Well this is it. Tonight I ask my GF to marry me

[chuckywang]

Originally posted by: gigapet

Originally posted by: chuckywang
Keep the prenup discussion out of this. Gigapet is a troll for just posting that one word. This is a happy time for the OP.

im a troll? Do a search for divorce in off-topic. Read all the horror stories yourself. Read the statistics. Its about being cautious now so you are not fvcked later. Of course its a happy time but its no excuse for being blind to things that can happen down the road. People change.

This is not a divorce thread. This is a thread about the OP proposing to his GF. Most people's initial reactions would be to congragulate the OP, not think about prenup. Of course prenups are something to think about, but he's not even engaged yet and his wedding is probably months away and this thread is not the place to talk about it.

 

[jalaram]

Originally posted by: chuckywang
You have my blessing. I hope you g/f doesn't read Anandtech!

I should've read this before I forwarded this thread to her. Doh!!

j/k

Good luck. Follow SouthPaw's advice and ignore all the prenup trolls.

BTW, are you going to tell your g/f about your obsession for your hefty co-workers?

 

[SouthPaW1227]

When my parents split,

You're coming from a completely different viewpoint. One that says "divorce is IMMINENT! WATCH OUT!!!!!!!" I'm terribly sorry that happened (I have 3 divorced couples within my extended family as well) but if you go into a marriage expecting to get divorced, why the hell are you doing it? And don't give me the "people change".

You say for better or worse, 'til death do us part FOR A REASON.

 

[gigapet]

Originally posted by: chuckywang

Originally posted by: gigapet

Originally posted by: chuckywang
Keep the prenup discussion out of this. Gigapet is a troll for just posting that one word. This is a happy time for the OP.

im a troll? Do a search for divorce in off-topic. Read all the horror stories yourself. Read the statistics. Its about being cautious now so you are not fvcked later. Of course its a happy time but its no excuse for being blind to things that can happen down the road. People change.

This is not a divorce thread. This is a thread about the OP proposing to his GF. Most people's initial reactions would be to congragulate the OP, not think about prenup. Of course prenups are something to think about, but he's not even engaged yet and his wedding is probably months away and this thread is not the place to talk about it.

thats a great opinion you have and I respect you more for sharing it.

 

[CVSiN]

Originally posted by: chowmein

Originally posted by: gigapet
Prenup

i second

I third..

 

[gigapet]

Originally posted by: SouthPaW1227

You say for better or worse, 'til death do us part FOR A REASON.

People say alot of things and don't mean it.

 

[JEDI]

pics?
prenup?
keeping your wife's backdoor open???

 

[AdamSnow]

Good luck man!!

Just do it - She will love it, and if she has no idea it's coming... it will be amazing to see the look on her face

 

[hypn0tik]

Originally posted by: gigapet

Originally posted by: SouthPaW1227

You say for better or worse, 'til death do us part FOR A REASON.

People say alot of things and don't mean it.

Then such people shouldn't get married in the first place.

 

[jpeyton]

Originally posted by: gigapet

Originally posted by: chuckywang
Keep the prenup discussion out of this. Gigapet is a troll for just posting that one word. This is a happy time for the OP.

im a troll? Do a search for divorce in off-topic. Read all the horror stories yourself. Read the statistics. Its about being cautious now so you are not fvcked later. Of course its a happy time but its no excuse for being blind to things that can happen down the road. People change.

Sorry, but I don't buy the pre-nup argument either. I'm sure for certain people (who are already very well off), a pre-nup is necessary to keep the gold-diggers away, but I don't think a pre-nup is necessary for EVERYONE who gets married.

You're trying to argue that 100% of divorces are messy ordeals, which is simply untrue. If you marry a reasonable person, chances are they won't strip you to the bone if things fall apart. My GF and I have already talked extensively about marraige, and divorce is the farthest thing from our mind. But we both know that we are reasonable people and we purposefully wouldn't hurt each other if anything went wrong.

I also agree with the OP. If a pre-nup is the first thing on your mind when getting married, you are instilling very little faith in your future marraige.

 

[gigapet]

Originally posted by: hypn0tik

Originally posted by: gigapet

Originally posted by: SouthPaW1227

You say for better or worse, 'til death do us part FOR A REASON.

People say alot of things and don't mean it.

Then such people shouldn't get married in the first place.

hollier than thou much ? :roll:

everyone lies to other people but mostly to themselves.

