To quit my job or not...

[ch33zw1z]

Yea, it's totally shitty. I'm lucky whereas my team lead and manager are very supportive of living a life outside of work. The give and take goes both ways. The business as a whole could care less, inlcuding execs, but if you manager is a solid buffer then it helps.

 

[Stopsignhank]

First of all and I know others will disagree, but never burn a bridge. I was laid off from a job. Was a stay at home dad for a number of years. When I decided to go back to work I could not get an interview to save my life. Probably because of the gap. The company that laid me off rehired me.

Second, as the father of an autistic kid, tell your wife thanks!

 

[Carson Dyle]

First of all and I know others will disagree, but never burn a bridge.

Good advice. But that doesn't mean you should completely rule out punching your boss in the face and telling him to go to Hell. It just means don't do anything to harm the company or its interests. If the guy is a douchebag, it will eventually become apparent. They may one day fire him and call you with an apology and a plea to come back.

 

[slackerinabox]

First of all and I know others will disagree, but never burn a bridge. I was laid off from a job. Was a stay at home dad for a number of years. When I decided to go back to work I could not get an interview to save my life. Probably because of the gap. The company that laid me off rehired me.

Well, the company's financial picture's awful and they've separated from (either fired or they quit) 8 employees this fiscal year (out of 30something), I don't really need their good will but I understand what you're saying.

Second, as the father of an autistic kid, tell your wife thanks!

Ha, no thanks necessary - her work (unlike mine) is incredibly rewarding and she actually has a reason to wake up in the morning, I'm jealous actually! And she loves her kids, even the ones who occasionally make her want to rip out her hair 🙂

 

[DaTT]

I'm not asian. Very caucasian. It's just who we are 🙂

That being said, I work my ass off 40-60 hours/week(like you, sounds like you more though!), and expect the company to appreciate what I do...not turn around and demand more.

At the end of the day, when the times are tough, etc...who's really there for you. That's what matters. It's very obvious that your boss lacks comprehension of other's situations.

This is why I like my company. When needed I put in the extra time and effort. In return, last winter was severely cold and snowy so lots of my work could not be done. I basically sat in the office being overhead for three months....boring as hell but I wasn't laid off for those three months.....most of the time I just made an appearance and went home....left my phone on so that's how I justified a full days pay. lol

 

[Ns1]

Assuming you're not fired, I hope you're looking for an exit strategy.

 

[DaTT]

Ha, no thanks necessary - her work (unlike mine) is incredibly rewarding and she actually has a reason to wake up in the morning, I'm jealous actually! And she loves her kids, even the ones who occasionally make her want to rip out her hair 🙂

I have 2 people within my family that work with autistic children. I couldn't even imagine how difficult it would be raising an autistic child, the level of patience required.

ps from what I have been told, sometimes the children rip your hair out for you.

 

[ch33zw1z]

I have 2 people within my family that work with autistic children. I couldn't even imagine how difficult it would be raising an autistic child, the level of patience required.

ps from what I have been told, sometimes the children rip your hair out for you.

My brother worked at a school for autistic kids for 7 years. It's a very demanding job that requires way more patience than I could muster. It also requires very caring people.

 

[maxi007]

you have the experience dude , why you still with that company , better search new gud luck

 

[slackerinabox]

I have 2 people within my family that work with autistic children. I couldn't even imagine how difficult it would be raising an autistic child, the level of patience required.

ps from what I have been told, sometimes the children rip your hair out for you.

Yes, her first year was brutal (this is her 3rd year) but she's a pro now. She works with the kids who are the lowest functioning in her school so, yes, there's some hair ripping/biting/etc. She's learned to be quicker 🙂 Her new move this year is doing fitness videos with her class for the first hour - tires them out and helps them really work out there negative energy. My nephew's autistic as well and, yes, it's not just a job for her...

I can't say I'm not envious of her having purpose and actually making a difference, I'm frankly inspired to find a lesser paying and more rewarding job outside of IT, because it's just become such awful drudgery. It just seems like we're not respected for the brains that we have, know what I mean?

