<<EVERY civil war book I've read (lots of them, anyway) makes it a point that Lincoln thought very highly of Lee and wanted him to command union armies.>>
This is absolutely true. Before the civil war started Lincoln offered command of the union forces to Lee. He thought it over and decided that his state loyalty(confederate declared) was more important than the nation and very reluctantly turned down the position and signed on as the confederate general. Had Stonewall Jackson (a very brilliant field commander) survived (instead of being killed by idiots on his own side) the war may have ended very differently.
<<thomas l. connelly wrote in a 1969 essay published in Civil War History about how bad lee was with strategic views, he left the western confederacy open to attack, and criticized the general's tactical ability as well. and his political skill. says grant exhibited all these traits, although grant certainly exhibited no political skill when he was president. this was just the article representative of revisionist views of the civil war, so its the only one i've had to read, being a survey course from 1600 to 1900 on military history.>>
Lee didn't have a choice, the south had no money to pay troops, no money to buy equipment and no money to do anything. The war effort was completely supported by volunteers bringing their own weapons (All Lee had to do was feed them, provide basic living accomidations and provide ammunition, in most cases he was unable to even accomplish this). The north had 10x the resources, manpower and industry of the south. Consider this, during the civil war the homestead act was passed and the expansion west took place. The north devoted very little of their total resources to the war like the south did. The north won the civil war through resource deprival. Shermans march (and the culmination of burning atlanta to the ground) was the nail in the coffin, he destroyed everything on his way, killed, raped, pillaged and generally ripped the heart of the south out. Lee never had a chance in a protracted war with the northern states, had the war ended after the first year the south probably would have been declared the winner. Oh I'm rambling, but the point is Lee was a brilliant general without the resources to fight a suppier force in arms, equipment and numbers. Most agriculture based nations wouldn't stand a chance against industrial nations (the situation in north vs. south).