This is not a callout thread, the first pages of my novel, people especially ProfJohn

[Perknose]

where have i heard that quote before? Apparently its from a book called 100 Years of Solitude, but I have not read that...

Great novel by an equally great writer. I think LoCutos (sic) used to feature it in his sig. "Love in the Time of Cholera" is his other most recognized masterwork.

OP, any money you spend in publishing and promoting what you have written will be wasted.

ProJo gave you a surprisingly good initial revision, though.

OP, you have much to learn and absorb before any success will come your way. For instance, English . . .

 

[ProfJohn]

ProJo gave you a surprisingly good initial revision, though.

Thanks dude.

If I spent as much time writing as I do trolling P&N I'd be Steven King by now

 

[ProfJohn]

where have i heard that quote before? Apparently its from a book called 100 Years of Solitude, but I have not read that...

Magical realism. Insanely awesome idea.

A Very Old Man With Enormous Wings
http://salvoblue.homestead.com/wings.html

It is a story about a guy with giant wings and how people react to him.

His stories are full of things like that and every one just sort of accepts them like there is no big deal.

Reminds me of the Harry Potter stories where there are witches, wizards, dragons etc etc and she never stops to explain them they just exist. "There is a troll in the dungeon!" Oh, okay...

 

[Braznor]

Hmm, it seems that I would have to spend around 10,000 USD on a professional editor.

The problem with my English skills is that I learnt English instinctively as a second language.

I have absolutely no idea or clue about grammar. I don't even know what verbs or pronouns are.

Can anyone help me locate a good professional editor?

 

[nick1985]

Has anyone told you your story kinda sucks?

 

[Braznor]

Has anyone told you your story kinda sucks?

Everyday!

But I can iron out the quirks.

 

[Braznor]

The story is not what it initially seems. The novel is not about rebels vs the soviets. The story is about a war which happens after a man called Sildron Heydrich, the Architect of the Solar State plots an intra universal war by invoking something called a Psycloson. This Psycloson in the form of Sildron's ancestor Reinhard Heydrich tries to destroy the universe itself in hopes of remaking this universe in its own image.

The soviet state is just a backdrop to the events,.

 

[ProfJohn]

I don't think an editor is going to do you any good at this point.

You need to work on a good story first. Otherwise you are wasting time.

Write out an outline for the story first and then build from there. When the outline is good enough that people want to read more then work on the story aspect.

But right now there is nothing about the story that interests me.

BTW perhaps you should start with the Psycloson thing. Make it a prologue so people get a sense of what is coming and then go back to the doctor and the soviet thing.