Don't ask him if you should go see him. Just go.
People that are depressed often will not tell people to come over, they just want to be left alone, which is actually the worst thing you can do for them.
So cut off the pc and go see him.

It would take me 6 hours to get there, he already spoke to my aunt and they're going to the doctor soon, what's stopping me is that this has happened several times before and it turns out to be something minor, and besides, if it's just depression he's not the kind to do himself in.

So is he going to be there by himself until he goes to see a doctor ?
If so then he needs to go to someone else house or have someone stay with him.
Saying he isn't the type to do himself in is very dangerous thinking. There have been many people that attempted suicide that did so thinking what they were doing would not kill them probably but they end up dead anyway.

Depression is nothing to play with, especially if the person is calling you giving you their financial information. That usually means that they are considering suicide.

Last time I called him my aunt was coming down there, she should be there already though I can't reach her on her cell phone. There is no one else close by that could pay a visit.
The financial talk is not strange with my dad, we've been discussing financial matters lately since I'm his sole heir. Still, I'm calling to check on him soon, I just hate sitting here and biting my nails and I can't think of anything else to do.

 

[db]

"it's just depression".

Nothing "just" about it. Depression is serious. I'm talking about major recurrent depression.
His calling is the only thing he can think of. It lets off a little steam, but indicates how bad he feels.
Someone in his spot does not know what to do.
At the very least, it helps if he knows someone cares.
If he can't afford medical help, there are sliding scale and free places to get counseling.

But I repeat: He doesn't know what to do.
When you're in a situation like this, everything seems like a dead end, which prolongs the situation.

The older we get the more we get into set patterns of daily habits and thinking. Sometimes even a slight change can start to break the hold that
depression has. Something as simple as taking a walk. Doing something physical--for some reason--seems to help. A daily physical routine (doesn't have to be strenuous
or hard), especially outside, can be a real help.

 

[db]

"I can't think of anything else to do"

If you haven't already, call and say s/t like: "I just called to say: 'I love you'".

Perhaps you guys can plan a future event where you and he can get together to do something *simple but pleasant*. Basically,
just to spend a little time together. That gives him s/t to look forward and (once you get there) it's easy for both of you.

 

[Barfo]

Originally posted by: db
"I can't think of anything else to do"

If you haven't already, call and say s/t like: "I just called to say: 'I love you'".

Perhaps you guys can plan a future event where you and he can get together to do something *simple but pleasant*. Basically,
just to spend a little time together. That gives him s/t to look forward and (once you get there) it's easy for both of you.

Great idea, I was waiting for an hour to pass before calling again, I'll tell him that.

Thank you.

 

[Mani]

Just tell him you are coming by and are bringing a 6-pack (or something he enjoys) - something to take the pressure off the situation a bit. If there's to be any hope in this situation you have to find a way to get him to open up. Good luck.