Tips on how to fire someone...

[SacrosanctFiend]

Do NOT fire her without another witness present. That could present legal trouble if she decided to file discrimination. Other than that, just be genuine, but kind.

 

[Xavier434]

When people get fired, they should already know why but they will want to hear it from you anyways. Be direct, honest, and to the point. Don't butter it up with the whole, "It's not personal, just business crap". While she may have sucked as your employee, she very well may want to improve herself for her next job. So, be the good guy and let her know why she messed up so that she knows what to improve for her next job. There is nothing unprofessional about that. It's the right thing to do.

The only thing you should be concerned with talking about is the stuff that could get you in trouble legally. There is nothing that cannot be talked about with someone. It's all a matter of word choice. Be honest, but be politically correct enough to cover your ass.

 

[needalife]

First, run around your parking lot until you have plenty of sweat on your face.
Have her come into your office and lock the door behind her.
Put the gun to her head and say, "I'm gonna have to either fire you or this gun! You make the call..."
Make sure to shake your hands when you say it..

 

[HammerCurl]

Originally posted by: tfinch2
<Trump>YOU'RE FIRED!</Trump>

Make sure you do it like the Conan impression.

 

[NikolaeVarius]

Arrange a bunch of post its on her deks to spell out "YOU'RE FIRED"

 

[JeffreyLebowski]

Well at least be a man and give her a pearl necklace before she leaves.

 

[jandrews]

25 here, started in management a few years ago. The best things are to just stick to the facts. Also, you NEVER fire someone one on one, you need another manager in the room with you who can back up what you said in case she files a lawsuit or lies to unemployment about what was said during termination. Also, we immediately document the gist of the conversation after it happens and send it to our company lawyer to ensure proper documentation.

 

[Gooberlx2]

you - "All those with a job raise their hand."

*secretary starts to raise her hand*

you - "Not so fast."

 

[Xavier434]

Originally posted by: jandrews
25 here, started in management a few years ago. The best things are to just stick to the facts. Also, you NEVER fire someone one on one, you need another manager in the room with you who can back up what you said in case she files a lawsuit or lies to unemployment about what was said during termination. Also, we immediately document the gist of the conversation after it happens and send it to our company lawyer to ensure proper documentation.

One on one plus some signed paperwork protecting yourself from such things is more professional and less stressful on the person being fired in my opinion. Just make sure that the paperwork the person is signing has been covered by a good lawyer.

 

[ahurtt]

Originally posted by: bctbct
I have found what works for me is to keep what you say to the point, without deatils and avoid any statements that may seem like a question to her or that you are inviting a debate.

I have never fired a girl so you are pretty much fucked because she is going to cry.

Sounds like a great opportunity for some pitty/comfort sex to me!

 

[jandrews]

Originally posted by: Xavier434

Originally posted by: jandrews
25 here, started in management a few years ago. The best things are to just stick to the facts. Also, you NEVER fire someone one on one, you need another manager in the room with you who can back up what you said in case she files a lawsuit or lies to unemployment about what was said during termination. Also, we immediately document the gist of the conversation after it happens and send it to our company lawyer to ensure proper documentation.

One on one plus some signed paperwork protecting yourself from such things is more professional and less stressful on the person being fired in my opinion. Just make sure that the paperwork the person is signing has been covered by a good lawyer.

Doesnt matter really, someone who signs paperwork when they are being fired are in absolutely no condition to really undestand the paperwork and could easily argue that the other person was yelling at them and they were emotionally strained to sign the paper. Either you+hr person or you and your boss seems to be a good team for these type of things.

 

[SacrosanctFiend]

Originally posted by: Xavier434

Originally posted by: jandrews
25 here, started in management a few years ago. The best things are to just stick to the facts. Also, you NEVER fire someone one on one, you need another manager in the room with you who can back up what you said in case she files a lawsuit or lies to unemployment about what was said during termination. Also, we immediately document the gist of the conversation after it happens and send it to our company lawyer to ensure proper documentation.

One on one plus some signed paperwork protecting yourself from such things is more professional and less stressful on the person being fired in my opinion. Just make sure that the paperwork the person is signing has been covered by a good lawyer.

I don't see how one on one is any more professional. Not to mention, paperwork isn't always ironclad, and it's always nice to have a second person telling the same story as you.

 

[Born2bwire]

Call everybody into the same room. Ask everyone who is employed by the company to raise their hand. When she starts to do so, stop her and say, "No not you."

EDIT: Damn you nkgreen!!!

 

[gnumantsc]

Man the Drew Carey show had great examples of how Mr.Wick fired people. How about create a card saying Have a good day and on the inside YOU'RE FIRED! and attach a pink slip?

 

[Savarak]

give her a huge stack of papers that require her signature without having to read through it all... stick "her" resignation letter in the stack. video tape it under the guise of doing an "day in the life in the office" video. have a forensic handwriting analyzer sign an affidavit that the signature is authentic. then you do this:

Originally posted by: Jhill
Just say how long have you worked here next September. When she says it will be 1 year. Smoke a cigarette and say no it won't.

 

[Xavier434]

Originally posted by: jandrews
Doesnt matter really, someone who signs paperwork when they are being fired are in absolutely no condition to really undestand the paperwork and could easily argue that the other person was yelling at them and they were emotionally strained to sign the paper. Either you+hr person or you and your boss seems to be a good team for these type of things.

Meh, I didn't consider the whole "I was too emotionally retarded at the time" thing. It's such a lame excuse to make. You're right. Bring a witness OP.

 

[CloudMog]

You could always make it sporting. Ask if she can tell you why you shouldn't fire her without using the letter "E", she can keep her job.

 

[ISAslot]

Office linebackers make these kinds of tasks a lot easier.

 

[piasabird]

Just tell her that her job performance is not working out for her current position and so you must let her go. You could tell her before lunch time and tell her she has the rest of the day off to clear out her things and leave. She probably already know she is not doing that well. People have a sense of these things.

 

[Chrono]

Originally posted by: nick1985
Scream in her face "YOU'RE FIRED". Then laugh in her face Nelson style...then proceed to powerbomb her through her desk. Once the powerbomb is complete tell her to GTFO and make sure the door doesnt hit her ass on the way out. This method is statistically proven to reduce 'postal' incidents.

:thumbsup:

HAHA much props for this one. I like it!