- May 18, 2001
- 7,882
- 380
- 126
This is a prime example of why I don't watch much TV.
It must have seemed like such a great idea during those late hour production meetings. Some junior executive suckup probably invested all his corner window office hopes on it. What we need, someone decided, is for all tv shows to have 97% more drama by drawing out a crucial moment to ridiculosity. But just like Communism, what must have seemed great on paper turns out to be the most nerve-frayingly annoying thing I think I've ever witnessed: the Pregnant Pause.
I saw it last night on the HGTV show "My House is Worth What?" The idea behind this show is that a real estate expert goes into people's houses, does a quick assessment, then at the end tells the homeowner the current estimated market value of their home. So here is how the obviously staged revelation at the end goes:
Real Estate Expert: So would you like to know the value of your home?
Owner: Yes! Yes! Please tell me, O Fount of Real Estate Knowledge!!!
Real Estate Expert: The current market value of your home is... <voice trails off>
<10 second shot of Owner looking nervous>
<10 second shot of Owner's wife looking nervous>
<10 second shot of Expert looking smug>
<10 second shot of Owner's wife looking nervously at owner>
<10 second shot of Owner looking nervously at Expert>
<10 second shot of Expert raising his eyebrows knowingly>
<10 second shot of Owner's dog nervously humping the cat>
<10 second shot of Owner's wife running to the restroom with a nervous bladder>
<10 second shot of Owner's girlfriend showing up at the wrong time>
<10 second shot of Owner praying fervently>
<10 second shot of Expert jotting down something important in his notebook>
<10 second shot of Owner's wife returning from restroom, looking nervous>
<10 second shot of Owner clutching wife's hand>
Real Estate Expert: Your house isn't worth the toilet paper that's stuck to your shoe!!! Thanks for playing, losers!!!
Stuff like this makes me think that 90% of all TV is specially designed for special-ed children.
It must have seemed like such a great idea during those late hour production meetings. Some junior executive suckup probably invested all his corner window office hopes on it. What we need, someone decided, is for all tv shows to have 97% more drama by drawing out a crucial moment to ridiculosity. But just like Communism, what must have seemed great on paper turns out to be the most nerve-frayingly annoying thing I think I've ever witnessed: the Pregnant Pause.
I saw it last night on the HGTV show "My House is Worth What?" The idea behind this show is that a real estate expert goes into people's houses, does a quick assessment, then at the end tells the homeowner the current estimated market value of their home. So here is how the obviously staged revelation at the end goes:
Real Estate Expert: So would you like to know the value of your home?
Owner: Yes! Yes! Please tell me, O Fount of Real Estate Knowledge!!!
Real Estate Expert: The current market value of your home is... <voice trails off>
<10 second shot of Owner looking nervous>
<10 second shot of Owner's wife looking nervous>
<10 second shot of Expert looking smug>
<10 second shot of Owner's wife looking nervously at owner>
<10 second shot of Owner looking nervously at Expert>
<10 second shot of Expert raising his eyebrows knowingly>
<10 second shot of Owner's dog nervously humping the cat>
<10 second shot of Owner's wife running to the restroom with a nervous bladder>
<10 second shot of Owner's girlfriend showing up at the wrong time>
<10 second shot of Owner praying fervently>
<10 second shot of Expert jotting down something important in his notebook>
<10 second shot of Owner's wife returning from restroom, looking nervous>
<10 second shot of Owner clutching wife's hand>
Real Estate Expert: Your house isn't worth the toilet paper that's stuck to your shoe!!! Thanks for playing, losers!!!
Stuff like this makes me think that 90% of all TV is specially designed for special-ed children.
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