This is a(nother) question for guys (ladies can answer, too)...

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Isla

Elite member
Sep 12, 2000
7,749
2
0
Who has time for friends?

Heck, after a long day for both of us, we are lucky to have time for each other...

Anyway, as far as being possessive/controlling... I'm not, no point in it. The Mister can be controlling (and boy does he regret it when he is! :p ) but he isn't really possessive. We both have friends of the opposite sex, no big deal.
 

Looney

Lifer
Jun 13, 2000
21,938
5
0
It depends if i'm friends with the males she hangs out with... if they're a close friend of mine as well, then i don't have a problem. If they're not, and i barely know them, then definitely jealousy. Also depends on the male, if he's known to be flirty or has the hots for her, then definitely a no-no.

 

lyric

Senior member
May 6, 2001
302
0
0
I'm perfectly fine with having my boyfriend persue friends of the opposite sex and he's perfectly fine with me doing the same. I actually don't mind either if he ends up flirting with them and such. He can do whatever he wants. It's all about the trust issue. We both really trust each other and know that cheating will never be a factor in the relationship. We both actually allow each other to go on dates with other people if we ever met someone else that we liked, as long as we both know about it and as long as we let each other know what happened during the date. We're both pretty much free to do anything, as long as our feelings for each other doesn't decrease and the feelings for the third person increase. We both feel that we shouldn't be shakled to each other at such a young age. Actually, no one should be shakled to each other. We all should be able to meet other people, explore (not sex wise) and see what else is out there. Don't get me wrong.. This issue doesn't show how much we care for each other and how devoted we are to each other. We both love each other deeply. Like the saying goes... "Relationships are like sand.. Grip on too tightly, and the sand will slip through the cracks of your fingers."
 

AUMM

Diamond Member
Mar 13, 2001
3,029
0
0
mt gf is very possessive, she gets mad even if i talk to friends who are girls on the phone or online or nething
 

yakko

Lifer
Apr 18, 2000
25,455
2
0
I have no problem with my chick having other friends who are guys as long as I trust the guy.
 

nomahe

Banned
May 21, 2001
344
0
0
If it was a guy she was friends with before we got together,fine. Also depends on where they went out and how often. Not if it was a guy she met afterwards. I know I'll get flamed for this,but, VERY few guys can be friends with girls w/o wanting something more.
 

tennesota

Lifer
Aug 9, 2000
11,911
0
76
It all comes back to...how secure are you with yourself?
Typically, jealously is born out of insecurity and a lack of trust.
 

amnesiac

Lifer
Oct 13, 1999
15,781
1
71
tennesota hit the nail on the head..

When I was dating my first g/f, I always got SO jealous if she even talked about a guy in her class. It drove me nuts when she became good friends with this guy at her work as well (I was justified though, he turned out to be the biggest a$$ on the planet). Then again, I was about 18-19 and still not super secure with myself.

Now, I have more self-confidence than I know what to do with, and things like that couldn't bother me less. It also depends on how much you trust the person you're with. I love and trust my current g/f completely, so if she had a really good guy friend and hung out with him all the time, it wouldn't bother me at all, since I know she wouldn't cheat on me. I expect the same level of respect and trust in return, as I have many close girl friends from work and school who I hang out with as well, but I would NEVER cheat regardless of the circumstances.

 

DPOverLord

Golden Member
Dec 20, 1999
1,980
1
86
Hmmm....
Well I think I would be able to trust her. I am pretty open, and sociable. I could never see someone doign that to me. So why should it be the same for her? I talk with everyone.... I mean EVERYONE . I doubt anyone has seen someone who loves to talk and mingle, and such than me. SO if my girl friend were to get jealous as to me having many girls who are friends ( I would hope guyz would not matter lol). So I would never worry about her being with another guy. However I do have to admit as in the movie HE says she says (I believe) Most guyz are there for not just friends, but for more. Since thats in their nature... Not all guyz but I would have to say 90% are like that.
However, if you are dating someone its a subject of trust. AS robert deniro in "meet the parents" would say

<< You are now in the circle of trust. once you break that trust its very hard to get back into it >>

, Could not be said better.
I am pretty easy going though. However, I dont like being cheated on. Nor do I cheaton my girl friend. Since why would I need anyone else? LoL I am getting carried away... so to answer the question simply since I almost forgot :D ;). Of course you might be like hmmm.. spend more time with me. But everyone neesd to have more of a social life than your partner. Since you need to expand your realms. However, I dont like it when they get intimate I mean not like a kisson the cheek. Since thats what I do when I say good bye( it must be that middle eastern blood ;) ). Just as long its not like frenching and stuff. I am easy going, and no one cheats on me since I guess I am just pretty good like that.
That help kitty?
Jon
 

shiner

Lifer
Jul 18, 2000
17,112
1
0
Girls have guy friends, guys have girl friends. No big deal...why get all bent out of shape if they are coming home to you at night? If you can't trust someone enough to let them hang with other friends then you probably need to reevaluate your relationship.
 

DaLeroy

Golden Member
Dec 4, 2000
1,406
0
0
If I know the guys, not a problem, but if I don't I tend to get a 'bit' suspicious, not because of my GF because I know she wouldn't cheat, but because of the tendencies of the male race to bonk everything in sight. Then again, I hang with chicks she doesn't really know, and get the usual goodbye hugs and kisses on the cheek, so why should I tell her not too. As long as you trust eachother, fine...just don't try to touch my chick and you'll be ok :)
 

Noriaki

Lifer
Jun 3, 2000
13,640
1
71
I don't have a GF, but if I did, I'd let her be friends with whoever she wants. It's not my place to tell her she can't have male friends.

I'd trust her completely...and in the end I'd get backstabbed, and get a whole lot of pain in repayment for my trust...but I'll continue to trust. A relationship isn't worth having if you can't trust the other person.
 
Feb 7, 2000
1,004
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Guys, how do you feel about your girlfriend being close friends with other guys, going out with her guy friends (without you), and/or getting to know and befriend other males? Are you cool with that, or would you prefer it if you were the only male in her life?

unacceptable
 

Scrapster

Diamond Member
Nov 27, 2000
3,746
0
0
Unacceptable!!! I like to keep my woman (slave) chained up in the basement. Sometimes I let her out for some daylight just to keep her lightly tanned. For christmas I even bought her a TV to keep down there. Cable? Hell no, not with all those hollywood big shots (brad pitt, ben affleck, ....). I keep it on C-SPAN with all those old political analysts with their big face moles and bad toupays. With this arrangement I trust her 110 percent!