Thinking about doing an office sting.

torpid

Lifer
Sep 14, 2003
11,631
11
76
In my office, there are a lot of absurd things that happen. The most absurd is that there are signs posted everywhere that "scented perfumes, colognes, lotions, and deodorants" are not allowed. I have tried civil disobedience on that one, but my manager was complained to about it when I used some fragrant hand lotion.

However, I might be able to do something about the second-most ridiculous thing. Once in a while, I put a drink in the fridge with my name in permanent marker in at least 2 highly visible locations. Once in a while I go to retrieve it, and it is totally gone.

I'm thinking of planning a sting to catch the culprit. The sting would involve putting some sort of dye in the drink that would turn their lips / mouth an obvious color. Of course, I have no idea if such a thing exists. Anyone know?

Or if you can come up with another way to catch someone in the act that does not involve expensive camera equipment, I'm all ears, or eyes I guess.
 

K1052

Elite Member
Aug 21, 2003
51,977
44,865
136
Just start dosing it with the strongest fast acting laxitive you can find.

 

Heisenberg

Lifer
Dec 21, 2001
10,621
1
0
I think you should rig some sort of string and pulley system attached to the drink that would drop a cinder block on the person in front of the fridge.
 

torpid

Lifer
Sep 14, 2003
11,631
11
76
Originally posted by: K1052
Just start dosing it with the strongest fast acting laxitive you can find.

I thought about that, but I can't keep track of hundreds of people's bowel movements to know who the culprit is. Or is the thought that they would know it came from the drink and thus wouldn't steal it again?
 

ahurtt

Diamond Member
Feb 1, 2001
4,283
0
0
Food coloring would do it. But how are you gonna get it in a sealed can / bottle? Maybe you should just put some watered down piss in there clearly labeled with your name. It ain't your fault if somebody drinks it without knowing what was in it right? Would serve them right.
 

K1052

Elite Member
Aug 21, 2003
51,977
44,865
136
Originally posted by: torpid
Originally posted by: K1052
Just start dosing it with the strongest fast acting laxitive you can find.

I thought about that, but I can't keep track of hundreds of people's bowel movements to know who the culprit is. Or is the thought that they would know it came from the drink and thus wouldn't steal it again?

A few nights of stomach cramping and an unstoppable case of the runs should dissuade most people

 

TitanDiddly

Guest
Dec 8, 2003
12,696
1
0
'Neutral Red' is sold in pet stores to give to pets, so you know where(if) they are peeing. It's supposed to be safe to ingest- but don't take my word for it. Check the bottle.

Edit: It will stain skin, and it comes out the same color- eg red pee. It'll make them think they're pissing blood.
 

neegotiator

Golden Member
Jan 19, 2006
1,117
1
0
Originally posted by: K1052
Originally posted by: torpid
Originally posted by: K1052
Just start dosing it with the strongest fast acting laxitive you can find.

I thought about that, but I can't keep track of hundreds of people's bowel movements to know who the culprit is. Or is the thought that they would know it came from the drink and thus wouldn't steal it again?

A few nights of stomach cramping and an unstoppable case of the runs should dissuade most people


besides it shouldn't be too hard to find the guy sweating bullets making a trip to the john every chance he gets
 

Juno

Lifer
Jul 3, 2004
12,574
0
76
Originally posted by: ahurtt
Food coloring would do it. But how are you gonna get it in a sealed can / bottle? Maybe you should just put some watered down piss in there clearly labeled with your name. It ain't your fault if somebody drinks it without knowing what was in it right? Would serve them right.

the coworkers could assume OP was inserting some flavored juice that they may be tempted to grab it. it's a sense of nature that can be distracted.

AH THAT DRINK! *grabs and drinks*
OP finds out i have green lips. :D
 

Stuxnet

Diamond Member
Jun 16, 2005
8,392
1
0
Originally posted by: torpid
In my office, there are a lot of absurd things that happen. The most absurd is that there are signs posted everywhere that "scented perfumes, colognes, lotions, and deodorants" are not allowed. I have tried civil disobedience on that one, but my manager was complained to about it when I used some fragrant hand lotion.

However, I might be able to do something about the second-most ridiculous thing. Once in a while, I put a drink in the fridge with my name in permanent marker in at least 2 highly visible locations. Once in a while I go to retrieve it, and it is totally gone.

I'm thinking of planning a sting to catch the culprit. The sting would involve putting some sort of dye in the drink that would turn their lips / mouth an obvious color. Of course, I have no idea if such a thing exists. Anyone know?

Or if you can come up with another way to catch someone in the act that does not involve expensive camera equipment, I'm all ears, or eyes I guess.

CA glue FTW?
 

torpid

Lifer
Sep 14, 2003
11,631
11
76
Originally posted by: neegotiator
Originally posted by: K1052
Originally posted by: torpid
Originally posted by: K1052
Just start dosing it with the strongest fast acting laxitive you can find.

I thought about that, but I can't keep track of hundreds of people's bowel movements to know who the culprit is. Or is the thought that they would know it came from the drink and thus wouldn't steal it again?

A few nights of stomach cramping and an unstoppable case of the runs should dissuade most people


besides it shouldn't be too hard to find the guy sweating bullets making a trip to the john every chance he gets

That would take away from my valuable ATOT posting time, though. There are multiple restrooms and in theory it could be someone from a different floor coming down to steal.
 

Juno

Lifer
Jul 3, 2004
12,574
0
76
Originally posted by: jbourne77
Originally posted by: torpid
In my office, there are a lot of absurd things that happen. The most absurd is that there are signs posted everywhere that "scented perfumes, colognes, lotions, and deodorants" are not allowed. I have tried civil disobedience on that one, but my manager was complained to about it when I used some fragrant hand lotion.

