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The best unintentional voicemail I have ever received

MotionMan

MotionMan

Lifer
I settled a case and was dealing with the final paperwork with the other attorney when I received a great unintentional voicemail from him.

He has a distinctive voice, so I know it was him. It looks like he started calling me, got a call on his cellphone/other phone and forgot he was calling me on speakerphone.

I wish I could upload the audio, because it is probably funnier that the transcription as follows:

D..d..directly.
<pause>
Yeah, well, I took it directly to the, uh, place.
<pause>
Uh, why...why don?t you check today and see.
<pause>
Oh, your mail has already come? Yeah, well no, I mailed it.
<long pause>
Uh, I, obviously I know that, but I mailed it.
<pause>
I?m telling you right now, I directly took it to the Post Office.
<short pause>
No, not on that day, no. Like last week, no last week. Because I had to get a check from my Dad.
<short pause>
We get a check.
<pause>
Thanks.
<sound of phone being hung up>
Bitch.

LOL.

MotionMan
 
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAwhat
 
Put your phone on speaker, start up recorder that's built into windows... and go? Then come back when we can hear it.
 
Originally posted by: Platypus
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAwhat
Click to expand...

 
Originally posted by: Platypus
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAwhat
Click to expand...

This made me laugh out loud for real. I imagined the image of some dude that might resemble someone that would want to be called Platypus for 7 years and thought of them laughing really really hard in a chair with a computer in front of them. That was good.
 
Originally posted by: ThePresence
I guess you had to be there.
Click to expand...

I guess.

Here is what I found funny:

Uh, why...why don?t you check today and see.
pause
Oh, your mail has already come? Yeah, well no, I mailed it.
Click to expand...

I?m telling you right now, I directly took it to the Post Office.
short pause
No, not on that day, no. Like last week, no last week.
Click to expand...

Typical "The check is in the mail" BS and she ain't buying it.

Thanks.
sound of phone being hung up
Bitch.
Click to expand...

How times have you done that, but no one hears you. Busted.


Oh, well. Not my first cruise on the failboat and it won't be my last.

MotionMan
 
This is better than the 30 minute vm of muffled voices and jangling keys I got once when my friend called me on accident when his phone was in his pocket.
 
heh i did find it kinda funny.

we think all lawyers make tons of money. so having one telling a bill collecter the check is in the mail is kinda funny.



 
Originally posted by: paulxcook
This is better than the 30 minute vm of muffled voices and jangling keys I got once when my friend called me on accident when his phone was in his pocket.
Click to expand...

I have a cousin-in-law who did that to me all the time. I finally physically removed my number from his phone autodial.

MotionMan
 
Originally posted by: paulxcook
This is better than the 30 minute vm of muffled voices and jangling keys I got once when my friend called me on accident when his phone was in his pocket.
Click to expand...

I was doing the walk and talk on the phone with my girlfriend, when, for some unknown reason, my arm decided it would be a good idea to spasm and let go of the phone. It ended up flying about 20 yards into a patch of rosebushes. So I'm trying to get it out, and I can hear yelling on the other end of the line, "What the hell is wrong with you!? HELLO??!" She didn't believe me when I said I had thrown my phone into a rosebush, either. She was pissed. And this happened the same day I got chewed out because I was mean to her in her dream. Women...

 
Originally posted by: Atomic Playboy
Originally posted by: paulxcook
This is better than the 30 minute vm of muffled voices and jangling keys I got once when my friend called me on accident when his phone was in his pocket.
Click to expand...

I was doing the walk and talk on the phone with my girlfriend, when, for some unknown reason, my arm decided it would be a good idea to spasm and let go of the phone. It ended up flying about 20 yards into a patch of rosebushes. So I'm trying to get it out, and I can hear yelling on the other end of the line, "What the hell is wrong with you!? HELLO??!" She didn't believe me when I said I had thrown my phone into a rosebush, either. She was pissed. And this happened the same day I got chewed out because I was mean to her in her dream. Women...
Click to expand...


oh my god!

my wife was mad at me for a week because she had a dream i cheated on her and left her with no money and no home.

i was like WTF id idnt do anything. she said i did! in her dream


fricken wimen
 
Originally posted by: waggy
Originally posted by: Atomic Playboy
Originally posted by: paulxcook
This is better than the 30 minute vm of muffled voices and jangling keys I got once when my friend called me on accident when his phone was in his pocket.
Click to expand...

I was doing the walk and talk on the phone with my girlfriend, when, for some unknown reason, my arm decided it would be a good idea to spasm and let go of the phone. It ended up flying about 20 yards into a patch of rosebushes. So I'm trying to get it out, and I can hear yelling on the other end of the line, "What the hell is wrong with you!? HELLO??!" She didn't believe me when I said I had thrown my phone into a rosebush, either. She was pissed. And this happened the same day I got chewed out because I was mean to her in her dream. Women...
Click to expand...


oh my god!

my wife was mad at me for a week because she had a dream i cheated on her and left her with no money and no home.

i was like WTF id idnt do anything. she said i did! in her dream


fricken wimen
Click to expand...

My best friends wife did this sort of garbage to him once. He cheated on her in her dream so she was mad despite the fact that he hadn't actually cheated on her in real life.

My wife dreamed that I was trying to kill her or something like that once, but fortunately her head is on straight most of the time so she didn't hold it against me.
 
Someone once called me by accident and I had a full minute of of a serious screaming match between a husband and wife. They would die if they knew I heard that. She was accusing him of sleeping with his secretary. 🙂
 
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