 

[Stopsignhank]

I don't know why people work with autistic kids either, but I sure am glad there are special people like that on the earth. Just like the angels that work in the PICU, but that is my daughter's story.

I will tell you this though, my son is completely awesome! At his middle school graduation they had to stop the ceremonies because the other kids were cheering for him.

OP, sorry for the threadjack. Update your resume this weekend and start sending it out.

 

[slackerinabox]

I don't know why people work with autistic kids either, but I sure am glad there are special people like that on the earth. Just like the angels that work in the PICU, but that is my daughter's story.

I will tell you this though, my son is completely awesome! At his middle school graduation they had to stop the ceremonies because the other kids were cheering for him.

OP, sorry for the threadjack. Update your resume this weekend and start sending it out.

No worries, I think people who care for special needs children (as teachers or especially parents) are really under appreciated, threadjack away. I really am no fan of my sister but she does an incredible job with her autistic son, early intervention was key to him being as healthy and happy as he is. It's heartbreaking whenever my wife tells me about her lowest functioning kids, parental neglect is a big reason they're not where they could be as (now) teenagers.

Yes, resume updated and already sending them out as we speak 🙂

 

[IndyColtsFan]

Well, the company's financial picture's awful and they've separated from (either fired or they quit) 8 employees this fiscal year (out of 30something), I don't really need their good will but I understand what you're saying.

Remember, it isn't about not burning bridges with your old company, it is more about not burning bridges with former colleagues. Even if that company goes under, you could work with some of these guys in the future or some of them may be in charge of hiring at a place where you apply.

A couple of jobs ago, we had a really bad employee who REALLY burned bridges with all of us (I won't tell the entire story, too long). Anyway, at my last job, I was looking to hire someone to replace me as I was moving to another position. Guess whose resume landed on my desk? Want to take a wild guess what I did with it?

 

[Puppies04]

OP start looking for another job now.

As for the meeting, go to it and lay out how long the work he wants done is realistically going to take. When he tells you that he wants it done faster tell him what you need to make it quicker and how much you can reduce the timescale by. Just play it by the book.

If he is being openly hostile to you put in a formal complaint (put in several), this guy sounds like a coward and it might get him to back off, even if it doesn't I fail to see what you will lose by being a douchbag to him.

 

[slackerinabox]

If he is being openly hostile to you put in a formal complaint (put in several), this guy sounds like a coward and it might get him to back off, even if it doesn't I fail to see what you will lose by being a douchbag to him.

That's what's hilarious, the COO also does HR. I'd be complaining to him. The only possible person I can reach out to is the CEO, but they're buddies - could mean immediate termination or an even more hostile work environment. I literally have the email written already, I just don't have the guts to send it because I just know it'll bring more pain if they keep me around.

 

[Greenman]

Sometime you just have to unload on the boss. I did it many years back, and never regretted it. The guy was an asshole that needed to be put in his place. We got along quite well after that.

 

[slackerinabox]

Remember, it isn't about not burning bridges with your old company, it is more about not burning bridges with former colleagues. Even if that company goes under, you could work with some of these guys in the future or some of them may be in charge of hiring at a place where you apply.

A couple of jobs ago, we had a really bad employee who REALLY burned bridges with all of us (I won't tell the entire story, too long). Anyway, at my last job, I was looking to hire someone to replace me as I was moving to another position. Guess whose resume landed on my desk? Want to take a wild guess what I did with it?

I get you, but this is NYC - a huge city and I don't plan on working in that industry (non-profit with a very niche mission)... Though, yes. I'm just arguing because I really do want to tell him off, not my coworkers though obviously.

 

[TXHokie]

What a horrible working environment. How hard is it to find a similar job in that area? I've had two bosses in my career that gave me that "job first, family second" attitude and I was out of there going to a new job within two months. Took a 15% paycut that second time and it was worth every penny. Life's to short to put up with that crap.

 

[alkemyst]

OP start looking for another job now.

