Wedding Dilema

[MrChad]

Originally posted by: Bigsm00th
100 is way too many IMO. im limiting mine to immediate family and only very close friends. ive already told her she can suck it if she doesnt like it.

Even immediate family and close friends can get up to the 100 person mark pretty quickly.

Parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins on my side: 25
Parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins on her side: 25
Friends and guests on my side: 10-15
Friends and guests on her side: 10-15

That's 80 people right there.

 

[tami]

don't invite coworkers and people you rarely see. it's not worth it.

however, do invite the important people in your life.

 

[chimmytime]

Originally posted by: tami
don't invite coworkers and people you rarely see. it's not worth it.

however, do invite the important people in your life.

Ok, all important people are invited.

How about so-so friends, that are also business contacts, i.e. they refer clients to you?

 

[rh71]

Originally posted by: chimmytime
How about so-so friends, that are also business contacts, i.e. they refer clients to you?

NO.

You can use this as a rule... would you mind missing their wedding ? If you wouldn't mind not being invited, you don't have to invite them to yours.

 

[MrDudeMan]

Originally posted by: MrChad

Originally posted by: Bigsm00th
100 is way too many IMO. im limiting mine to immediate family and only very close friends. ive already told her she can suck it if she doesnt like it.

Even immediate family and close friends can get up to the 100 person mark pretty quickly.

Parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins on my side: 25
Parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins on her side: 25
Friends and guests on my side: 10-15
Friends and guests on her side: 10-15

That's 80 people right there.

i said immediate. all of that crap you just listed is extended. if you care about them seeing it but cant afford it, send them a video and a picture. its a stupid wedding. 1 day of your life is not worth thousands of dollars, and any woman that thinks it is needs to be slapped in the face with a reality check. it is the most selfish day in a womans life as far as i am concerned. if she needs a day to feel special about herself so everyone can oooohh and ahhhh then it wouldnt be a girl id marry anyway.

i have a normal relationship with my parents, sisters, extended family, girlfriend, her parents, her family, and plenty of friends. im a normal person, im not a tight ass, but im not into wasting money and giving attention whores what they want...attention. if you have to spend tons of money to make yourself feel good, go jump off a cliff. there is more to life than money.

/rant

 

[Tifababy]

I'm getting married in about 3 weeks and we had the problem of a quickly growing guest list too. Between her aunts, uncles and cousins and mine, we were already over 130 people. We invited 315 and we already have over 240 responding. We expecting around 260 which is well over the 80% turnout that most wedding books/magazines that my fiance read said to expect. No way it's going to be cheap, but it's also a great excuse for a family reunion and I can't wait to see everyone. Besides, it works out well for us, we get the gifts and fiance's dad gets the bill!

 

[iamwiz82]

Originally posted by: Bigsm00th

Originally posted by: MrChad

Originally posted by: Bigsm00th
100 is way too many IMO. im limiting mine to immediate family and only very close friends. ive already told her she can suck it if she doesnt like it.

Even immediate family and close friends can get up to the 100 person mark pretty quickly.

Parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins on my side: 25
Parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins on her side: 25
Friends and guests on my side: 10-15
Friends and guests on her side: 10-15

That's 80 people right there.

i said immediate. all of that crap you just listed is extended. if you care about them seeing it but cant afford it, send them a video and a picture. its a stupid wedding. 1 day of your life is not worth thousands of dollars, and any woman that thinks it is needs to be slapped in the face with a reality check. it is the most selfish day in a womans life as far as i am concerned. if she needs a day to feel special about herself so everyone can oooohh and ahhhh then it wouldnt be a girl id marry anyway.

i have a normal relationship with my parents, sisters, extended family, girlfriend, her parents, her family, and plenty of friends. im a normal person, im not a tight ass, but im not into wasting money and giving attention whores what they want...attention. if you have to spend tons of money to make yourself feel good, go jump off a cliff. there is more to life than money.

/rant

You sound like a tight ass who is trying to rationalize his attitude.

 

[CondorHero]

Originally posted by: rh71

Originally posted by: Ktulu
Invite the people that actually give a sh!t about you, or else they're just mooching off a free dinner

They come with checks in hand upwards of $75 to $100 per person. You think it's just a free dinner to them ?

this is the best response so far...

 

[CondorHero]

just wondering, why are you in charge of the guest list? They don't have any friends or family?

 

[blackdogdeek]

Originally posted by: Bigsm00th
i said immediate. all of that crap you just listed is extended. if you care about them seeing it but cant afford it, send them a video and a picture. its a stupid wedding. 1 day of your life is not worth thousands of dollars, and any woman that thinks it is needs to be slapped in the face with a reality check. it is the most selfish day in a womans life as far as i am concerned. if she needs a day to feel special about herself so everyone can oooohh and ahhhh then it wouldnt be a girl id marry anyway.

i have a normal relationship with my parents, sisters, extended family, girlfriend, her parents, her family, and plenty of friends. im a normal person, im not a tight ass, but im not into wasting money and giving attention whores what they want...attention. if you have to spend tons of money to make yourself feel good, go jump off a cliff. there is more to life than money.

/rant

we spent around $20k on our wedding and it was worth every penny.

and you're right, there is more to life than money, which is why we didn't mind spending that much of it to make it such a wonderful day.

