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Time for an anal probe!

JulesMaximus

JulesMaximus

No Lifer
No, it’s not aliens. I’m having a colonoscopy tomorrow.

I can’t eat anything for the next 24 hours. My last meal was dinner last night, I had an In-N-Out double double. This should be an interesting experience...
 
JulesMaximus said:
No, it’s not aliens. I’m having a colonoscopy tomorrow.

I can’t eat anything for the next 24 hours. My last meal was dinner last night, I had an In-N-Out double double. This should be an interesting experience...
Click to expand...

I'm seeing the consultant for a routine check-in in a couple of weeks and I have the feeling the consultant is going to tell me it's time for them to ride the colonic rollercoaster again. My sympathies, this will be my third. I just wish they'd put me out for the count rather than sedated and aware.

On the plus side, it's preferable to find out if something nasty like bowel cancer is in its infancy I suppose, rather than waiting for it to progress far enough for (noticeable by me) symptoms to start.

Good luck. I assume by the fact that you're hitting the fast food (I assume that's fast food anyway) means it's a routine check for you as well, in which case I hope they don't find anything!
 
Braznor said:
I hope the doctor who does it for you has small hands.
Click to expand...

They use a camera of some sort. I’ve already had my doctor’s finger up there... and I’d rather not talk about it.

This is just a routine screening. I turned 50 last year so it is time.
 
I think I've had 3 now? (At 31....crohn's disease FTL). Anyway, it's not that bad. The worst part is the preparation - drinking only clear liquids for 1.5 days miserable. The first thing I want when I finish is a burger amd a shake, hah.

Also since this is your first go round, have something to keep you entertained on the toilet for a while (possibly hours). You'll be on your porcelain throne for a good while
 
Does your insurance cover for the whole thing?

I'm about due for mine and I'm on one of those high deductible plan which will require a chunk of change. I'm told I should shop around since I'm about to get it stuck in my a** both physically and financially.
 
I just had one last Thursday. The worst part is the flush, damn that shit is nasty tasting. Then of course the inevitable after effects. 😱

Also, be aware you will be farting all day tomorrow after the procedure. I had never had a 30 second long fart before. 😵
 
TXHokie said:
Does your insurance cover for the whole thing?

I'm about due for mine and I'm on one of those high deductible plan which will require a chunk of change. I'm told I should shop around since I'm about to get it stuck in my a** both physically and financially.
Click to expand...
Isn't it considered preventative care under the ACA?
 
JulesMaximus said:
No, it’s not aliens. I’m having a colonoscopy tomorrow.

I can’t eat anything for the next 24 hours. My last meal was dinner last night, I had an In-N-Out double double. This should be an interesting experience...
Click to expand...

When you wake up and find that you are leaking white stuff from your rear that is just the fluid they use during the procedure, honest.
 
JulesMaximus said:
They use a camera of some sort. I’ve already had my doctor’s finger up there... and I’d rather not talk about it.

This is just a routine screening. I turned 50 last year so it is time.
Click to expand...

Did you find it rather odd that he had a hand on each of your shoulders while he had his "finger" up there?
 
mikeymikec said:
I'm seeing the consultant for a routine check-in in a couple of weeks and I have the feeling the consultant is going to tell me it's time for them to ride the colonic rollercoaster again. My sympathies, this will be my third. I just wish they'd put me out for the count rather than sedated and aware.

On the plus side, it's preferable to find out if something nasty like bowel cancer is in its infancy I suppose, rather than waiting for it to progress far enough for (noticeable by me) symptoms to start.

Good luck. I assume by the fact that you're hitting the fast food (I assume that's fast food anyway) means it's a routine check for you as well, in which case I hope they don't find anything!
Click to expand...

When I had mine they did put me completely out. I woke up and didn't even realize they were done.
 
Protip, find a flavor of Gatorade that you absolutely hate already to drink along with that liquid medicine they give you to force all your shit out. You will absolutely hate the flavor after that experience, so you might as well pick one you already hate.

Also, get some wet wipes, after the purge, your ass will be super raw and wiping will be a painful experience.
 
Platypus said:
Protip, find a flavor of Gatorade that you absolutely hate already to drink along with that liquid medicine they give you to force all your shit out. You will absolutely hate the flavor after that experience, so you might as well pick one you already hate.

Also, get some wet wipes, after the purge, your ass will be super raw and wiping will be a painful experience.
Click to expand...

It would be better to use wet wipes during the purge as well to reduce or eliminate the rawness.
 
Darwin333 said:
When I had mine they did put me completely out. I woke up and didn't even realize they were done.
Click to expand...

Ditto for my first one, but I was in a bad way then and I think they probably thought it was wiser on that occasion.


---

Another tip: Last time I had the op, I didn't drink as much as I should (in general I consider myself to be a person that drinks plenty so I thought it would be enough), and the laxatives didn't have half the effect they should (but were still damn uncomfortable). Drink loads.
 
JulesMaximus said:
No, it’s not aliens. I’m having a colonoscopy tomorrow.

I can’t eat anything for the next 24 hours. My last meal was dinner last night, I had an In-N-Out double double. This should be an interesting experience...
Click to expand...

You should swallow donuts whole. Then you can have a laugh tomorrow when they pull the camera out.
 
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