However, I might be able to do something about the second-most ridiculous thing. Once in a while, I put a drink in the fridge with my name in permanent marker in at least 2 highly visible locations. Once in a while I go to retrieve it, and it is totally gone.

I'm thinking of planning a sting to catch the culprit. The sting would involve putting some sort of dye in the drink that would turn their lips / mouth an obvious color. Of course, I have no idea if such a thing exists. Anyone know?

Or if you can come up with another way to catch someone in the act that does not involve expensive camera equipment, I'm all ears, or eyes I guess.

CA glue FTW?

poisonous?
 

K1052

Elite Member
Aug 21, 2003
51,977
44,865
136
I'd say it is more important for the thefts to stop than knowing who is doing it.

Anyway, you would be assured that they have suffered for their crimes.:evil:
 

Stuxnet

Diamond Member
Jun 16, 2005
8,392
1
0
Originally posted by: Juno
Originally posted by: jbourne77
Originally posted by: torpid
In my office, there are a lot of absurd things that happen. The most absurd is that there are signs posted everywhere that "scented perfumes, colognes, lotions, and deodorants" are not allowed. I have tried civil disobedience on that one, but my manager was complained to about it when I used some fragrant hand lotion.

However, I might be able to do something about the second-most ridiculous thing. Once in a while, I put a drink in the fridge with my name in permanent marker in at least 2 highly visible locations. Once in a while I go to retrieve it, and it is totally gone.

I'm thinking of planning a sting to catch the culprit. The sting would involve putting some sort of dye in the drink that would turn their lips / mouth an obvious color. Of course, I have no idea if such a thing exists. Anyone know?

Or if you can come up with another way to catch someone in the act that does not involve expensive camera equipment, I'm all ears, or eyes I guess.

CA glue FTW?

poisonous?

Not IN the drink... just on the can/bottle. It would make the culprit pretty damn easy to identify. They're the tard frantically trying to remove an object that's fused to their hands.
 

J Heartless Slick

Golden Member
Nov 11, 1999
1,330
0
0
Originally posted by: torpid
In my office, there are a lot of absurd things that happen. The most absurd is that there are signs posted everywhere that "scented perfumes, colognes, lotions, and deodorants" are not allowed. I have tried civil disobedience on that one, but my manager was complained to about it when I used some fragrant hand lotion.

However, I might be able to do something about the second-most ridiculous thing. Once in a while, I put a drink in the fridge with my name in permanent marker in at least 2 highly visible locations. Once in a while I go to retrieve it, and it is totally gone.

I'm thinking of planning a sting to catch the culprit. The sting would involve putting some sort of dye in the drink that would turn their lips / mouth an obvious color. Of course, I have no idea if such a thing exists. Anyone know?

Or if you can come up with another way to catch someone in the act that does not involve expensive camera equipment, I'm all ears, or eyes I guess.

It would probably be better for everyone involved if you spent more time doing your job than on this crap you are worried about.
 

torpid

Lifer
Sep 14, 2003
11,631
11
76
Originally posted by: jbourne77
Not IN the drink... just on the can/bottle. It would make the culprit pretty damn easy to identify. They're the tard frantically trying to remove an object that's fused to their hands.

But it could be an innocent just trying to move the drink out of the way to get at their food.

I'm about 75% interested in seeing who it is and 25% in getting it to stop. It only happens once in a great while. I just want to know what sort of jerk would do it.
 

Stuxnet

Diamond Member
Jun 16, 2005
8,392
1
0
FWIW, I actually vote for the laxative solution. You may not be able to figure out who it is, but you could punish them into oblivion. Don't be shy with it either. Put as much as you can in without altering the taste.

Getting an asshole to sh*t his liver FTW.
 

torpid

Lifer
Sep 14, 2003
11,631
11
76
Originally posted by: J Heartless Slick
Originally posted by: torpid
In my office, there are a lot of absurd things that happen. The most absurd is that there are signs posted everywhere that "scented perfumes, colognes, lotions, and deodorants" are not allowed. I have tried civil disobedience on that one, but my manager was complained to about it when I used some fragrant hand lotion.

However, I might be able to do something about the second-most ridiculous thing. Once in a while, I put a drink in the fridge with my name in permanent marker in at least 2 highly visible locations. Once in a while I go to retrieve it, and it is totally gone.

I'm thinking of planning a sting to catch the culprit. The sting would involve putting some sort of dye in the drink that would turn their lips / mouth an obvious color. Of course, I have no idea if such a thing exists. Anyone know?

Or if you can come up with another way to catch someone in the act that does not involve expensive camera equipment, I'm all ears, or eyes I guess.

It would probably be better for everyone involved if you spent more time doing your job than this crap you are worried about.

It's harder to do my job when I have BO due to no deodorant, dry cracked hands due to no moisturizer, and am dehydrated due to no drink.
 

Stuxnet

Diamond Member
Jun 16, 2005
8,392
1
0
Originally posted by: torpid
Originally posted by: jbourne77
Not IN the drink... just on the can/bottle. It would make the culprit pretty damn easy to identify. They're the tard frantically trying to remove an object that's fused to their hands.

But it could be an innocent just trying to move the drink out of the way to get at their food.

Collateral damage.
 

Juno

Lifer
Jul 3, 2004
12,574
0
76
Originally posted by: jbourne77
FWIW, I actually vote for the laxative solution. You may not be able to figure out who it is, but you could punish them into oblivion. Don't be shy with it either. Put as much as you can in without altering the taste.

Getting an asshole to sh*t his liver FTW.

what if that person was a hottest chick? :Q