Well, this just puts me at odds...

[Queasy]

Just a little history, I am white and my wife is black. We made the decision that she would stay at home with our son when he was born and that if she got a job it would either be a home-based business or telecommuting situation. This has worked out fairly well for us because paying ~$200 a week for daycare just doesn't make sense to me despite it now being a social norm.

Now, there is a group called Mocha Moms that my wife is joining that is basically a support group for 'women of color' that stay at home with their children. I find the mission admirable because it helps women get together to help each other and they also support home-schooling which I think is important given the state of public schools in Georgia - especially in the city of Atlanta. (We're saving to send our child to a private school).

However, my wife was going through their website and came across a 'history lesson' on why women of color need support that puts us at odd with the group. This history lesson kind of reminds me of Conspiracy Brother from Undercover Brother. The message is basically it is whitey's fault. I mean, yes slavery is a portion of our history and something that should never be forgotten but that has long since past and great strides have been made to the point where the black population (especially in Atlanta) is upwardly mobile.

One paragraph in this history lesson makes it sound like all white women have stayed at home and have had black house-maids. This couldn't be further from the truth...especially since women's suffrage and even moreso, WWII. I mean, let's be honest. It is the rich and the wealthy that have had house-maids...of all colors. The majority of white america from now back to the days of slavery has never had a house servant of any kind.

There are other portions of the 'history lesson' the gets me but I'm not going to make this an essay. But what puts me at odds is the last paragraph that says they welcome everyone of all racial and ethnic backgrounds. Well, how is that supposed to make my wife feel when you spent the last five paragraphs blaming white people for all social ills and she is married to a white man? How is that supposed to make the lady in the group who is white and adopted a black baby?

I just don't get it. Is racism erased? No. Is the world perfect? No. Is it important to remember the past? As long as it is accurate (which this history lesson isn't), yes. Is it necessary to carry the events of the past around as a chip on your shoulder? No.

Link to 'history lesson'

 

[Orsorum]

This is evident in the disproportionate number of black males in our nation?s jails

Wasn't there an actual study done in New Jersey that proved that this wasn't because of racism, but because *gasp* a disproportionate number of black males were committing crimes?

 

[Orsorum]

Miraculously however, many African-Americans have made great strides in the face of oppression and have managed to live above the poverty line. This ?success? has often come at a price though. While generations of white mothers enjoyed the privilege of being able to stay at home and spend time with their children, generations of black mothers lived and worked in the homes of these white women in order to earn money to feed their own children.

I would love to see any statistics or accounts backing this up. My mother has worked my entire life, as has most of the women in my family. We've never had a maid of any color, nor a housekeeper, or anything.

 

[Spoooon]

I think you're overreacting to the history lesson. Everything in it is basically true. Historically, women of color have had to work, as two "black" incomes (male and female) were typically required to come close to one "white" income (male). Either way, she should just join and if things get uncomfortable, she can always leave the group.

On the other hand, in the past it was considered sort of taboo for married white women to hold jobs.

 

[Ronstang]

Originally posted by: Orsorum

This is evident in the disproportionate number of black males in our nation?s jails

Wasn't there an actual study done in New Jersey that proved that this wasn't because of racism, but because *gasp* a disproportionate number of black males were committing crimes?

Yes.....but they are committing those crimes because of the racism shown towards them by the white man and thus it is actually not their fault but whitey's.

 

[Queasy]

Originally posted by: Spoooon
I think you're overreacting to the history lesson. Everything in it is basically true. Historically, women of color have had to work, as two "black" incomes (male and female) were typically required to come close to one "white" income (male). Either way, she should just join and if things get uncomfortable, she can always leave the group.

On the other hand, in the past it was considered sort of taboo for married white women to hold jobs.[/quote]

In the past, yes. But since WWII and the feminist movement of the late 60s and 70s, it is almost expected that women (of all colors) work. Women staying at home with their children is pretty close to being looked down on.

 

[Spoooon]

Originally posted by: Queasy

Originally posted by: Spoooon
I think you're overreacting to the history lesson. Everything in it is basically true. Historically, women of color have had to work, as two "black" incomes (male and female) were typically required to come close to one "white" income (male). Either way, she should just join and if things get uncomfortable, she can always leave the group.

On the other hand, in the past it was considered sort of taboo for married white women to hold jobs.

In the past, yes. But since WWII and the feminist movement of the late 60s and 70s, it is almost expected that women (of all colors) work. Women staying at home with their children is pretty close to being looked down on.[/quote]

Well, remember, that is a history lesson. It doesn't refer to what's happening today so much as events that have lead to the current situation. Again, I say just don't worry about it unless things get uncomfortable for your wife. In all liklihood, they are probably easy going ladies that aren't going to hate on your white ass.

 

[Monel Funkawitz]

Miraculously however, many African-Americans have made great strides in the face of oppression and have managed to live above the poverty line. This ?success? has often come at a price though. While generations of white mothers enjoyed the privilege of being able to stay at home and spend time with their children, generations of black mothers lived and worked in the homes of these white women in order to earn money to feed their own children.

That is because, and this is the hard truth, low income black mothers have more kids regardless of income status and most of them live in the big cities. Because of this, most of their kids do not have a marketable trade skill (like working on a farm, automotive skills, etc)

 

[Queasy]

Originally posted by: Spoooon

Well, remember, that is a history lesson. It doesn't refer to what's happening today so much as events that have lead to the current situation. Again, I say just don't worry about it unless things get uncomfortable for your wife. In all liklihood, they are probably easy going ladies that aren't going to hate on your white ass.

Umm...Isn't WWII up through the bra-burning feminist movement that spurred women into the workforce history?

The group by itself seems fine. She's friends with a few of the women already and they know me as well. I call one of them my second wife because she's over here all the time.

But, when the president of the organization makes such a conflicting message and sometimes inaccurate message it leaves me scratching my head.

 

[Imported]

Originally posted by: Ronstang

Originally posted by: Orsorum

This is evident in the disproportionate number of black males in our nation?s jails

Wasn't there an actual study done in New Jersey that proved that this wasn't because of racism, but because *gasp* a disproportionate number of black males were committing crimes?

Yes.....but they are committing those crimes because of the racism shown towards them by the white man and thus it is actually not their fault but whitey's.

I've been told that it's not really racism that affects the prison population, but rather low socioeconomic status.

 

[ObiDon]

Originally posted by: Queasy

Originally posted by: Spoooon

Well, remember, that is a history lesson. It doesn't refer to what's happening today so much as events that have lead to the current situation. Again, I say just don't worry about it unless things get uncomfortable for your wife. In all liklihood, they are probably easy going ladies that aren't going to hate on your white ass.

Umm...Isn't WWII up through the bra-burning feminist movement that spurred women into the workforce history?

The group by itself seems fine. She's friends with a few of the women already and they know me as well. I call one of them my second wife because she's over here all the time.

But, when the president of the organization makes such a conflicting message and sometimes inaccurate message it leaves me scratching my head.

At least your wife is intelligent enough to have more or less been offended by that crap. As long as they don't try to perpetuate those beliefs within the group. I wonder if the author of the "history lesson" attends the meetings. Perhaps you should sit in on one and see how it goes.

[Forrest Gump] "Sorry I ruined your Panther party." [/Forrest Gump]

 

[notfred]

How could you expect an organization that caters only to a specific racial group NOT to be racist in some ways?