Testicle Stroking Agency: Had your balls cupped yet?

[alchemize]

Don't like radiation? Prefer not to have random government agents looking at your package? How about we play with your twig and berries instead?

I travel a lot. I'm careful to avoid the full body scanners and head for a line with metal detectors only, and will decline going through one if ever asked to. However, the first agent that cups my balls is likely to get a knee in the chin. Do it to my kid and it's going to get uglier.

New boss, same as the old boss. I hate the effing mall cops TSA...

 

[nageov3t]

and here I was planning to take a week off of sex.

 

[bamacre]

Perhaps the gov't has been buying books from Amazon.

 

[Corn]

and here I was planning to take a week off of sex.

Well, just get married and don't fly........

 

[Scotteq]

CAPTION TIME!!

TSA Agent: ..."You wouldn't be hiding a bomb, would you Sir?"


Passenger: "...Depends"


***********


"So.... Is that a colostomy bag, or are you just happy to see me??"

***********

 

[CPA]

I have already made the conscious decision not to fly if I am subjected to the full-body scanners. Not complaining, they can do what they want to do, I just won't give them my money.

 

[alchemize]

Well, just get married and don't fly........

He said a week, corn, not a lifetime

 

[Perknose]

As much as it sucks to be subjected to such a search, can you even begin to imagine being paid ~12/hr or so to DO that, day in and day out, to a representative cross-section of obese America?

 

[Scotteq]

As much as it sucks to be subjected to such a search, can you even begin to imagine being paid ~12/hr or so to DO that, day in and day out, to a representative cross-section of obese America?

Kind of like "TSA Employee Meets People Of Wal~Mart"??

 

[Jaskalas]

That this kind of crap even exists, is a testament to a bunch of cave dwelling primates half way around the world. We like to think we're superior, that we are in control and have the upper hand.

Keep saying that we're 'USA NUMBER ONE!!!!1!!!!!!11!111111!!!!11' next time you have to strip down and get a hand shoved between your legs. You think our opponent lost? You think we are winning? Go stand in line for the TSA again.

If we are defeated by third world shitbags, what does that make us? :hmm: Think about that next time you'd think something derogatory of them. Think of how we have prostrated ourselves into becoming even lesser creatures. You want something REAL derogatory? Go tell people you're an American.

 

[CycloWizard]

I have already made the conscious decision not to fly if I am subjected to the full-body scanners. Not complaining, they can do what they want to do, I just won't give them my money.

Oh, they get your money one way or the other. Even if you avoid paying the "9/11 security fee" tacked on to every plane ticket, TSA still gets a nice chunk of change from the feds to maintain their workforce of 10+ agents at the College Station, TX airport to operate the lone metal detector.

 

[CycloWizard]

That this kind of crap even exists, is a testament to a bunch of cave dwelling primates half way around the world. We like to think we're superior, that we are in control and have the upper hand.

Keep saying that we're 'USA NUMBER ONE!!!!1!!!!!!11!111111!!!!11' next time you have to strip down and get a hand shoved between your legs. You think our opponent lost? You think we are winning? Go stand in line for the TSA again.

If we are defeated by third world shitbags, what does that make us? :hmm: Think about that next time you'd think something derogatory of them. Think of how we have prostrated ourselves into becoming even lesser creatures. You want something REAL derogatory? Go tell people you're an American.

It could be worse. Go try to fly from Europe back to the US and see what kind of security measures our government has forced on them. It's much more invasive than anything we have here... yet.

 

[Darwin333]

It could be worse. Go try to fly from Europe back to the US and see what kind of security measures our government has forced on them. It's much more invasive than anything we have here... yet.

Do they actually rape your wife in front of you or something over their before you are allowed to fly?

 

[werepossum]

Perhaps the gov't has been buying books from Amazon.

LOL!

I once missed a plane in Charleston because the dozen screeners were running only two metal detectors, and one was tied up with a very elderly lady in a wheelchair. Being made of STEEL, it predictably set off the metal detector every freakin' time they pushed her through it. Same response every time: let's all stand around looking at her for a few minutes, then we'll push it through again and hope it works this time. Being post-9/11, no one was foolish enough to yell "It's a metal chair, dumbasses!"

Had there been an alternate line to have my balls cupped, I'd have made that flight. As it is, I'm looking forward to shaking my junk at them next time I have to fly. "Stare at it, bitch, you know you want to touch it!" Let's see them single me out for "extra screening" after THAT.

 

[Theb]

I heard Al-Qaeda has developed a new explosive that can be concealed in semen, luckily it can be easily detected via a simple taste test.

 

[CycloWizard]

Do they actually rape your wife in front of you or something over their before you are allowed to fly?

