Two nuns (A repeat stolen Brutuskend JOKE)

Brutuskend

Lifer
Apr 2, 2001
26,558
4
0
Two nuns, Sister Catherine and Sister Helen, are traveling through Europe in their car. They get to Transylvania and are stopped at a traffic light.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, a tiny little Dracula jumps onto the hood of the car and hisses through the windshield.

"Quick, quick!" shouts Sister Catherine. "What shall we do?"

"Turn the windshield wipers on. That will get rid of the abomination," says Sister Helen.

Sister Catherine switches them on, knocking Dracula about, but he clings on and continues hissing at the nuns. "What shall I do now?" she shouts.

"Switch on the windshield washer. I filled it up with Holy Water at the Vatican," says Sister Helen.

Sister Catherine turns on the windshield washer. Dracula screams as the water burns his skin, but he clings on and continues hissing at the nuns.
"Now what?" shouts Sister Catherine?

"Show him your cross," says Sister Helen.

"Now you're talking," says Sister Catherine.

She opens the window and shouts, "Get the fvck off the car!"

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Maybe THIS time people will get it.... ;)
 

ajpa123

Platinum Member
Apr 19, 2003
2,401
1
0
I would have liked it better if she leaned out the window and punched him with her right hand. (a right cross).

EDIT: Crappy grammar, etc.
 

Brutuskend

Lifer
Apr 2, 2001
26,558
4
0
Main Entry: 1cross
Pronunciation: 'kros
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English, from Old Norse or Old Irish; Old Norse kross, from Old Irish cros, from Latin cruc-, crux
1 a : a structure consisting of an upright with a transverse beam used especially by the ancient Romans for execution b often capitalized : the cross on which Jesus was crucified
2 a : CRUCIFIXION b : an affliction that tries one's virtue, steadfastness, or patience
3 : a cruciform sign made to invoke the blessing of Christ especially by touching the forehead, breast, and shoulders
4 a : a device composed of an upright bar traversed by a horizontal one; specifically : one used as a Christian symbol b capitalized : the Christian religion
5 : a structure (as a monument) shaped like or surmounted by a cross
6 : a figure or mark formed by two intersecting lines crossing at their midpoints; specifically : such a mark used as a signature
7 : a cruciform badge, emblem, or decoration
8 : the intersection of two ways or lines : CROSSING
9 : ANNOYANCE, THWARTING <a cross in love>
10 a : an act of crossing dissimilar individuals b : a crossbred individual or kind c : one that combines characteristics of two different types or individuals
11 a : a fraudulent or dishonest contest b : dishonest or illegal practices -- used especially in the phrase on the cross
12 : a movement from one part of a theater stage to another
13 : a hook thrown over the opponent's lead in boxing
14 : a security transaction in which a broker acts for both buyer and seller (as in the placing of a large lot of common stock) -- called also cross-trade
[cross illustration]
 

ajpa123

Platinum Member
Apr 19, 2003
2,401
1
0
Reminds me of this crappy joke. Here goes...

Q---> What do you call an angry writing utensil?

A---> A Cross Pen
 

waggy

No Lifer
Dec 14, 2000
68,145
10
81
Originally posted by: ajpa123
Reminds me of this crappy joke. Here goes...

Q---> What do you call an angry writing utensil?

A---> A Cross Pen

NOW thats funny! heh