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So my girlfriend is going to see her ex tonight.... *UPDATE 3*
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WarDemon666
Platinum Member
Well, technically, ive already had this talk with her. And ive already explained what she told me
I don't think he gets it. Ppl... just let him make his mistake.
Here's how a good relationship works: Both people love each other and there are no doubts. They do not even think of doing anything that would disrepect the relationship, ie seeing ex when they know they want to get back with them.
How do I know? I JUST recently did it. Plus I had doubts about my love for her.
Trust != giving in and not saying how you feel and ENFORCING IT! This is what you are doing Demon..
He is being a punk. It is low self esteem issues. If this falls apart, he now has no one to blame but himself for not standing up and saying NO!
ATOT we tried... let this dead horse lie. He will learn... the hard way.
Here's how a good relationship works: Both people love each other and there are no doubts. They do not even think of doing anything that would disrepect the relationship, ie seeing ex when they know they want to get back with them.
How do I know? I JUST recently did it. Plus I had doubts about my love for her.
Trust != giving in and not saying how you feel and ENFORCING IT! This is what you are doing Demon..
He is being a punk. It is low self esteem issues. If this falls apart, he now has no one to blame but himself for not standing up and saying NO!
ATOT we tried... let this dead horse lie. He will learn... the hard way.
Talksmartz
Member
I hate to say this......
but here goes.
Evidently this is the first girl you've had sex with.....(if I'm wrong, I would be surprised, but feel free to correct me).....just judging on alot of the comments you've made
Unfortunately we don't live in a pleasant world, and women are scandilous.....Hopefully you don't have to learn your lesson the hard way...
but here goes.
Evidently this is the first girl you've had sex with.....(if I'm wrong, I would be surprised, but feel free to correct me).....just judging on alot of the comments you've made
Unfortunately we don't live in a pleasant world, and women are scandilous.....Hopefully you don't have to learn your lesson the hard way...
Malak
Lifer
I had the same issue with my girlfriend. She didn't have closure with her ex, I told her to talk to him, guess what happened? They got back together, and almost got married AGAIN. Supposedly they broke up and she has closure now, but who knows.
I would confront her about her feelings. Break it off if she can't commit. That's what I had to do. It sucks, but like the old saying goes. If you really love something, you have to let it go and see if it comes back. I still think my ex is coming back.
I would confront her about her feelings. Break it off if she can't commit. That's what I had to do. It sucks, but like the old saying goes. If you really love something, you have to let it go and see if it comes back. I still think my ex is coming back.
Talksmartz
Member
I agree entirely (well spoken)
But this thread is helping me through my day at work (2.5 hours to go)
SynthDude2001
Lifer
The poster above who said "let him make his mistake" basically nailed it down. He probably came in here for reassurance, which he didn't get, so just let time pass and wait for the next YAGT tomorrow. 😛
xospec1alk
Diamond Member
wait, i don't see what the problem is hehe
I've read the whole thread already, but I may have missed it. I understand she forgave him, but what does she get out of this? Why does she want to be friends with a person that doesn't respect others, nevertheless her? Did you ask what that guy was thinking when it happened last time? I mean, did she give him signals, if not, there is something seriously wrong with him. Maybe you should be worried, but so should you gf.
Totally agree. Its sad but true.
EDIT: Oh yeah, so what happens if nothing does happen tonight? Are you going to worry everytime she sees him from now on? If you let her do it this time, how are you going to ask her to stop later on unless you admit that you had negative feelings in the past and didn't tell her. Relationships are built on truth. Just giving you another point incase you didn't think this far down the line.
Word. It's just not sinking in for the poor guy. Some people just need to learn from their own mistakes and experiences. We should just leave the guy alone, he may be a tad naieve but it seems like he had his mind made up from the get-go not to do anything about this thing he finds bothersome and just wanted someone to tell him not to worry about it. Like I said before, He has to live his own life. Good luck to the OP.
WarDemon666
Platinum Member
You know what, when she gets home tonight, im going to talk to her, and tell her how much I really dont wan't him coming tonight. On top of that, I called up my parents, and turns out I don't have a computer to fix this weekend, it will be for next. So I have no reason to go down... I think Ill stay here. Ill tell her if he wants to come he can come, but I'm staying here.
Whoa. I feel good now.
Talksmartz
Member
ATOT effect?
good decision, don't lose your trust with her man, but keep an eye on it.
keep us updated. (Its like an AT soap. I'm hooked)
good decision, don't lose your trust with her man, but keep an eye on it.
keep us updated. (Its like an AT soap. I'm hooked)
meltdown75
Lifer
There you go. :thumbsup: now you're all set to send him packin' if and when he does show up. If he persists on coming over and you are powerless to stop it (BS), wonder aloud how dry the singles scene must be if he is there with the two of you when he could be out looking for a new S/O. Feel free to comment on how sad it is that he is clinging onto something that has been dead & gone since you came around. If you ask me, you have now have a license to be as rude to this guy as you see fit.
PS: I still think you should dump her anyway. LOL
WarDemon666
Platinum Member
I will not be rude to him. I will just tell my girlfriend that I am not comfortable with him seeing her again, after what he did. Im sure she will understand
Talksmartz
Member
How often are you in the habbit of 'allowing' this?
(just a question)
meltdown75
Lifer
So tomorrow's YAGT will be:
"I told my g/f that I didn't like her seeing her ex and she freaked out on me! What should I do?"
Is there a stern bone in your body, or are you begging to get pwnd by this girl?
"My way or the highway" - you don't have to be a cocky prick to adopt a little bit of this attitude. I say flat out tell her that you don't want her seeing him, not that you're "not comfy" with it. Come on bro! Ok I'm done. 🙂
WarDemon666
Platinum Member
Its the second time.. and god! I already stated that I chose a wrong word.... leave me alone about it 😱
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