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The new normal: A child out of wedlock

dud

dud

Diamond Member
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/46438194/ns/us_news-the_new_york_times/


Of note:

"The shift is affecting children’s lives. Researchers have consistently found that children born outside marriage face elevated risks of falling into poverty, failing in school or suffering emotional and behavioral problems."


IMHO this is not good for the kids, the "parents" and the nation. If you are concerned with your country ... start with the family. Regardless of your religious belief (if any) what's your take on this issue?
 
Yeah, woman at work is knocked up, she 's dumb as a post and fat, rude and ugly to boot, it's been so nice having her gone...
 
This isn't new - it's been going on for decades, now, despite the millions of dollars spent on "sex education".
 
sixone said:
This isn't new - it's been going on for decades, now, despite the millions of dollars spent on "sex education".
Click to expand...

the article's point isn't that it's new, it's that it's the new normal. it has been going on for decades but not at the current volume.
 
amdhunter said:
How can god allow this to happen?
Click to expand...

Religion doesn't need to enter into the discussion. No matter what you believe it's pretty obvious that a bad family environment has a negative effect on kids.

My wife works at a school where most of the kids come from very troubled families. The kids learn by example and from what they see in their own families the think its perfectly normal to have a screwed up family. Parents that just get up and leave, single parents that can barely get by, parents screaming at or hitting each other, etc. The kids will spend their whole childhood without actually seeing a healthy relationship. That will screw them up for life.
 
lol my dad's parents never married, I am a bastard grandson oh noes!

They remained together, at least until my grandfather bit the dust a couple years back.
 
Does it matter when more than half of the marriages end up in divorce? It just saves them the hassle and costs of the divorce. I know several couples living together and they've kids. One has been living together for 15 years so they outlasted most marriages.
 
Seems kinda misleading. A lot of people aren't getting married but still live together.

People always think things are going down the shitter because they have these fantasy "times" in their head when things were just oh so fucking wonderful. Its bullshit.
 
PieIsAwesome said:
lol my dad's parents never married, I am a bastard grandson oh noes!

They remained together, at least until my grandfather bit the dust a couple years back.
Click to expand...
I think they're talking about single parent families rather than a couple staying together for years raising there children.

In your grandparents case, I'm sure they saw themselves as being married. 🙂
 
Jodell88 said:
I think they're talking about single parent families rather than a couple staying together for years raising there children.

In your grandparents case, I'm sure they saw themselves as being married. 🙂
Click to expand...

Its a case that is different from the norm, but now that I think of it, I'm not sure why anyone would choose not to get married even if they are responsible parents.

I don't actually know why my grandparents did that. If you see yourselves as married, why not get married?

A couple can decide that they will be together forever, and that they do not need marriage (a contract) to guarantee this.
They then plan to and have a child, and raise the child in a stable family, etc.

If you accept that you will be together forever, might as well get married? There is no need for a wedding. Just do the paperwork, get the health insurance benefits, save yourself the social stigma, and call it a day. Not sure of the drawbacks.
 
dud said:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/46438194/ns/us_news-the_new_york_times/


Of note:

"The shift is affecting children’s lives. Researchers have consistently found that children born outside marriage face elevated risks of falling into poverty, failing in school or suffering emotional and behavioral problems."


IMHO this is not good for the kids, the "parents" and the nation. If you are concerned with your country ... start with the family. Regardless of your religious belief (if any) what's your take on this issue?
Click to expand...

My take is that it probably has nothing to do with marriage per se, as that's an arbitrary cultural invention. It's more likely that it's about children who are growing up outside of the familiarity of a stable family relationship, regardless of marital status.
 
Bignate603 said:
Religion doesn't need to enter into the discussion. No matter what you believe it's pretty obvious that a bad family environment has a negative effect on kids.

My wife works at a school where most of the kids come from very troubled families. The kids learn by example and from what they see in their own families the think its perfectly normal to have a screwed up family. Parents that just get up and leave, single parents that can barely get by, parents screaming at or hitting each other, etc. The kids will spend their whole childhood without actually seeing a healthy relationship. That will screw them up for life.
Click to expand...

This^^, kids learn so much from the interactions between their parents, although that can also happen with unmarried couples, however marriage has a bigger part to play in society than just publicly declared commitment by a couple
 
the only relevant discussion here should be how many kids are living with only 1 adult, at any time, being in charge of them. With the divorce rate what it is - having a child in or out of marriage doesn't matter, it's how many parents and/or adults are helping to raise them.
 
AFAIK, that's a pretty normal occurrence in other countries, particularly Scandinavia. And I don't think there's any connection over there between bastard children and poverty, behavioral problems or poor academics. There's something else at play in this equation, like the fact that the whole of America is getting dumber and more irresponsible anyway, and that just happens to be one of the common traits shared with those that have babies out of wedlock.

Plus, I don't think these statistics reflect a relationship where two mature people decide to have a kid without being married; this is about the subjects of I'm A Teen Mom whose kids would be f-ed up whether or not the redneck moms and dads were married.
 
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