- May 15, 2015
- 10,654
- 3,610
- 136
Show us on this doll how the bad storm butt-f***ed you.
I happened to look up at my surveillance monitor and I have to do a double take. There appears to be a strange vehicle in my driveway. It's got about an inch of snow on it so it's been there for a little while at least. I go to the front door to confirm and indeed, there is some feral SUV sitting in MY driveway. I look in the snow for the drag marks that surely must have been left by cojones that big being hauled around. As I turn my head and look toward the road,, I see the problem. A 25ft pine tree has split in half and is completely blocking the road. It was like a scene from TWD. Laying right across the road, almost perpendicular.
I realize immediately that I'm going to have to get out there with a chain saw and try to at least clear enough of it so cars can pass. I live near the beginning of a very long dead end street. So this essentially traps everyone on my street at home. That's not good. But I have a small spark of optimism that maybe the township can help me out here. I call the police. No answer. I let ring for over a minute and nothing. OK, so things are probably a lot worse than I anticipated. Called 911 and they were able to put me through to a dispatcher. Yup, there's all sorts of emergencies they're dealing with so I'm on my own.
Of course the battery on my electric chainsaw is dead. I can't wait for it to charge. So I get out the pole saw which turns out to be just long enough to almost get all the way through the trunk. Of course the saw keeps getting trapped in the cut so I'm not making a lot of progress.I do manage to make two complete cuts but nothing is budging.
About then two neighbors come strolling up the street. One has a headlamp and a real chain saw. Stihl. Great saws. He makes very short work of the trunk while I whittle down the branches. The other guy helps me clear them away. I'm not sure how long we were at it but it didn't seem very long. Less than an hour. We managed to get the road completely cleared.
I now have a front yard full of debris, but I'll deal with that once the snow melts.
I happened to look up at my surveillance monitor and I have to do a double take. There appears to be a strange vehicle in my driveway. It's got about an inch of snow on it so it's been there for a little while at least. I go to the front door to confirm and indeed, there is some feral SUV sitting in MY driveway. I look in the snow for the drag marks that surely must have been left by cojones that big being hauled around. As I turn my head and look toward the road,, I see the problem. A 25ft pine tree has split in half and is completely blocking the road. It was like a scene from TWD. Laying right across the road, almost perpendicular.
I realize immediately that I'm going to have to get out there with a chain saw and try to at least clear enough of it so cars can pass. I live near the beginning of a very long dead end street. So this essentially traps everyone on my street at home. That's not good. But I have a small spark of optimism that maybe the township can help me out here. I call the police. No answer. I let ring for over a minute and nothing. OK, so things are probably a lot worse than I anticipated. Called 911 and they were able to put me through to a dispatcher. Yup, there's all sorts of emergencies they're dealing with so I'm on my own.
Of course the battery on my electric chainsaw is dead. I can't wait for it to charge. So I get out the pole saw which turns out to be just long enough to almost get all the way through the trunk. Of course the saw keeps getting trapped in the cut so I'm not making a lot of progress.I do manage to make two complete cuts but nothing is budging.
About then two neighbors come strolling up the street. One has a headlamp and a real chain saw. Stihl. Great saws. He makes very short work of the trunk while I whittle down the branches. The other guy helps me clear them away. I'm not sure how long we were at it but it didn't seem very long. Less than an hour. We managed to get the road completely cleared.
I now have a front yard full of debris, but I'll deal with that once the snow melts.
