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So my girlfriend is going to see her ex tonight.... *UPDATE 3*

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Originally posted by: WarDemon666
Originally posted by: Talksmartz
Just one request. It appears everyone knows what is going to happen tonight. I'm sure alot have had it happen before.
(queue porno music)

And you are unwilling to a) call it off with her, or b) tell her you don't want him over there.
So either tell her you're going to your parents, and then swing by unexpetedly after the kids she's babysitting have gone to sleep, or just wait and see what she 'says' happened.

But either way, give us a post in the morning and fill us in.

Im not a 'spy' She wont apprechiate me dropping by, besides, my parents house is an hour away...

I think im just going to let it go. I trust her, and I know nothing will happen. Ill invite a few friends over to my house, well have a few drinks, play some games, and all will be done with 🙂

....

Sure, take the blue pill.
 
Originally posted by: jdub1107
Originally posted by: WarDemon666
Originally posted by: Orsorum
Dump her. 🙂 Had this happen before and she cheated on me, should've dumped her earlier.

This is different though. I can trust my girlfriend, we are so close, I mean, really close. We tell each other everything.. I can trust her, and I know nothing will happen tonight... Its just the feeling of her spending time with her ex when im not there... it upsets me...

About them being alone, my gf is babysitting tonight, so there will be kids in the house, that may wake up.. so dunno...

I don't know what to do... So my people are saying to dump her, but theres no way I could do that, I care way to much about her, honestly, I think she is pretty much, well, in my eyes, perfect. May be farfetched for something in this thread, but, we always get along, and we communicate well.. Not once have I thought of dumping her.. I only feel like kicking that guys as$...

If you communicate well ask her why she is seeing him after the last time. Don't take just because or she's forgiven him as an answer. What does she want out of their relationship? Were they friends for a long while before they got together? Tell her how you feel. It doesn't seem you are communicating with her as well as you may think you are. I'd be interested in what she has to say.

Well, technically, ive already had this talk with her. And ive already explained what she told me
 
I don't think he gets it. Ppl... just let him make his mistake.

Here's how a good relationship works: Both people love each other and there are no doubts. They do not even think of doing anything that would disrepect the relationship, ie seeing ex when they know they want to get back with them.

How do I know? I JUST recently did it. Plus I had doubts about my love for her.

Trust != giving in and not saying how you feel and ENFORCING IT! This is what you are doing Demon..

He is being a punk. It is low self esteem issues. If this falls apart, he now has no one to blame but himself for not standing up and saying NO!

ATOT we tried... let this dead horse lie. He will learn... the hard way.
 
I hate to say this......
but here goes.

Evidently this is the first girl you've had sex with.....(if I'm wrong, I would be surprised, but feel free to correct me).....just judging on alot of the comments you've made
Unfortunately we don't live in a pleasant world, and women are scandilous.....Hopefully you don't have to learn your lesson the hard way...
 
I had the same issue with my girlfriend. She didn't have closure with her ex, I told her to talk to him, guess what happened? They got back together, and almost got married AGAIN. Supposedly they broke up and she has closure now, but who knows.

I would confront her about her feelings. Break it off if she can't commit. That's what I had to do. It sucks, but like the old saying goes. If you really love something, you have to let it go and see if it comes back. I still think my ex is coming back.
 
Originally posted by: WooDaddy
I don't think he gets it. Ppl... just let him make his mistake.

Here's how a good relationship works: Both people love each other and there are no doubts. They do not even think of doing anything that would disrepect the relationship, ie seeing ex when they know they want to get back with them.

How do I know? I JUST recently did it. Plus I had doubts about my love for her.

Trust != giving in and not saying how you feel and ENFORCING IT! This is what you are doing Demon..

He is being a punk. It is low self esteem issues. If this falls apart, he now has no one to blame but himself for not standing up and saying NO!

ATOT we tried... let this dead horse lie. He will learn... the hard way.


I agree entirely (well spoken)
But this thread is helping me through my day at work (2.5 hours to go)
 
The poster above who said "let him make his mistake" basically nailed it down. He probably came in here for reassurance, which he didn't get, so just let time pass and wait for the next YAGT tomorrow. 😛
 
Originally posted by: WarDemon666
Originally posted by: jdub1107
Originally posted by: WarDemon666
Originally posted by: Orsorum
Dump her. 🙂 Had this happen before and she cheated on me, should've dumped her earlier.

