Suspected Bulimic in the house....need advice

[radiocore]

I believe that one of my roommates is suffering from bulimia. She never eats anything when everyone else is...she hides food from us and locks herself in her room with the 'hidden' food and whenever i do see her eat, she immediately goes to the bathroom...early in the morning i can hear her vomitting and my other roommates have noticed vomit in the bathroom. I've never had this situation come up in my life so i'm not sure what the proper course of action is.

anyone out there that has gone through this or has helped a friend in the past, please give me some advice on what to do!

 

[Balt]

I think all you can really do is confront her and encourage her to get counseling. Support her if she does decide to go through counseling, but try to help her in whatever way you can.

I don't have any experience in this area, but I don't think you can do much more than that. You obviously can't force her to do anything, and I guess it's up to you whether or not to involve her parents (which could cause quite a lot of conflict).

 

[kassy]

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[ArkAoss]

GET AHOLD OF ISLA IMEDIATLY!!! SHES GOOD WITH STUFF LIKE THAT@!!!

 

[radiocore]

its a little more difficult than that. I'm actually in london right now and will be going back to the states in about 3 weeks. She's from spain and i don't know her family or friends there. Just the other 2 girls who are also living in the house with house are her closer friends from spain.

but we all have bonded in the past 2 months that i really worry about this situation. even in the best case scenario, i will not be able to watch her actions after 3 weeks. perhaps i should try and contact her family in spain. but is it really my place to do so? its a big mess rite now, but i've hinted to her that i know. But then again, i could be wrong...i hope i'm wrong. =(

please, anyone who has had previous exp. in this area, pm or reply here...i will check this regularly

 

[kassy]

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[Azraele]

I would contact her family. With you leaving in 3 weeks, and if no one else does something, she will continue her actions and hurt herself. You might also sit her down for a good heart to heart. Get her some help, and if you're wrong, "whew!", but there's no shame in being wrong about something like this. You care, and that's what's important.

 

[Isla]

Uh oh.

She has no idea that what she is doing is slowly killing her.

For me, it was about being 'perfect' and hating anything about myself that did not fit my ideal. I am still pretty harsh with myself, but I have learned to love myself more, imperfections included. In fact, I have learned that there is a glorious freedom in learning to accept yourself, warts and all.

It's hard to say exactly what motivates her, because everyone is different.

Whatever is driving her, it will kill her eventually, so you are right to be concerned.

I'm out of time, but I'll BBL, or you can PM me.

 

[radiocore]

I think that the next time I catch her purging herself, i will confront her about it, i'm hoping that it doesn't get outta hand and that she won't just avoid me or just be 'more' careful for the next 3 weeks til i leave and then pick up on her old habits. =(

 

[Isla]

First, print out all the info you can find on what bulemia does to the body.

Believe me, she does not want to ruin her teeth or deplete her body of potassium, so show her the damage she is doing!

Second, she needs to find a positive way to deal with stress. I learned to go for a daily jog, and that has made a BIG difference.

Third, she needs to realize that there will be times when she will relapse.

The last time I relapsed was when I was 8 months pregnant and trying really hard to be a good (sexually) wife, but a certain someone managed to totally depress and discourage me by leaving a frickin slide show of naked 20 year olds (who have obviously never had babies) on the PC for me to see. God I was pissed off and hurt... and I had a temporary relapse for about a week.

It wasn't even that he was wanking to what looked better to him, it was that I was trying so dang hard to love and accept myself at that stage but got slapped in the face with something I did NOT need to see. He could have hidden it better... All I did was turn on the computer and it was right in front of my face. Anyway, I got a grip on it, but it still hurts a little, obviously.

My point? She has a LIFETIME of trying to stay sane and balanced, so she better start practicing now.

 

[sweetrobin]

Hey have you ever heard of the Barbi twins? they have a book about what their eating disorders did to them and how it almost killed them ... if you can find the book it might really help your friend ... eating disorders are a horrible way to die ... I will pray for your friend ... and Isla .. I'm so sorry that your stupid husband did that to you.. I would kill e_mc_2 if he did that.. hehe ... I'm hormonal enough not being pregnant to think of it .. I know if I had raging pregnancy hormones goin on too I would probably follow through with it ... luckily he would never do that ... plus we have our own seperate computers .. so thats a plus too ... he dont mess around mine except if it needs fixing which is frequently .. and I dont mess with his ... it works good that way ..

 

[compuwiz1]

Bulimics and Anorexics are treated in the same facilities as Alcoholics, Drug Addicts and Compulsive Gamblers. Why? The underlying core emotional issues are very similar. This is a person in need of professional help. Practicing Bulimics and Anorexics have very short lifespans! Needless to say, this is a very serious issue.
A person must want help before they seek help, some won't until it's too late.

 

[Isla]

It's true, compuwhiz. My daily exercise is something I must have... the release of endorphins IS my addiction now. I have incredible moodswings unless I stay balanced through proper nutrition and regular exercise. I do think it is chemical in my case.... manic depression (bipolar disorder) runs in my family.

lol, sweetrobin, thanks for the sympathy. I should have been more angry, but I was just totally crushed. Men.... oh well. Maybe I should look into a computer just for me!

 

[compuwiz1]

Isla, I'm bipolar. Not a good thing. Meds help me.

 

[qacwac]

Good luck radiocore. I have no experience with this so I am not much help. If I were in the situation you are in I would first seek my pastor's guidance. Don't know if you have someone like that.

To Isla: I apologize for the general crappiness of men. Besides everything else about it, I think that was about the stupidiest thing he could have done. I admire your ability to forgive and still love him.

It would sorely disappoint me if my dad did that.

 

[radiocore]

thanks for all the info guys...i've been watching out for her but since I've posted I haven't had to suspect her doing it again...or perhaps she's just hiding it better. But right now I'm talking with her friends and we're all discussing what the best course of action is =)

THanks again all!

 

[DABANSHEE]

Tell her that the only men that really like skinny girls are either subconsciously pedophilic (they like girls theat look pre-pubesent) or subconsciously gay (the less female features the better). Real men actually like soft curves on their girls (unless of course they are so full of soft curves you have to roll them in flour to find the wet spot).

 

[Isla]

Hooray for real men!



(Does this mean I can have a slice of pizza?)

 

[perry]

<< (unless of course they are so full of soft curves you have to roll them in flour to find the wet spot). >>



ROFLMAO. Never heard that one before.