Unbore me

[Syringer]

/

 

[SoylentGreen]

Want to get me banned?

 

[yllus]

IRC Topic URLs

The purpose of this service is to find 'funny' links at the different IRC networks around the world and have been around since late September 2001. It searches through 26 different IRC networks in the topics to find those URLs. There is a lot of strange people on the net, sharing their strange habbits. This service does pick up such activites too, and since it's not filtered in almost any way, strange things might come up. Who categorizes the URLs? Well, it's based strictly on MIME-types, and that is done automatically too.

Visitors beware, though most of the content the site links to is harmless, there is no filtering going on.

 

[NutBucket]

Entertain us and update your fvckin' thread:|

 

[rayray2]

Originally posted by: NutBucket
Entertain us and update your fvckin' thread:|

 

[NutBucket]

And now he's gonna leave this thread to......

 

[sash1]

"When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 Billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300C. The Russians used a pencil."

`K

 

[Schadenfroh]

~2002 DARWIN AWARDS ~



DARWIN AWARD CANDIDATES:

1. In September in Detroit, a 41-year-old man got stuck and
drowned in two feet of water after squeezing head first through an
18-inch-wide sewer grate to retrieve his car keys.


2. In October, a 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker, who
"totally zoned when he ran," accidentally jogged off a 100-foot-high
cliff on his daily run.


3. Buxton, NC: A man died on a beach when an 8-foot-deep hole he
had dug into the sand caved in as he sat inside it. Beachgoers said
Daniel Jones, 21, dug the hole for fun, or protection from the wind,
and had been sitting in a beach chair at the bottom Thursday afternoon
when it collapsed, burying him beneath 5 feet of sand. People on the
beach, on the outer banks, used their hands and shovels, trying to
claw their way to Jones, a resident of Woodbridge, VA, but could not
reach him. It took rescue workers using heavy equipment almost an
hour to free him while about 200 people looked on. Jones was
pronounced dead at a hospital.


4. In February, Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed in Lompoc, CA,
as he fell face-first through the ceiling of bicycle shop he was
burglarizing. Death was caused when the long flashlight he had placed
in his mouth (to keep his hands free) rammed into the base of his
skull as he hit the floor. [Ah, the diversity]


5. According to police in Dahlonega, GA, ROTC Cadet Nick Berrena,
20, was stabbed to death in January by fellow cadet Jeffrey Hoffman,
23, who was trying to prove that a knife could not penetrate the flak
vest Berrena was wearing.


6. Sylvester Briddell, Jr., 26, was killed in February in
Selbyville, Del, as he won a bet with friends who said he would not
put a revolver loaded with four bullets into his mouth and pull
the trigger.


7. In February, according to police in Windsor, Ontario, Daniel
Kolta, 27, and Randy Taylor, 33, died in a head-on collision, thus
earning a tie in the game of chicken they were playing with their
snowmobiles. (Go Canada!)



~DARWIN AWARD HONORABLE MENTIONS~

1. In Guthrie, Okla., in October, Jason Heck tried to kill a
millipede with a shot from his 22 caliber rifle, but the bullet
ricocheted off a rock and hit pal Antonio Martinez in
the head, fracturing his skull.


2. In Elyria, Ohio, in October, Martyn Eskins,attempting to clean
out cobwebs in his basement, declined to use a broom in favor of a
propane torch and caused a fire that burned the first and second
floors of his house.


3. Paul Stiller, 47, was hospitalized in Andover Township, NJ,
and his wife Bonnie was also injured, when a quarter-stick of dynamite
blew up in their car. While driving around at 2 AM, the bored couple
lit the dynamite and tried to toss it out the window to see what would
happen, but apparently failed to notice the window was closed.



~RUNNER UP~
(Drunken Stupor Award)

TACOMA, WA - Kerry Bingham, had been drinking with several friends
when one of them said they knew a person who had bungee-jumped from
the Tacoma Narrows Bridge in the middle of traffic. The conversation
grew more heated and at least 10 men trooped along the walkway of the
bridge at 4:30 am. Upon arrival at the midpoint of the bridge they
discovered that no one had brought a bungee rope. Bingham, who had
continued drinking, volunteered and pointed out that a coil of
lineman's cable lay nearby. One end of the cable was secured around
Bingham's leg and the other end was tied to the bridge. His fall
lasted 40 feet before the cable tightened and tore his foot off at the
ankle. He miraculously survived his fall into the icy river water and
was rescued by two nearby fishermen. "All I can say," said
Bingham, "is that God was watching out for me on that night. There's
just no other explanation for it." Bingham's foot was never located.