This is different though. I can trust my girlfriend, we are so close, I mean, really close. We tell each other everything.. I can trust her, and I know nothing will happen tonight... Its just the feeling of her spending time with her ex when im not there... it upsets me...

About them being alone, my gf is babysitting tonight, so there will be kids in the house, that may wake up.. so dunno...

I don't know what to do... So my people are saying to dump her, but theres no way I could do that, I care way to much about her, honestly, I think she is pretty much, well, in my eyes, perfect. May be farfetched for something in this thread, but, we always get along, and we communicate well.. Not once have I thought of dumping her.. I only feel like kicking that guys as$...

If you communicate well ask her why she is seeing him after the last time. Don't take just because or she's forgiven him as an answer. What does she want out of their relationship? Were they friends for a long while before they got together? Tell her how you feel. It doesn't seem you are communicating with her as well as you may think you are. I'd be interested in what she has to say.

Well, technically, ive already had this talk with her. And ive already explained what she told me

I've read the whole thread already, but I may have missed it. I understand she forgave him, but what does she get out of this? Why does she want to be friends with a person that doesn't respect others, nevertheless her? Did you ask what that guy was thinking when it happened last time? I mean, did she give him signals, if not, there is something seriously wrong with him. Maybe you should be worried, but so should you gf.
 
Originally posted by: Talksmartz
I hate to say this......
but here goes.

Evidently this is the first girl you've had sex with.....(if I'm wrong, I would be surprised, but feel free to correct me).....just judging on alot of the comments you've made
Unfortunately we don't live in a pleasant world, and women are scandilous.....Hopefully you don't have to learn your lesson the hard way...

Totally agree. Its sad but true.

EDIT: Oh yeah, so what happens if nothing does happen tonight? Are you going to worry everytime she sees him from now on? If you let her do it this time, how are you going to ask her to stop later on unless you admit that you had negative feelings in the past and didn't tell her. Relationships are built on truth. Just giving you another point incase you didn't think this far down the line.
 
Originally posted by: Talksmartz
Originally posted by: WooDaddy
I don't think he gets it. Ppl... just let him make his mistake.

Here's how a good relationship works: Both people love each other and there are no doubts. They do not even think of doing anything that would disrepect the relationship, ie seeing ex when they know they want to get back with them.

How do I know? I JUST recently did it. Plus I had doubts about my love for her.

Trust != giving in and not saying how you feel and ENFORCING IT! This is what you are doing Demon..

He is being a punk. It is low self esteem issues. If this falls apart, he now has no one to blame but himself for not standing up and saying NO!

ATOT we tried... let this dead horse lie. He will learn... the hard way.


I agree entirely (well spoken)
But this thread is helping me through my day at work (2.5 hours to go)


Word. It's just not sinking in for the poor guy. Some people just need to learn from their own mistakes and experiences. We should just leave the guy alone, he may be a tad naieve but it seems like he had his mind made up from the get-go not to do anything about this thing he finds bothersome and just wanted someone to tell him not to worry about it. Like I said before, He has to live his own life. Good luck to the OP.
 
Originally posted by: jdub1107
Originally posted by: Talksmartz
I hate to say this......
but here goes.

Evidently this is the first girl you've had sex with.....(if I'm wrong, I would be surprised, but feel free to correct me).....just judging on alot of the comments you've made
Unfortunately we don't live in a pleasant world, and women are scandilous.....Hopefully you don't have to learn your lesson the hard way...

Totally agree. Its sad but true.

EDIT: Oh yeah, so what happens if nothing does happen tonight? Are you going to worry everytime she sees him from now on? If you let her do it this time, how are you going to ask her to stop later on unless you admit that you had negative feelings in the past and didn't tell her. Relationships are built on truth. Just giving you another point incase you didn't think this far down the line.

You know what, when she gets home tonight, im going to talk to her, and tell her how much I really dont wan't him coming tonight. On top of that, I called up my parents, and turns out I don't have a computer to fix this weekend, it will be for next. So I have no reason to go down... I think Ill stay here. Ill tell her if he wants to come he can come, but I'm staying here.

Whoa. I feel good now.
 
ATOT effect?

good decision, don't lose your trust with her man, but keep an eye on it.
keep us updated. (Its like an AT soap. I'm hooked)
 
Originally posted by: WarDemon666

You know what, when she gets home tonight, im going to talk to her, and tell her how much I really dont wan't him coming tonight. On top of that, I called up my parents, and turns out I don't have a computer to fix this weekend, it will be for next. So I have no reason to go down... I think Ill stay here. Ill tell her if he wants to come he can come, but I'm staying here.

