Originally posted by: PrinceofWands
I always deemed myself as 'questing'. Not atheist, or agnostic, or undecided. For 22+ years I've quested for what I can believe in, deeply studying most religions and philosophies along the way. Until last year I hadn't decided if there was any divinity whatsoever, be it monotheistic, eastern, collective-uncounscious, etc. Last year some things happened that clinched it for me...and now I know that there is a divinity, there is a responsive consciousness. I don't know enough yet to claim a particular religion as accurate, but I know that there is a God (or something equivalent) and it does want me to learn more about it and believe in it. That's good enough for me to focus my energies towards those pursuits.
What I'm saying is, no one could convince me...not with all the writings in the world. Watching my daughter be born didn't convince me, watching my mother die didn't make me need to fake a belief...it happened when it happened, and it had nothing to do with me trying to figure it out. It took more than two decades. I think that's ok. I think belief comes to each person in the way it has to for them to truly believe it, and understand it. And nothing we can do or say changes that. It's not between you and your parents, or your spouse, or your pastor (or rabbi)...it's between you and God, and he'll decide when and how you come to know him.
And I think, though others may disagree, that that's only the beginning. I have known very few people who's faiths didn't change somewhat over the years. I think that's the way it's supposed to be, constantly growing and evolving and looking for better understanding...just like a spouse struggles a lifetime for a better relationship with their significant other.
Just my feelings on it. Good luck to you.