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Statement of Purpose for grad school

slugg

slugg

Diamond Member
NOTE: I'm suffering from extreme writer's block. This is what I wrote so far, as a joke. My friends LOLed, so I thought you might too. I'm applying for an MS in CS (MSCS).

At three years old, I had to sit on my mom’s lap to reach a plastic board covered with buttons. Behind it was a glowing piece of glass, displaying a variety of symbols. After a quick sequence of button strokes, my mom made a little green frog and moving cars appear on the glowing glass as cheerful music played. How was this possible? The only explanation was magic. It was at that moment that I wanted to be a magician.
 
It is actually quite simple. Grad school is a way for students, who cannot function in the working society, to go back into school when they can't get hired. This is generally because they are socially awkward, physically unattractive, or just plain suck at interviews.

They become perpetual students, so they don't have to tell their family they are unemployed...they are just always working towards something.

Now it is also where very smart people go to become MDs and Attorneys.....which one are you?
 
OCGuy said:
It is actually quite simple. Grad school is a way for students, who cannot function in the working society, to go back into school when they can't get hired. This is generally because they are socially awkward, physically unattractive, or just plain suck at interviews.

They become perpetual students, so they don't have to tell their family they are unemployed...they are just always working towards something.

Now it is also where very smart people go to become MDs and Attorneys.....which one are you?
Click to expand...

🙂. I have a master coworker that fits this description well.
 
OCGuy said:
It is actually quite simple. Grad school is a way for students, who cannot function in the working society, to go back into school when they can't get hired. This is generally because they are socially awkward, physically unattractive, or just plain suck at interviews.

They become perpetual students, so they don't have to tell their family they are unemployed...they are just always working towards something.

Now it is also where very smart people go to become MDs and Attorneys.....which one are you?
Click to expand...

I'm kinda a mix between the two... Smart, but I don't want to be an MD or an Attorney. Decently attractive, decent at interviews. I function in the working society on a regular basis, but I never left school to begin with. So does that mean I'm unique, like everyone else?
 
OCGuy said:
It is actually quite simple. Grad school is a way for students, who cannot function in the working society, to go back into school when they can't get hired. This is generally because they are socially awkward, physically unattractive, or just plain suck at interviews.

They become perpetual students, so they don't have to tell their family they are unemployed...they are just always working towards something.

Now it is also where very smart people go to become MDs and Attorneys.....which one are you?
Click to expand...

I'm the perpetual student. From my experience it's really not such a great excuse as you mentioned. People started to look at me differently after the 7th year or so 😀

Edit:
Btw, my statement of purpose for grad school was extremely boring. It was unbelievably plain. I just wrote about what got me interested in going to grad school and why I'm drawn to this particular research area in that department. I guess I added a little bit about what I liked to do in my spare time, but that's about it.
 
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Start is fine, as awkward as it can get. Everyone has their own stories.

Later in your essay, focus on your ultimate goals in life. It's a similar principle as any fellowship or scholarship essay - write about what you intend to do about a current situation in your sector (or the world) and why, they are always interested in reading this portion.
 
OCGuy said:
Now it is also where very smart people go to become MDs and Attorneys.....which one are you?
Click to expand...

That right there is a lol-worthy statement; contrasted with your banal preface, doubly so.

OP, you're on the right track. A MSCS is a nerd through and through (like most graduate degree holders), and you've nailed it with your opener. From there, you should discuss your academic training, then your professional experience if you have any, specific reasons for applying to specific schools, then plans for what you'll do with your degree. Sending the exact same letter to multiple schools is a bad idea.
 
statement of purpose for grad school has to be the most contrived thing ever.

"i want to go to grad school because i don't want to be a lemming worker yet and i think i'll feel better about myself if i learn more"
 
OCGuy said:
Would I be wrong if I guessed that you work for the public?
Click to expand...

I work for the University of Wisconsin. Are you going to move from denigrating everyone with an advanced degree to denigrating people who work for the government in the same thread?

What do you do, beside averaging over 5 posts per day on one internet message board for over a decade?
 
Gigantopithecus said:
I work for the University of Wisconsin. Are you going to move from denigrating everyone with an advanced degree to denigrating people who work for the government in the same thread?

What do you do, beside averaging over 5 posts per day on one internet message board for over a decade?
Click to expand...

In academia, we call this "getting owned."
 
I never had to do a statement of purpose when I got my masters degrees. Both universities were very happy to take my money 😀
 
I don't know if anyone actually read it, but my statement of purpose went like this:

"I did shitty in my first year, but it made me a better student. I didn't know what I wanted to do, but after 2 years of work, I found a purpose and now I want to return to grad school to learn more. I want to better myself and share my knowledge back at work, and share what I've learned at work with my fellow students. Please let me in, I didn't apply anywhere else and don't want to because the process is so mother effing time consuming and expensive. Will do "favours"."

...The first few sentences are true. Just take out all the "I"s.
 
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