Whoa. I feel good now.

There you go. :thumbsup: now you're all set to send him packin' if and when he does show up. If he persists on coming over and you are powerless to stop it (BS), wonder aloud how dry the singles scene must be if he is there with the two of you when he could be out looking for a new S/O. Feel free to comment on how sad it is that he is clinging onto something that has been dead & gone since you came around. If you ask me, you have now have a license to be as rude to this guy as you see fit.

PS: I still think you should dump her anyway. LOL
 
You know what, when she gets home tonight, im going to talk to her, and tell her how much I really dont wan't him coming tonight. On top of that, I called up my parents, and turns out I don't have a computer to fix this weekend, it will be for next. So I have no reason to go down... I think Ill stay here. Ill tell her if he wants to come he can come, but I'm staying here.

Whoa. I feel good now.

Glad it worked out for you. I do hope your talk goes well too.
 
Originally posted by: Electric Amish
they are still "friends" and im allowing her to see him....

So, you're "allowing" her to see him? WTF? Are you her father or something?

That statement makes me think she should dump you. Why would she want to live her life with a controlling asshole?


I agree in this day and age you don't "allow" a person to do anything unless you are getting a procto exam.

Ausm
 
Originally posted by: meltdown75
Originally posted by: WarDemon666

You know what, when she gets home tonight, im going to talk to her, and tell her how much I really dont wan't him coming tonight. On top of that, I called up my parents, and turns out I don't have a computer to fix this weekend, it will be for next. So I have no reason to go down... I think Ill stay here. Ill tell her if he wants to come he can come, but I'm staying here.

Whoa. I feel good now.

There you go. :thumbsup: now you're all set to send him packin' if and when he does show up. If he persists on coming over and you are powerless to stop it (BS), wonder aloud how dry the singles scene must be if he is there with the two of you when he could be out looking for a new S/O. Feel free to comment on how sad it is that he is clinging onto something that has been dead & gone since you came around. If you ask me, you have now have a license to be as rude to this guy as you see fit.

PS: I still think you should dump her anyway. LOL

I will not be rude to him. I will just tell my girlfriend that I am not comfortable with him seeing her again, after what he did. Im sure she will understand
 
Originally posted by: Ausm
Originally posted by: Electric Amish
they are still "friends" and im allowing her to see him....

So, you're "allowing" her to see him? WTF? Are you her father or something?

That statement makes me think she should dump you. Why would she want to live her life with a controlling asshole?


I agree in this day and age you don't "allow" a person to do anything unless you are getting a procto exam.

Ausm

How often are you in the habbit of 'allowing' this?
(just a question)
 
Originally posted by: WarDemon666
I will not be rude to him. I will just tell my girlfriend that I am not comfortable with him seeing her again, after what he did. Im sure she will understand
So tomorrow's YAGT will be:

"I told my g/f that I didn't like her seeing her ex and she freaked out on me! What should I do?"

Is there a stern bone in your body, or are you begging to get pwnd by this girl?

"My way or the highway" - you don't have to be a cocky prick to adopt a little bit of this attitude. I say flat out tell her that you don't want her seeing him, not that you're "not comfy" with it. Come on bro! Ok I'm done. 🙂
 
Originally posted by: Talksmartz
Originally posted by: Ausm
Originally posted by: Electric Amish
they are still "friends" and im allowing her to see him....

So, you're "allowing" her to see him? WTF? Are you her father or something?

That statement makes me think she should dump you. Why would she want to live her life with a controlling asshole?


I agree in this day and age you don't "allow" a person to do anything unless you are getting a procto exam.

Ausm

How often are you in the habbit of 'allowing' this?
(just a question)


Its the second time.. and god! I already stated that I chose a wrong word.... leave me alone about it 😱
 
Originally posted by: WarDemon666
Originally posted by: Talksmartz
Originally posted by: Ausm
Originally posted by: Electric Amish
they are still "friends" and im allowing her to see him....

So, you're "allowing" her to see him? WTF? Are you her father or something?

That statement makes me think she should dump you. Why would she want to live her life with a controlling asshole?


I agree in this day and age you don't "allow" a person to do anything unless you are getting a procto exam.

Ausm

How often are you in the habbit of 'allowing' this?
(just a question)


Its the second time.. and god! I already stated that I chose a wrong word.... leave me alone about it 😱

I think he's talking to AUSM
 
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