~AND THE WINNER! ~

PADERBORN, GERMANY -
Overzealous zookeeper Friedrich Riesfeldt fed
his constipated elephant Stefan 22 doses of animal laxative and more
than a bushel of berries, figs and prunes before the plugged-up
pachyderm finally let it fly, and suffocated the keeper under 200
pounds of prime elephant dung! Investigators say ill-fated Friedrich, 46, was
attempting to give the ailing elephant an olive oil enema when the
relieved beast unloaded on him. "The sheer force of the elephant's
unexpected defecation knocked Mr. Riesfeldt to the ground, where he
struck his head on a rock and lay unconscious as the elephant
continued to evacuate his bowels on top of him," said flabbergasted
Paderborn police detective Erik Dern. "With no one there to help him,
he lay under all that poop for at least an hour before a watchman came
along, and during that time he suffocated. It seems to be just one of
those freak accidents that happen."



another set

9. A young Canadian man, searching for a way of getting drunk cheap, mixed gasoline with milk. Not surprisingly, this concoction
made him ill, and he vomited into the fireplace in his house. The resulting explosion and fire burned his house down, killing both him
and his sister.



8. A 34-year-old white male found dead in the basement of his home died of suffocation, according to police. He was approximately
6'2" tall and weighed 225 pounds. He was wearing a pleated skirt, white bra, black and white saddle shoes, and a woman's wig. It
appeared that he was trying to create a schoolgirl's uniform look. However, he was also wearing a military gas mask that had the filter
canister removed and a rubber hose attached in its place. The other end of the hose was connected to one end of a hollow wooden
tube approx. 12" long and 3" in diameter. The tube's other end was inserted into his rectum for reasons unknown, and was the cause
of his suffocation.

7. Three Brazilian men were flying in a light aircraft at low altitude when another plane approached. It appears that they
decided to moon the occupants of the other plane, but lost control of their own aircraft and crashed. They were all found dead in the
wreckage with their pants around their ankles.



6. A police officer in Ohio responded to a 911 call. She had no details before arriving, except that someone had reported that his
father was not breathing. Upon arrival, the officer found the man face down on the couch naked. When she rolled him over to check
for a pulse and to start CPR, she noticed burn marks around his genitals. After the ambulance arrived and removed the man - who
was declared dead on arrival at the hospital - the police made a closer inspection of the couch, and noticed that the man had made a
hole between the cushions. Upon flipping the couch over, they discovered what had caused his death. Apparently, the man had
inserted his penis between the cushions, down into the hole and between two electrical sanders (with the sandpaper removed, for
obvious reasons). Evidently, his ejaculation shorted out one of the sanders, electrocuting him.

5. A 27-year-old French woman lost control of her car on a highway near Marseilles and crashed into a tree, seriously injuring her
passenger and killing herself. As a commonplace road accident, this would not have qualified for a Darwin nomination, were it not for
the fact that the driver's attention had been distracted by her Tamagotchi key ring, which had started urgently beeping for food as she
drove along. In an attempt to press the correct buttons to save the Tamagotchi's life, the woman lost her own.



4. A 22-year-old Reston, VA, man was found dead after he tried to use octopus straps to bungee jump off a 70-foot railroad trestle.
Fairfax County police said Eric Barcia, a fast-food worker, taped a bunch of these straps together, wrapped one end around one
foot, anchored the other end to the trestle at Lake Accotink Park, jumped and hit the pavement. Warren Carmichael, a police
spokesman, said investigators think Barcia was alone because his car was found nearby. "The length of the cord that he had
assembled was greater than the distance between the trestle and the ground," Carmichael said. Police say the apparent cause of
death was "Major trauma". NOTE: What are 'octopus straps'???

3. A man in Alabama died from rattlesnake bites. It seems that he and a friend were playing a game of catch, using the rattlesnake as
a ball. The friend - no doubt a future Darwin Awards candidate - was hospitalized.



2. Employees in a medium-sized warehouse in west Texas noticed the smell of a gas leak. Sensibly, management evacuated the
building extinguishing all potential sources of ignition; lights, power, etc. After the building had been evacuated, two technicians from
the gas company were dispatched. Upon entering the building, they found they had difficulty navigating in the dark. To their
frustration, none of the lights worked. Witnesses later described the sight of one of the technicians reaching into his pocket and
retrieving an object that resembled a cigarette lighter. Upon operation of the lighter like object, the gas in the warehouse exploded,
sending pieces of it up to three miles away. Nothing was found of the technicians, but the lighter was virtually untouched by the
explosion. The technician suspected of causing the blast had never been thought of as 'bright' by his peers.

And the number one nominee for this year's Darwin Award did not die, but probably wishes he had....

1. Spurred on by a bet from the other members of his threesome, Everett Sanchez tried to wash his own "balls" in a ball washer at the
local golf course. Proving once again that beer and testosterone are a bad mix, Sanchez managed to straddle the ball washer and
dangle his scrotum in the machine. Much to his dismay, one of his buddies upped the ante by spinning the crank on the machine with
Sanchez's scrotum in place, thus wedging the solidly in the mechanism. Sanchez, who immediately passed his threshold of pain,
collapsed and tumbled from his perch. Unfortunately for Sanchez, the height of the ball washer was more than a foot higher off the
ground than his testicles are in a normal stance, and the scrotum was the weakest link. Sanchez's scrotum was ripped open during the
fall, and one testicle was plucked from him forever and remained in the ball washer, while the other testicle was compressed and
flattened as it was pulled between the housing of the washer, and the rotat....