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So... I'm going to prison tomorrow

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You can't talk about it, so you made a thread saying you can't talk about it? Attention whores are fucking annoying.
 
this thread is worthy of Creed

:music: should have been dead on a sunday mornin
bangin my head
no time for mourning... ain't got no time :music:

and everyone knows how much Creed blows 😛

j/k 😛

OP created his own prison. surprise buttsechs :Q
 
Haha, well played. People love to hate threads like this, but what else is there that truly entertains?
 
:thumbsup: to mill
:thumbsdown: to the fucking idiots complaining about attention whoring yet continue to post and bump the thread.
:thumbsup::thumbsup: to darthvoy for his stories.
 
Originally posted by: Inspector Jihad
:thumbsup: to mill
:thumbsdown: to the fucking idiots complaining about attention whoring yet continue to post and bump the thread.
:thumbsup::thumbsup: to darthvoy for his stories.
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QFT, I get robbed and get accused of attention whoring for posting about it.

90% here have no lives it seems and then get pissed when the other 10% mention their's
 
next time for your class go to a federal penitentiary
http://pics.bbzzdd.com/users/ThePresence/fpmita.jpg

if you ever really go, get some prison training before you go
http://jailtimeconsulting.com/
JT Consulting offers solutions. Solutions to the problems that men and women facing federal incarceration are confronted with. Real life issues affecting their families, their livelihood, and their future. JT Consulting, through its four divisions; JT Services, JT Research, JT Family Support System, and JT One-on-One Consulting, will help you through your dreadful ordeal. You are not alone. Many people have faced doing time in federal prisons. Some were quite famous such as television celebrity Martha Stewart, or Jeffrey Skilling and Andrew Fastow of Enron, or media baron Conrad Black. Another lesser known case involves the famous painter Peter Max who faced 10 years in federal prison and a $500,000.00 fine for tax evasion and conspiracy. He received a sentence of two months of work release, 800 hours of community service and a $30,000.00 fine. What did Peter Max have that you don?t?
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what race gang would an indian guy like me join so i don't get shanked? this piece of missing information is the only thing preventing me from becoming a criminal and ending up in prison.
 
Originally posted by: alkemyst
Originally posted by: Inspector Jihad
:thumbsup: to mill
:thumbsdown: to the fucking idiots complaining about attention whoring yet continue to post and bump the thread.
:thumbsup::thumbsup: to darthvoy for his stories.
Click to expand...

QFT, I get robbed and get accused of attention whoring for posting about it.

90% here have no lives it seems and then get pissed when the other 10% mention their's
Click to expand...
0_0

dudes........ simmer down 0_0

it's only the internet
 
Originally posted by: Inspector Jihad
what race gang would an indian guy like me join so i don't get shanked? this piece of missing information is the only thing preventing me from becoming a criminal and ending up in prison.
Click to expand...

The 7-11's
 
Originally posted by: compman25
Originally posted by: Inspector Jihad
what race gang would an indian guy like me join so i don't get shanked? this piece of missing information is the only thing preventing me from becoming a criminal and ending up in prison.
Click to expand...

The 7-11's
Click to expand...

:laugh:
:laugh:
:laugh:

 
Originally posted by: Darthvoy
Originally posted by: mikej007
These stories you tell are strangely mesmerizing. Any more?
Click to expand...

I made friends with a "helper" (I forgot the correct prison term). A helper is a non-violent inmate who has gained the trust of the deputies. As a result, they get a lot more freedom and they serve the food to the people in the cells. He would always give me extra food. As you can imagine the food was terrible. In the mornings you would get peanut butter, bread, cereal, milk, and an apple. In the afternoon you would get peanut butter, bread, cereal, milk, and an apple. For dinner we got hot food. The hot food was crap too, but in comparison to everything we would get prior to that, it tasted damn good. Sometimes we would get an "orange flavored drink". That's what it actually said on the carton and it reminded me of the "malk" Simpsons episode. After a while I stopped eating the peanut butter because it was crap and I swear it came out undigested. So, I always traded it for a fruit or juice.

I was also the only one who took showers there. I took two daily because they never give you clean clothes.

The whole time I was there, I didn't get much sleep. There was no clock and nothing to read. The only thing I would look forward to was when we got our food because they would let us get out of our cells for about an hour to an hour and half. I figured out when it came close to food time based on the position of the sun and how dark it was outside. We all used the free time we got to trade comical stories. That was pretty much the only form of entertainment we had. I was surprised at the number of people who were there for domestic abuse.

oh, and they always had the AC in full blast. It was so damn cold in the cell that I that I had to use the sheet they give to cover the mattress (it wasn't really a mattress, more like yoga/gym mat) as a blanket.

If you guys want to know anything specific about the "prison life", let me know.

Edit: I was in the Twin Towers Correctional Facility.
Click to expand...

Thanks for saving this thread! :thumbsup:

 
Originally posted by: Darthvoy
Originally posted by: mikej007
These stories you tell are strangely mesmerizing. Any more?
Click to expand...

I made friends with a "helper" (I forgot the correct prison term). A helper is a non-violent inmate who has gained the trust of the deputies. As a result, they get a lot more freedom and they serve the food to the people in the cells. He would always give me extra food. As you can imagine the food was terrible. In the mornings you would get peanut butter, bread, cereal, milk, and an apple. In the afternoon you would get peanut butter, bread, cereal, milk, and an apple. For dinner we got hot food. The hot food was crap too, but in comparison to everything we would get prior to that, it tasted damn good. Sometimes we would get an "orange flavored drink". That's what it actually said on the carton and it reminded me of the "malk" Simpsons episode. After a while I stopped eating the peanut butter because it was crap and I swear it came out undigested. So, I always traded it for a fruit or juice.

