- Oct 9, 1999
- 21,019
- 156
- 106
Computerworld magazine has stories every week from IT people and things that happened in the workplace. Always good for a chuckle.
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User stops support person in the hall and says, "My laptop won't connect to the Internet at home anymore."
Support Person: Did we configure the laptop for wireless?
User: I don't know.
SP: Who is your ISP?
User: I don't know.
SP: Did you set up your own wireless system at home?
User: I don't know.
SP: (Hmmm....) Did someone close by move recently?
User: Yes, my upstairs neighbor.
SP: I think it's time for you to move.
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This company is changing to using email addresses for login IDs. The new format is firstname.lastname@companyname.com. They send a memo about the change that includes an example: jill.employee@companyname.com. Support person gets an email from a user asking "Hi, if my email is rita.employee@companyname.com, what about those of us who share a first name with several people (Jennifer, Steve, Kim, etc.)?"
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Frantic new sales guy grabs support person as he walks by and asks why the printers don't work. "He showed me the problem printout, which had been unceremoniously discarded in the trash," support person says. "I asked which pages were missing. 'All the even pages,' he said. I took the pages out of the salesman's hands, flipped them over, handed them back - and asked, 'Now what pages are missing?'"
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User: "My keyboard isn't working anymore."
Support person: "Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?"
User: "No, I can't get behind the computer."
SP: "Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back. "
User: "OK."
(Pause.)
Fish: Did the keyboard come with you?
User: "Yes."
Fish: That means the keyboard isn't plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
User: "Yes, there's another one here. Ah, that one does work."
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Database admin support person is showing the new-hire help desk guy the server room. See this red button under the plastic flip cover? SP says. Do not press it. Which new hire proceeds to do - and down goes a custom financial app. Why did you do that? sputters SP. "Oh, just turn the power back on," new guy says, "nothing important is running." Sighs SP, "After a few more incidents, he was gone -- as he told everyone - to pursue his dream job as a mainframe guru."
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User: 5 have a *r6b3e0 - gfs f5xed 0y c60*4ter b4t n6w 0y ca*s 36c2 see0s t6 be *er0anent3y 36c2ed - any s4gget56ns+
Support person: Wanna try that one again in non-l33tspeak?
User: can't
User: st4c2 that way
User: gfs d5d 5t
SP: Um, you have your num lock on?
User: n6
User: c64rse n6t
Support person: Shift ScrLk
(A pause.)
User: you are just so awesome
User: thanks!!!!!
------------
User stops support person in the hall and says, "My laptop won't connect to the Internet at home anymore."
Support Person: Did we configure the laptop for wireless?
User: I don't know.
SP: Who is your ISP?
User: I don't know.
SP: Did you set up your own wireless system at home?
User: I don't know.
SP: (Hmmm....) Did someone close by move recently?
User: Yes, my upstairs neighbor.
SP: I think it's time for you to move.
------------
This company is changing to using email addresses for login IDs. The new format is firstname.lastname@companyname.com. They send a memo about the change that includes an example: jill.employee@companyname.com. Support person gets an email from a user asking "Hi, if my email is rita.employee@companyname.com, what about those of us who share a first name with several people (Jennifer, Steve, Kim, etc.)?"
------------
Frantic new sales guy grabs support person as he walks by and asks why the printers don't work. "He showed me the problem printout, which had been unceremoniously discarded in the trash," support person says. "I asked which pages were missing. 'All the even pages,' he said. I took the pages out of the salesman's hands, flipped them over, handed them back - and asked, 'Now what pages are missing?'"
------------
User: "My keyboard isn't working anymore."
Support person: "Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?"
User: "No, I can't get behind the computer."
SP: "Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back. "
User: "OK."
(Pause.)
Fish: Did the keyboard come with you?
User: "Yes."
Fish: That means the keyboard isn't plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
User: "Yes, there's another one here. Ah, that one does work."
------------
Database admin support person is showing the new-hire help desk guy the server room. See this red button under the plastic flip cover? SP says. Do not press it. Which new hire proceeds to do - and down goes a custom financial app. Why did you do that? sputters SP. "Oh, just turn the power back on," new guy says, "nothing important is running." Sighs SP, "After a few more incidents, he was gone -- as he told everyone - to pursue his dream job as a mainframe guru."
------------
User: 5 have a *r6b3e0 - gfs f5xed 0y c60*4ter b4t n6w 0y ca*s 36c2 see0s t6 be *er0anent3y 36c2ed - any s4gget56ns+
Support person: Wanna try that one again in non-l33tspeak?
User: can't
User: st4c2 that way
User: gfs d5d 5t
SP: Um, you have your num lock on?
User: n6
User: c64rse n6t
Support person: Shift ScrLk
(A pause.)
User: you are just so awesome
User: thanks!!!!!
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