Someone I don't know very well smells like poo

[daveymark]

We see each other, and are around each other enough that it's become bothersome. I hold my breath when I walk past him or am around him.

Is it my place to tell him? If so, what is the correct method to handle this without coming across the wrong way?

IMO it's not my place to tell him because he's not a good friend.

If he was a good friend I'd just say "you dumbf*ck, did you forget to wipe? you smell like turd dipped in sh*t. Jesus tits, you fecal encrusted stain, stay the f*ck away from me until you get cleaned up"

That said, if I smelled like that, I'd want everyone to let me know, regardless of how well they knew me.

I'm thinking a well placed note might do the trick. anonymous, yet straightforward. Obviously not laced with the expletives mentioned above, I'd be as professional and above ground as one can be when mentioning the bruised olfactory senses I've experienced.

Wondering what the collective response of ATOT would be

 

[Fern]

Just do your best Cheech impression and say "hey, who farted man?" whenever you're near him

Fern

 

[amddude]

Maybe a gift basket with some hygiene products, left at his desk?

 

[compuwiz1]

Go to human resources and let them deal with the stinky business. File a nasal harassment claim!

 

[michaels]

WOW

 

[ppdes]

Heh, I told someone like that once. Turns out it wasn't a problem wiping, he had some sort of digestive problem that led him to constantly have smelly farts.

 

[daveymark]

Originally posted by: ppdes
Heh, I told someone like that once. Turns out it wasn't a problem wiping, he had some sort of digestive problem that led him to constantly have smelly farts.

there's no way to control that?I'd put a piece of fabric softener in between my undies and my pants if I had that problem.

 

[Jeff7]

Originally posted by: daveymark
If he was a good friend I'd just say "you dumbf*ck, did you forget to wipe? you smell like turd dipped in sh*t. Jesus tits, you fecal encrusted stain, stay the f*ck away from me until you get cleaned up"

Look for a nice Hallmark card, and write that in it. Then get Mr. Hankie to "sign" it.

Originally posted by: daveymark

Originally posted by: ppdes
Heh, I told someone like that once. Turns out it wasn't a problem wiping, he had some sort of digestive problem that led him to constantly have smelly farts.

there's no way to control that?I'd put a piece of fabric softener in between my undies and my pants if I had that problem.

That'd suck if you'd get a girlfriend then.
"Oh, my guy is so great. He farts a lot, but they all smell like a spring beeze from a flowery meadow!"

Then the terrible truth comes out.....so to speak.

 

[rezinn]

Anonymous note. Save him the embarrassment.

 

[tomywishbone]

"Smell ya later." -Nelson

 

[marleymarl]

Ask him if he smells poo. When he says no, lean in and make sniffing motions towards him and then make a disgusted look on your face and say "I gotto go!" and leave and never talk to him again.

 

[imported_Imp]

Write an anonymous note. I knew a few people in highschool that smelled like crap. The WORST one was in band class; we both played bass clarinet and holy crap, you don't know nasty until you have to smell it, take deep breaths and repeat for an hour for a full year. Luckily, some other people (non-pussies) told him outright to "take a shower" and "you stink". Unforunately, he did nothing...

 

[PottedMeat]

Well now you can shit your pants and have a scapegoat.

 

[RichUK]

Make haste and run towards the target, take aim, then slap a post-it-note on his forehead (all the while being inconspicuous, if possible) communicating the following message:- ?Please, for the love of God, wipe your arse after you?ve shat, YOU STINK!!!!111ELEVENTY!?


It?s advisable to make good use of as many exclamation marks, Ones and words to the effect of ?Eleventy' to help express your pressing concerns.

Job done. Let me know how it goes.

 

[FoBoT]

leave a box of Imodium A-D Loperamide Hydrochloride 2 mg Caplets for him

 

[zinfamous]

Originally posted by: PottedMeat
Well now you can shit your pants and have a scapegoat.

i vote go this route. you can now fart all you want--he will always take the blame.

 

[zeruty]

quick and simple.... start carrying a can of lysol... when you see him start spraying his ass with lysol.
he'll get the clue....hopefully

 

[foghorn67]

If you leave him a note, use different handwriting. Try elegant cursive.

 

[montypythizzle]

Maybe he is taking Alli?

 

[zeruty]

Originally posted by: foghorn67
If you leave him a note, use different handwriting. Try elegant cursive.

better yet, cut letters out of magazines like a ransom note

or forge an official memo addressed to every employee, on company letterhead. mention some real or invented hr policy regarding hygiene, add lots of hints to make it OBVIOUS you are talking about him, without actually naming his name. forge the ceo's signature and put a copy on the offender's desk

 

[SlickSnake]

I had a wet fart yesterday, right after I got home from Walfart. But those big box discount stores do that to me. I had to shower and wash out my underware and everything. Dripped clear fart goo right down my leg.

 

[michaels]

I tell you what the smell might be, a stinky belly button. I knew a guy who would stick his finger in his belly button nd waive it around, inturn inducing vomiting.

 

[Jeff7]

Originally posted by: SlickSnake
I had a wet fart yesterday, right after I got home from Walfart. But those big box discount stores do that to me. I had to shower and wash out my underware and everything. Dripped clear fart goo right down my leg.

So is this why you're called "Slick" snake?


EEeeeeewwwww.

 

[Balt]

Originally posted by: SlickSnake
I had a wet fart yesterday, right after I got home from Walfart. But those big box discount stores do that to me. I had to shower and wash out my underware and everything. Dripped clear fart goo right down my leg.

That.... that is disgusting.

 

[seemingly random]

It's good that you want to be sensitive but let HR earn their money. Most of the suggestions could be taken the wrong way - especially the anonymous ones - everyone will be a suspect in his mind. I suggest HR since some people might just tell you to stick it and continue on their smelly ways.