 

[Scouzer]

Originally posted by: hypn0tik

Originally posted by: gigapet

Originally posted by: SouthPaW1227

You say for better or worse, 'til death do us part FOR A REASON.

People say alot of things and don't mean it.

Then such people shouldn't get married in the first place.

You are incredibly naive.

50% of marriages end in failure, 50% of people aren't idiots.

you cant see the future

 

[K1052]

Originally posted by: SouthPaW1227

When my parents split,

You're coming from a completely different viewpoint. One that says "divorce is IMMINENT! WATCH OUT!!!!!!!" I'm terribly sorry that happened (I have 3 divorced couples within my extended family as well) but if you go into a marriage expecting to get divorced, why the hell are you doing it? And don't give me the "people change".

You say for better or worse, 'til death do us part FOR A REASON.

First of all, congrats to the OP.


A prenuptial is something to seriously consider and I certainly won't criticise people who feel they need one with the "If you even consider it you are already giving up on the marrige" line. Sh!t happens. I don't pay for fire insurance because I WANT my house to burn to the ground, instead I prefer to be prepared should the worst happen however unlikely that may seem at the time.

 

[gigapet]

Originally posted by: jpeyton

Originally posted by: gigapet

Originally posted by: chuckywang
Keep the prenup discussion out of this. Gigapet is a troll for just posting that one word. This is a happy time for the OP.

im a troll? Do a search for divorce in off-topic. Read all the horror stories yourself. Read the statistics. Its about being cautious now so you are not fvcked later. Of course its a happy time but its no excuse for being blind to things that can happen down the road. People change.

Sorry, but I don't buy the pre-nup argument either. I'm sure for certain people (who are already very well off), a pre-nup is necessary to keep the gold-diggers away, but I don't think a pre-nup is necessary for EVERYONE who gets married.

You're trying to argue that 100% of divorces are messy ordeals, which is simply untrue. If you marry a reasonable person, chances are they won't strip you to the bone if things fall apart. My GF and I have already talked extensively about marraige, and divorce is the farthest thing from our mind. But we both know that we are reasonable people and we purposefully wouldn't hurt each other if anything went wrong.

I also agree with the OP. If a pre-nup is the first thing on your mind when getting married, you are instilling very little faith in your future marraige.

I dont even want to keep this going this is his thread. I put in my 2 cents already. Some marriages last a lifetime(fact) and alot more don't(fact). So it was merely a suggestion to think about it.

 

[claydawg]

Originally posted by: Lonyo

Originally posted by: Medicine Bear

Originally posted by: gigapet
Prenup

Sorry, don't believe in that. To me that says you think there is a chance the marriage will not work out. If that is the way someone feels then they shouldn't be getting married in the first place.

Besides, neither of us have that much. What is she going to take, my Adidas?

Prenup isn't for now, it's for then.
What happens when you buy a house together, she leaves you, and takes the kids AND the house AND your car, and leaves you with nothing?
I assume that you do want to have a house/car/kids in the future?

In the wonderful words of Prodigy, "Smack my bitch up"
But seriously...good luck and have a great life and a better honeymoon

 

[hypn0tik]

Originally posted by: Scouzer

Originally posted by: hypn0tik

Originally posted by: gigapet

Originally posted by: SouthPaW1227

You say for better or worse, 'til death do us part FOR A REASON.

People say alot of things and don't mean it.

Then such people shouldn't get married in the first place.

You are incredibly naive.

50% of marriages end in failure, 50% of people aren't idiots.

you cant see the future

If both parties aren't willing to do whatever it takes to keep the marriage successful, they shouldn't be getting married in the first place. I see divorce as a means of giving up, and people that give up when something doesn't work out lose respect in my books.

 

[BigJ]

Originally posted by: jpeyton

Sorry, but I don't buy the pre-nup argument either. I'm sure for certain people (who are already very well off), a pre-nup is necessary to keep the gold-diggers away, but I don't think a pre-nup is necessary for EVERYONE who gets married.

You're trying to argue that 100% of divorces are messy ordeals, which is simply untrue. If you marry a reasonable person, chances are they won't strip you to the bone if things fall apart. My GF and I have already talked extensively about marraige, and divorce is the farthest thing from our mind. But we both know that we are reasonable people and we purposefully wouldn't hurt each other if anything went wrong.