As for the meeting, go to it and lay out how long the work he wants done is realistically going to take. When he tells you that he wants it done faster tell him what you need to make it quicker and how much you can reduce the timescale by. Just play it by the book.

If he is being openly hostile to you put in a formal complaint (put in several), this guy sounds like a coward and it might get him to back off, even if it doesn't I fail to see what you will lose by being a douchbag to him.

career suicide.

 

[Stopsignhank]

threadjack away.

So this morning I was reminded of when my son was in high school the teacher who taught the low functioning autistic kids actually had a talent show with the kids. We had no idea what to expect. It turns out my son was the MC (He is high functioning) and he ended up doing the who is on first routine with anther kid. Each kid had their own act. For the kids who were non-verbal they danced, or lip synced to their favorite songs. One kid held up signs that had knock knock jokes. It was absolutely fantastic. What was fun was to watch the teacher and see the look of joy on her face as she watched the show.

The show was in the class room and on the same night as the high school kids for the regular kids. I guarantee that there was more joy in that little room than there was in the auditorium with the rest of the school. It was truly a life changing night for all of us parents in that room. For the kids also.

The next year the show was held in the regular auditorium and my son again was the MC and sang a song from Monsters Inc. One of the highlights of this show was the kids that would just randomly walk across the stage.

Just thought I would add a bright spot into this thread.

 

[Rover321]

career suicide.

Rubbish. Bullies should never be tolerated. If his complaint is genuine he should complain to the governing body of the organization.

 

[slackerinabox]

So I've made the decision to just change careers - nursing (have 3 in the family) seems like a secure future and a challenge that's exciting, a much needed change from being the guy who clears paper jams. Schooling's not too bad ($5,000 for 2 years) and we're confident that the 2 years will be tough on our budget but doable.

Now the question is if I slowly exit or just quit. I applied to school last night but know it's a process - do I stick around until the Spring semester starts, our cut the cord / and take care of my kids (and save some cash) until the semester starts, because once schooling and my hopeful career starts the hours will be wacky and I may regret not spending more time with the baby.

 

[Muse]

Nursing. Well, an upside for sure is the security. If you are certified and good you won't find it difficult to find work. Do your homework and find out what to expect. Good luck!

 

[Muse]

So this morning I was reminded of when my son was in high school the teacher who taught the low functioning autistic kids actually had a talent show with the kids. We had no idea what to expect. It turns out my son was the MC (He is high functioning) and he ended up doing the who is on first routine with anther kid. Each kid had their own act. For the kids who were non-verbal they danced, or lip synced to their favorite songs. One kid held up signs that had knock knock jokes. It was absolutely fantastic. What was fun was to watch the teacher and see the look of joy on her face as she watched the show.

The show was in the class room and on the same night as the high school kids for the regular kids. I guarantee that there was more joy in that little room than there was in the auditorium with the rest of the school. It was truly a life changing night for all of us parents in that room. For the kids also.

The next year the show was held in the regular auditorium and my son again was the MC and sang a song from Monsters Inc. One of the highlights of this show was the kids that would just randomly walk across the stage.

Just thought I would add a bright spot into this thread.

Great story. There's a lot of different kinds of autism. Some autistics are very functional on their own level and can have fantastic lives. Like the song says, "wouldn't it be a real drag if we were all the same?"

 

[Imp]

So I've made the decision to just change careers - nursing (have 3 in the family) seems like a secure future and a challenge that's exciting, a much needed change from being the guy who clears paper jams. Schooling's not too bad ($5,000 for 2 years) and we're confident that the 2 years will be tough on our budget but doable.

Now the question is if I slowly exit or just quit. I applied to school last night but know it's a process - do I stick around until the Spring semester starts, our cut the cord / and take care of my kids (and save some cash) until the semester starts, because once schooling and my hopeful career starts the hours will be wacky and I may regret not spending more time with the baby.

If you could use the money, working until school starts isn't a bad idea.

On the other hand, if you do quit, you could spend more time with kids AND do some prep work for school. Volunteer at a hospital, research more schools, study some of the basics on your own, etc.