 

[rh71]

Originally posted by: blackdogdeek

Originally posted by: Bigsm00th
i said immediate. all of that crap you just listed is extended. if you care about them seeing it but cant afford it, send them a video and a picture. its a stupid wedding. 1 day of your life is not worth thousands of dollars, and any woman that thinks it is needs to be slapped in the face with a reality check. it is the most selfish day in a womans life as far as i am concerned. if she needs a day to feel special about herself so everyone can oooohh and ahhhh then it wouldnt be a girl id marry anyway.

i have a normal relationship with my parents, sisters, extended family, girlfriend, her parents, her family, and plenty of friends. im a normal person, im not a tight ass, but im not into wasting money and giving attention whores what they want...attention. if you have to spend tons of money to make yourself feel good, go jump off a cliff. there is more to life than money.

/rant

we spent around $20k on our wedding and it was worth every penny.

and you're right, there is more to life than money, which is why we didn't mind spending that much of it to make it such a wonderful day.

same thought here. I spent $27k, got back $20k of it in gifts (cash), it turns out... but wouldn't have minded if it were half that. No big deal. It was a ton of fun and seeing everyone together again... it was a great time. .. which will never be repeated.

 

[chimmytime]

Originally posted by: CondorHero
just wondering, why are you in charge of the guest list? They don't have any friends or family?

Im not in charge of the list, but just trying to help them out. They're not getting married till next August so there's still much to do.

 

[PingSpike]

Originally posted by: LolaWiz

Originally posted by: PingSpike
Talk her into eloping. This wedding sh|t is a fvcking nightmare. Its a fvcking money pit hassle that sucks up all your time and drives you insane. Take it from me, I haven't even gotten to the worst of it yet. God its such a load of crap.

riiight... eloping is no different. we "eloped" to Hawaii and it cost us over 20k... but even ask my husband and he will tell you it was worth every penny.

anyways, it doesnt have to be stressful. Take it from me who IS married, the process is what you make of it.

e·lope
intr.v. e·loped, e·lop·ing, e·lopes

1. To run away with a lover, especially with the intention of getting married.
2. To run away; abscond.

Now, admittedly I only checked one dictionary source...but I'm pretty confident none of them is going to have "Blowing 20k on a vacation to Hawaii" in their definitions of the word "elope".

And as far as the process being what I make of it...as near as I can tell the process involves these things:
1) Picking out and purchasing ill fitting clothing that cannot be ever worn again, while paying extremely outrageous prices for it.
2) Introducing a financial hardship into your lives that benefits you for one day (argueably zero days)
3) Juggling seatings arrangements and antagonizing over trivial things like plate and flower color.
4) Giving feuding family segments something new to fight over.
5) Having invited guests resent you, uninited relatives and friends also resent you.
6) Drinking excessively in response to 1-5.

😛

 

[chimmytime]

Haha, i always told my ex-gf, smaller wedding ... bigger ring? At least that'll retain value.

 

[mercanucaribe]

Originally posted by: blackdogdeek

Originally posted by: Bigsm00th
i said immediate. all of that crap you just listed is extended. if you care about them seeing it but cant afford it, send them a video and a picture. its a stupid wedding. 1 day of your life is not worth thousands of dollars, and any woman that thinks it is needs to be slapped in the face with a reality check. it is the most selfish day in a womans life as far as i am concerned. if she needs a day to feel special about herself so everyone can oooohh and ahhhh then it wouldnt be a girl id marry anyway.

i have a normal relationship with my parents, sisters, extended family, girlfriend, her parents, her family, and plenty of friends. im a normal person, im not a tight ass, but im not into wasting money and giving attention whores what they want...attention. if you have to spend tons of money to make yourself feel good, go jump off a cliff. there is more to life than money.

/rant

we spent around $20k on our wedding and it was worth every penny.

and you're right, there is more to life than money, which is why we didn't mind spending that much of it to make it such a wonderful day.

On the other hand, if you and your fiancee are ugly, 20k in plastic surgery is enough to make you both hot.

 

[Lola]

Originally posted by: PingSpike

Originally posted by: LolaWiz

Originally posted by: PingSpike
Talk her into eloping. This wedding sh|t is a fvcking nightmare. Its a fvcking money pit hassle that sucks up all your time and drives you insane. Take it from me, I haven't even gotten to the worst of it yet. God its such a load of crap.

riiight... eloping is no different. we "eloped" to Hawaii and it cost us over 20k... but even ask my husband and he will tell you it was worth every penny.

anyways, it doesnt have to be stressful. Take it from me who IS married, the process is what you make of it.

e·lope
intr.v. e·loped, e·lop·ing, e·lopes

1. To run away with a lover, especially with the intention of getting married.
2. To run away; abscond.

Now, admittedly I only checked one dictionary source...but I'm pretty confident none of them is going to have "Blowing 20k on a vacation to Hawaii" in their definitions of the word "elope".

And as far as the process being what I make of it...as near as I can tell the process involves these things:
1) Picking out and purchasing ill fitting clothing that cannot be ever worn again, while paying extremely outrageous prices for it.
2) Introducing a financial hardship into your lives that benefits you for one day (argueably zero days)
3) Juggling seatings arrangements and antagonizing over trivial things like plate and flower color.
4) Giving feuding family segments something new to fight over.
5) Having invited guests resent you, uninited relatives and friends also resent you.
6) Drinking excessively in response to 1-5.

😛

we ran (flew) away to hawaii, to get hitched... it still cost us. We splurged... first class tix, all five star hotels, suites, ocean front rooms, photog, ceremony, wedding dinner.... in that definition, we did elope.
Eloping is and can be different to different people, especially in the 20th centry.
nevertheless, no matter what you do, destionation wedding, elope, big wedding where you live, its all gonna cost money.

Now, if you really want to save money, tell her to meet you at the court house at lunch.