Some unknown facts about MacGyver:

[Goosemaster]

/. by prakslash (681585)

Fact: On the 1st day, God created MACGYVER. On the 2nd day, God created knives and paperclips. On the 3rd day.. MACGYVER created everything else.

Fact: MACGYVER can invent 1000 different things using a ball of yarn and a pair of sunglasses. 999 of these things can kill a man. The remaining thing can kill a planet.

Fact: MACGYVER invented genocide using only blankets and smallpox.

Fact: The only thing that MACGYVER cannot produce with a soda can and an extension cord... is mercy.

Factne time, MACGYVER built a time machine out of an old refrigerator and a pocketwatch, and used it to travel to the ancient paradise of Atlantis. However, while there, he went on a drunken bender with with a magnifying glass and a book of matches. This area is now known as the Sahara.

Fact: Chuck Norris is an android built by MACGYVER in an attempt to find a worthy opponent.

Fact: Some crazy people claim that MACGYVER was just a TV character, played by Richard Dean Anderson. In actuality, Richard Dean Anderson was played by MACGYVER, and the show was a documentary, the events of which REALLY HAPPENED.

And the final Fact: Necessity is the mother of invention but... MACGYVER is the father.

LOFL..hadn't seen these before...:laugh:

 

[Agentbolt]

I'm hoping to extract an algorithm from how bad those were.

 

[SociallyChallenged]

Meh, those are just lame spoofs off of the Chuck Norris jokes. Lame.

 

[Hyperlite]

i lol'd

 

[mooglemania85]

booooooo

 

[hiromizu]

I nearly coughed a laugh.

 

[mjquilly]

7/10

 

[drum]

Originally posted by: SociallyChallenged
Meh, those are just lame spoofs off of the Chuck Norris jokes. Lame.

I think that was pretty obvious from the title of the Thread

 

[SociallyChallenged]

Originally posted by: drum

Originally posted by: SociallyChallenged
Meh, those are just lame spoofs off of the Chuck Norris jokes. Lame.

I think that was pretty obvious from the title of the Thread

Agreed, and I was expecting that. It still doesn't make them funny.

 

[RaDragon]

Originally posted by: Hyperlite
i lol'd

ditto.

 

[aplefka]

Let's be real - Chuck Norris would kick MacGyver's ass.

 

[ultimatebob]

Originally posted by: aplefka
Let's be real - Chuck Norris would kick MacGyver's ass.

He'd have to get past the Terminator robot that MacGyver built out of PlayDoh, 2 by 4's, and an 80's era calculator watch first!

 

[Goosemaster]

Originally posted by: aplefka
Let's be real - Chuck Norris would kick MacGyver's ass.

If it were MacGyver's will...

...and if he took a break from writing thermonuclear test scenarios in Assembler*

*edit: on an Abacus made of the teeth and dead bones of vanquished enemies

 

[Iron Woode]

Chuck Norris > MacGyver

and these are 4 reasons why:

# There are four legal methods of execution in the United States: lethal injection, gas chamber, electric chair and Chuck Norris.

# Earth's emergency defense plan in case of alien invasion is Chuck Norris.

# Chuck Norris stared evil in the face, and it backed down

# Chuck Norris can split the atom. With his bare hands.

 

[JulesMaximus]

Fact: MacGyver sucks

\thread

 

[Fritzo]

Best one: Fact: The only thing that MACGYVER cannot produce with a soda can and an extension cord... is mercy.

 

[Goosemaster]

Originally posted by: JulesMaximus
Fact: MacGyver sucks

\thread

So he give fellatio to the wives of the men he conquers?

damn.

that's pretty fvking bold.

 

[illusion88]

I am wondering why a quadruple lifer can't quote right.

 

[Agentbolt]

Originally posted by: illusion88
I am wondering why a quadruple lifer can't quote right.

Can't quote CORRECTLY.

 

[Fritzo]

Originally posted by: Agentbolt

Originally posted by: illusion88
I am wondering why a quadruple lifer can't quote right.

Can't quote CORRECTLY.

Can't CORRECTLY quote.

 

[Jeeebus]

Chuck Norris would have to break through the hordes of horny middle-aged - retiree women to get to MacGyver. By the third wave, I suspect Chuck Norris would set his kill sights on something else, ending the duel in a draw.

 

[zinfamous]

I saw the thread title, and immediately thought there would now be spoofed Chuck Norris jokes.

...I'm just waiting for Mr Belvedere to get the same treatment....

 

[HN]

Mac almost pistol whipped a racist if not for the mercy of Cuba Gooding, Jr.

 

[pontifex]

Originally posted by: SociallyChallenged
Meh, those are just lame spoofs off of the Chuck Norris jokes. Lame.

yep

 

[EvilYoda]

I thought this thread would be inspired by yesterday's Jeopardy, which had a question about Macguyver.

Did you know that his first name was Angus?