Not sure - I left mine at home. After going through all of the crap at the security checkpoint, I was frisked again (very, very thoroughly) and my carry-on bags were completely emptied. This was only for flights inbound to the US though - not flights within or to Europe. I asked the guys at Heathrow and they said it was new regulations by the US for all inbound flights. They weren't impressed that I didn't have to do the same thing flying there from the US. But hey, we're still The Land of the Free and all that, right?

 

[drebo]

Not sure - I left mine at home. After going through all of the crap at the security checkpoint, I was frisked again (very, very thoroughly) and my carry-on bags were completely emptied. This was only for flights inbound to the US though - not flights within or to Europe. I asked the guys at Heathrow and they said it was new regulations by the US for all inbound flights. They weren't impressed that I didn't have to do the same thing flying there from the US. But hey, we're still The Land of the Free and all that, right?

When was this? When I flew back to the US from Brazil in 2006, there was none of that. A handful of our group of 40+ had their checked bags opened by Brazilian security to make sure we weren't smuggling stuff out of the country, but the people on the other side didn't do shit.

That said, I am absolutely appauled that people think sexual harassment is an acceptable security measure. If someone tried to touch me, my wife, or any of my children AT ALL, they would find themselves with face full of whatever hard, metal object was in grabbing distance.

This is yet more evidence that the terrorists have already won. That we would give up our freedoms for the illusion of security is deplorable. I, for one, will not stand for it.

Stick a National Guardsman every 50 feet in airports with a loaded assault rifle. Use profiling to examine only those who are likely to cause a risk. You know, like the guy with a Yemen passport travelling alone on a one-way ticket. Sticking your hand down the pants of a 70 year old man travelling with his 65 year old wife, or up the skirt of an 8 year old girl travelling with her parents and siblings, is just plain stupid and should not, in any way, ever be acceptable. Taking pictures that remove the clothing from sight is no better.

 

[DominionSeraph]

ITT: A whole lotta insecure people.

I've done pat-downs. Guess what? Your balls are nothin' special. And they get paid no mind, either.
If you've lost your keys in the couch and you've got your hands down in there fishing for them... are you paying any attention to what the cushions feel like? No, you're looking for keys, not couch. so your brain does you a favor and filters out the background noise.
Same goes when you're patting someone down. You're feeling for things that should not be there -- lumps, hard edges. The feel of clothing and fleshy bits is filtered out.
There's no similarity whatsoever to sexual groping.

So don't be such pansies about it.

 

[dawp]

there is appearently a movement to protest the searches and to overload the screeners with opt-outs. I'm glad I don't need to fly as often as I used to. haven't flown in years. I'd rather drive than to subject myself these screenings.

http://www.wired.com/threatlevel/2010/11/national-opt-out/

 

[Jaskalas]

ITT: A whole lotta insecure people.

I've done pat-downs. Guess what? Your balls are nothin' special. And they get paid no mind, either.

Says the attacker to the rape victim 'Hey baby, I'm just going through the motions, you're nothing special.'.

 

[Skitzer]

I've got no problems with the pat downs .......................
As long as a nice looking female TSA agent does it

 

[mizzou]

it's all useless unless it's consistent across the board, which it is not

 

[CycloWizard]

When was this? When I flew back to the US from Brazil in 2006, there was none of that. A handful of our group of 40+ had their checked bags opened by Brazilian security to make sure we weren't smuggling stuff out of the country, but the people on the other side didn't do shit.

It was this year after the failed "Underwear Bombing" incident. That's all the justification they need to cop a feel now. Every incident is now used as justification for a new infringement on the rights of everyone who flies.

 

[CycloWizard]

The good news is that all of this insanity is finally producing some backlash. Whether or not it will ever amount to any substantial change probably depends on how much noise is made, but it's always easier for government to seize power from citizens than for the citizens to take it back. Time will tell.

http://edition.cnn.com/2010/TRAVEL/11/12/travel.screening/index.html?hpt=T2

I especially thought this was well said in the article:

"It's the day ordinary citizens stand up for their rights, stand up for liberty, and protest the federal government's desire to virtually strip us naked or submit to an "enhanced pat-down" that touches people's breasts and genitals. You should never have to explain to your children, 'Remember that no stranger can touch or see your private area, unless it's a government employee, then it's OK.' "

 

[Bowfinger]

It was this year after the failed "Underwear Bombing" incident. That's all the justification they need to cop a feel now. Every incident is now used as justification for a new infringement on the rights of everyone who flies.

It must have been temporary, or maybe you're on a list of some sort. We returned to the U.S. through Heathrow a couple of months ago and got LESS screening than we do at home. For example, Heathrow screeners said we had to remove shoes only on request. They just did the normal bag x-ray and magnetometer walk-through. They didn't open any of our bags.