I also agree with the OP. If a pre-nup is the first thing on your mind when getting married, you are instilling very little faith in your future marraige.

It's kinda like a condom:

Better to have one and not need it, then to need one and not have it.

 

[Scouzer]

Originally posted by: hypn0tik

Originally posted by: Scouzer

Originally posted by: hypn0tik

Originally posted by: gigapet

Originally posted by: SouthPaW1227

You say for better or worse, 'til death do us part FOR A REASON.

People say alot of things and don't mean it.

Then such people shouldn't get married in the first place.

You are incredibly naive.

50% of marriages end in failure, 50% of people aren't idiots.

you cant see the future

If both parties aren't willing to do whatever it takes to keep the marriage successful, they shouldn't be getting married in the first place. I see divorce as a means of giving up, and people that give up when something doesn't work out lose respect in my books.

so people should stay in a relationship that no longer has any passion or desire, just to have a 'successful marriage'?



just like the old days when no one was divorced and lead unhappy lives just to have a 'sucessful marriage'

 

[CVSiN]

Originally posted by: Medicine Bear

Originally posted by: Lonyo

Originally posted by: Medicine Bear

Originally posted by: gigapet
Prenup

Sorry, don't believe in that. To me that says you think there is a chance the marriage will not work out. If that is the way someone feels then they shouldn't be getting married in the first place.

Besides, neither of us have that much. What is she going to take, my Adidas?

Prenup isn't for now, it's for then.
What happens when you buy a house together, she leaves you, and takes the kids AND the house AND your car, and leaves you with nothing?
I assume that you do want to have a house/car/kids in the future?

I refuse to go into this with thoughts that it could fail. In my mind if you have those kind of questions in your head then you aren't ready to get married.

Already own a house, already have cars, no kids yet though. If something were to happen and we split up then so be it

man your gonna get so owned.. you do know that the divorce statistic dominate all other couple statistics...
marriage in this country seems to have become the equivilent of asking a girl to go steady in high school it seems..

protect YOURSELF always..
all it says is that if you guys split up BOTH of you leave with what you started with and nothing more..
it protects both parties.

 

[Medicine Bear]

Originally posted by: jalaram

Originally posted by: chuckywang
You have my blessing. I hope you g/f doesn't read Anandtech!

I should've read this before I forwarded this thread to her. Doh!!

j/k

Good luck. Follow SouthPaw's advice and ignore all the prenup trolls.

BTW, are you going to tell your g/f about your obsession for your hefty co-workers?

She knows of and shares my hatred of fatties.

 

[mugs]

Telling her father was worst part about getting engaged for me... so I let her do it.

Is there a point to getting a prenup if neither party goes into the marriage with any significant assets? Would you make her agree to divide assets proportionately to the income you brought in, even though she may have to give up her career in order to have children? Or what?

 

[Medicine Bear]

Man, there are some sad motherfvckers in this thread.

 

[Scouzer]

Originally posted by: Medicine Bear
Man, there are some sad motherfvckers in this thread.

while your at it, dont buy car insurance because your a good driver

those who arent good drivers need car insurance & shouldnt be on the road right?

 

[jpeyton]

Originally posted by: Medicine Bear
Man, there are some sad motherfvckers in this thread.

Agreed. We got a few people in this thread who have divorce lawyers on retainers with the paperwork signed an ready-to-go.

 

[hypn0tik]

Originally posted by: Scouzer

Originally posted by: hypn0tik

Originally posted by: Scouzer

Originally posted by: hypn0tik

Originally posted by: gigapet

Originally posted by: SouthPaW1227

You say for better or worse, 'til death do us part FOR A REASON.

People say alot of things and don't mean it.

Then such people shouldn't get married in the first place.

You are incredibly naive.

50% of marriages end in failure, 50% of people aren't idiots.

you cant see the future

If both parties aren't willing to do whatever it takes to keep the marriage successful, they shouldn't be getting married in the first place. I see divorce as a means of giving up, and people that give up when something doesn't work out lose respect in my books.

so people should stay in a relationship that no longer has any passion or desire, just to have a 'successful marriage'?



just like the old days when no one was divorced and lead unhappy lives just to have a 'sucessful marriage'

No passion or desire = you aren't trying hard enough or you aren't trying new things. I'd guess it is a result of monotonous environment.