The super annoying coworker

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James Bond

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Jan 21, 2005
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This one guy I work with is constantly annoying me. Honestly, I think that he thinks he's being funny and outgoing, but no, it's just annoying.

He got married about 2 months ago, so since then, he does nothing but rag on other peoples relationships. Any time a girl comes up in conversation he will immediately begin making sexual innuendos and tell me that I don't have a chance for <blank> reason. When he does this, he is joking, but I still want to punch his face.

He also feels the need to touch everyone else's hair. I do not understand this. I shower every morning and look damn good coming into the office. He does not. So every time he comes in my wing, he will sit next to me then either pat my head or put his hands all over my hair. I usually end up scooting away or telling him to fuck off, and he laughs and makes weird comments about my hair, trying to poke fun at me, I guess.

The weird thing is that he seems to only do this with people who actually look nice when they come to work. I've seen him act this way with several others, and it's always the guys that put effort into their appearance. I work in IT, so this is about 20% of the group.

Aside from his weirdness, he's a nice guy and tends to bring food. I don't want to be a total dick and hurt his feelings, but honestly, wtf?
 

Savij

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Nov 12, 2001
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"Dude, stop touching my hair. It's really annoying and childish. This is the last time I warn you."
 

S Freud

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Apr 25, 2005
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I knew a guy like that. I tend to be a bit of a smart ass and some people find amusement in annoying me to hear what I say. They find it funny so sometimes he would annoy me in order to get a reaction out of me.

 

James Bond

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Jan 21, 2005
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Originally posted by: S Freud
I knew a guy like that. I tend to be a bit of a smart ass and some people find amusement in annoying me to hear what I say. They find it funny so sometimes he would annoy me in order to get a reaction out of me.

Wow, never thought of it like that. I tend to be the loudest and most entertaining one in the group so that could definitely have to do with it some.
 

Savij

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Nov 12, 2001
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Originally posted by: James Bond
Originally posted by: her209
You're James Bond!!!

While shooting him with a silencer would be effective, I think it may be against company policy.

Shoot him w/o using the silencer.
 

James Bond

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Jan 21, 2005
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Originally posted by: meltdown75
you work with a douchebag

what kind of food does he bring in?

He has this awesome popcorn maker, so he makes the entire team popcorn several times throughout the day. He even has the pro seasonings and butter and shit. He also brings in big bags of granola and candy bars like once every couple weeks.
 

meltdown75

Lifer
Nov 17, 2004
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Originally posted by: James Bond
Originally posted by: meltdown75
you work with a douchebag

what kind of food does he bring in?

He has this awesome popcorn maker, so he makes the entire team popcorn several times throughout the day. He even has the pro seasonings and butter and shit. He also brings in big bags of granola and candy bars like once every couple weeks.
so he's good for something. i work with douchebags that are good for nothing.
 

shocksyde

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Jun 16, 2001
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Originally posted by: James Bond
Originally posted by: meltdown75
you work with a douchebag

what kind of food does he bring in?

He has this awesome popcorn maker, so he makes the entire team popcorn several times throughout the day. He even has the pro seasonings and butter and shit. He also brings in big bags of granola and candy bars like once every couple weeks.

Eat a pound (bulk?) of peanuts, then take a dump in his popcorn maker. Mmmm, nutty.
 

EvilYoda

Lifer
Apr 1, 2001
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Originally posted by: shocksyde
Originally posted by: James Bond
Originally posted by: meltdown75
you work with a douchebag

what kind of food does he bring in?

He has this awesome popcorn maker, so he makes the entire team popcorn several times throughout the day. He even has the pro seasonings and butter and shit. He also brings in big bags of granola and candy bars like once every couple weeks.

Eat a pound (bulk?) of peanuts, then take a dump in his popcorn maker. Mmmm, nutty.

"Huh...I don't remember eating corn..."
 
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