Stupid things your parents have said to you?

[dieselstation]

i got "anybody can do your job. how hard can the internet be?" from my mom today.

 

[littlezipp]

And what did you do to her? What do you do?

 

[dieselstation]

i just walked away. i do web design and tech support and test engineer and server support and technical writer.. basically.. my company has me doing everything.

 

[Stiler]

"are you doing drugs?" from my dad because i bought some incents because i liked the smell of them.

 

[TallBill]

my mom once called me a son of a bitch during a heated argument.;. i just started cracking up

 

[QTPie]

<<my mom once called me a son of a bitch during a heated argument.;. i just started cracking up >>

LOL. It happened to me long time ago, too.

 

[Stealth1024]

lol.... I just thought about that one

 

[ChrisIsBored]

<< my mom once called me a son of a bitch >>

 

[Miramonti]

"are you doing drugs?" from my dad because i bought some incents because i liked the smell of them.

Its pretty common to light incense to cover the smell of weed or something else.

 

[joohang]

<< my mom once called me a son of a bitch during a heated argument.;. i just started cracking up >>

LMAO

 

[ThaGrandCow]

<< my mom once called me a son of a bitch during a heated argument.;. i just started cracking up >>

 

[fr]

<< my mom once called me a son of a bitch during a heated argument.;. i just started cracking up >>

 

[jjones]

<< Stupid things your parents have said to you? >>


"Wake up; it's time to go to church".

 

[propellerhead]

-- "How many times do I have to tell you to [insert parental order here]?"

Many times I was tempted to blurt out some random number.

 

[Tauren]

That I was going to end up in prison getting ass raped.

 

[Jfur]

I have extremely eccentric parents. Some highlights:

age 6 (Mom): You must wash the [male organ] very thoroughly before it is inserted in the mouth (note: she was just "chatting" not instructing me, apparently!)

age 10 (Dad): Go back and watch Empire Strikes Back until you know all the lines by heart (it took 17 viewings that summer -- obviously this was a cheap attempt at babysitting)

age 13 (Mom): Ok, I will lend you the $5. But you have to sign this note saying if you don't pay it back within 30 days you will eat one pound of dog $hit

age 14 (Mom): If you go out dressed like that the police will shoot you!!!!!!

age 15 (Dad): When am I going to get some grandchildren?

all the time (Dad): School numbs the mind and makes you an idiot! -- I am now fighting to keep my younger sister in high school

My favorite parental line was when I was napping on the couch and I heard/saw my Dad put his hands on my brother's shoulders and announce "You are now a man!" -- nothing significant had happened; it was just his 14th birthday. It did not help that I immediately began howling with laughter. To this day, my brother and I can't stop laughing when we think about that!

 

[toant103]

my uncle said this to me, i'm doing 70MPH on the HW. speed limit is 65. slow down, your passing the speed limit.

 

[eakers]

my dad doesnt believe in the law of conservation of energy.

we argue about it allllllll the time.

i cant even express his ridculous drunken arguments against it, its too funny.

*kat. <-- hardcore believer in the law of conservation of energy.

 

[Geekbabe]

"you'll grow out of it"


"how can you make any money playing with a computer ?"

 

[Viper GTS]

My mom has a habit of speaking before thinking, which lends itself to hilarious results. My favorite example?

When I was learning to drive my mom was tired of my quick acceleration off the line. One day she was pissed off at the world, & I was driving. As I pulled out of the driveway she said "Gregg, quit jerking off!"

Viper GTS

 

[DanFungus]

<< my mom once called me a son of a bitch during a heated argument.;. i just started cracking up>>

HAHAHHAHAHA!!! Did she realize what she said? ahhahah

 

[arigato]

My first car was on its last legs, constantly breaking down and no matter what was wrong with it, my parents would always tell me to put some dry gas in the tank.

Car won't start? - put some dry gas in the tank
Breaks went out? - put some dry gas in the tank
Flat tire? - put some dry gas in the tank

Eventually they came around but not after many experiences being broken down on the side of the road.

 

[TuffGirl]

LMAO jfur!!! esp the one at age 6:Q They must've made quite an impression that you remember all the ages. It's a wonder that you seem to be so well adjusted as an adult. Eccentric parents indeed!!

 

[Jfur]

<< LMAO jfur!!! esp the one at age 6:Q They must've made quite an impression that you remember all the ages. It's a wonder that you seem to be so well adjusted as an adult. Eccentric parents indeed!! >>



there are many more where those came from -- but I don't want to get my parents in trouble

 

[NikPreviousAcct]

<< My mom has a habit of speaking before thinking, which lends itself to hilarious results. My favorite example?

When I was learning to drive my mom was tired of my quick acceleration off the line. One day she was pissed off at the world, & I was driving. As I pulled out of the driveway she said "Gregg, quit jerking off!"

Viper GTS >>

You do realize, Gregg, that each time I hear that story or remember it, I LMAO about it? Probably doesn't help to know what your mom would look like and how she would sound saying it.

nik (has inside dirt on Gregg for sale!!!)