I was also the only one who took showers there. I took two daily because they never give you clean clothes.

The whole time I was there, I didn't get much sleep. There was no clock and nothing to read. The only thing I would look forward to was when we got our food because they would let us get out of our cells for about an hour to an hour and half. I figured out when it came close to food time based on the position of the sun and how dark it was outside. We all used the free time we got to trade comical stories. That was pretty much the only form of entertainment we had. I was surprised at the number of people who were there for domestic abuse.

oh, and they always had the AC in full blast. It was so damn cold in the cell that I that I had to use the sheet they give to cover the mattress (it wasn't really a mattress, more like yoga/gym mat) as a blanket.

If you guys want to know anything specific about the "prison life", let me know.

Edit: I was in the Twin Towers Correctional Facility.
Click to expand...

yeah and what exactly does being in a gang entail? you said you just slept in that corner, did you have to help beat down some guys or was it just the same as being on your own except you had a nametag that said you're part of ___ gang.
 
So what did you learn, Mill?

Darthvoy -- Thanks for sharing your stories. That must have really sucked. Were you with guys who had long-term sentences? Did they act any differently than guys with shorter sentences? Thanks again!
 
What Darthvoy forgot to tell you about prison was inside they have punks. Which are men that basically act like women. I would see them in the rec (recreation) yard chatting like women saying no way girlfriend and all that stuff in feminine voices. We had one that would cover up his chest with a towel so you couldn't see his chest like he had tits. They use map colors or kool aid to make makeup for themselves. At night they did stuff for guys in the corner. Where I was we lived in big dorm like cells that had about 25 guys to each section. I woke up one morning like 4am to go to my kitchen job and I saw this guy I had known from high school back in the corner with the "ladies". He was actually a good looking popular guy in school.

Working in the kitchen was the best. In the mornings the inmates got one milk. Working in the kitchen I could drink all the milk I wanted and eat all the pancakes, sausauges, etc.. Keep in mind that they weren't like "free world" (thats what we called the world outside prison) food, it all tasted pretty bad. You are pretty much starving in prison unless you have money on your books(money people send you basically your prison account), work in the kitchen, or your a bad ass well respected fighter in that case you can have people pay you for protection. Payment was either in ramen noodle soups, cigarrettes(which were banned but still used), sweets, stamps to write home, etc...

It was always boring. We played cards alot. They don't let you have real cards(they thought it would stop gambling) we had to make them out of milk cartons. The small kind of paper milk cartons like you got in school. We had cable tv and air conditoning. They gave us that to keep everyone from going crazy. Pretty much for entertainment we would have someone fight every friday night. If you had a problem with someone you could "catch a square" which means lets fight. They had a corner of the dorm that was hard for the guards to see so thats where you would go. It was a rough place. On the concrete every where you went you could see blood stains.

Well maybe that entertained you. I have many prison stories if you'd like more.
 
Originally posted by: Inspector Jihad
what race gang would an indian guy like me join so i don't get shanked? this piece of missing information is the only thing preventing me from becoming a criminal and ending up in prison.
Click to expand...

You have several choices:

CSR's from India that pretend to be Americans with names like Joe and Lora, yet with heavy accents.

Interstate motels operators.

C-stores operators..."thank you, come again"

I don't see what the big deal about going to prison for class/work. You would never been anywhere close to the general population. You are safe unless they decide to take over the prison.

<<--used to go to prison for work related projects.



 
Originally posted by: OILFIELDTRASH
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I don't really find it entertaining as much as I find it fascinating. I've seen a lot of stuff so far in my life, but I've never been to prison and I don't know anyone who has. I've seen those stupid shows on NatGeo about them, but I always like hearing about people's experiences.

Just out of curiosity, do people actually choose to be punks or are they forced into it? I don't know if that question makes sense, but I'll await your reply.

Again, thanks for sharing.
 
Twin Towers? In LA? If so, that is county jail, not prison.


I believe the "helper" term you may be looking for is "mouse."



<-------------- Been in all 3 Orange County facilities.
 
Originally posted by: BeauJangles
Originally posted by: OILFIELDTRASH
Click to expand...

I don't really find it entertaining as much as I find it fascinating. I've seen a lot of stuff so far in my life, but I've never been to prison and I don't know anyone who has. I've seen those stupid shows on NatGeo about them, but I always like hearing about people's experiences.

Just out of curiosity, do people actually choose to be punks or are they forced into it? I don't know if that question makes sense, but I'll await your reply.

Again, thanks for sharing.
Click to expand...

I'd say that 95% of punks do it by choice. The other 5% are just to scared to stand up for themselves so they just become someone's girlfriend. People in prison prey on weak people. They can smell it. For those people joining a gang won't even help. The gang might decide they want sexual favors from them or your gonna wash there underwear. There are alot of twisted people in prison. We had to take a class for bettering our lives. We had a female teacher and you were told to have your hands on your desk at all times. Apparently some guys liked to pleasure themselves right in the middle of class. They taught us basic shit you'd teach in elementary school because most inmates are so dumb. We had a few decent looking female guards and I would see guys just reach down in their pants and start wacking off.
 
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