So, I'm about to become single again...

[CKent]

Good riddance to the leech. Enjoy your newfound freedom and extra money. Those things in your pants are called "balls" - just a heads-up in case you had forgotten.

 

[Pacfanweb]

Been there, done that, paid heavily, at age 30 just like you. Yep, hit the gym, and Vegas sounds like the bomb.

 

[rhatsaruck]

I guess she had been holding it in for a while and it was eating her up inside.

If this is true and your wife initiated the split then thank her.

Me dancing = women laughing

Take dance lessons.

Read this book.

 

[jonny13]

I just got out of a 6 year relationship with my ex. We were going to get married in Sept and one day she said she was sleeping with my best friend from college. That was two months ago and things still aren't great, but it gets easier. I think the biggest change was going home and having no one around except for the cats, so getting out and hanging with friends or coworkers is definitely something you NEED to do. Don't be like a lot of people and sit at home getting depressed and drinking non-stop (drinking while out with friends is just fine though ). It has taken me months just to figure out what to do when I get home after work, but things are definitely already getting better. Another thing I heard from my ex-step dad (strange I know), was to make sure not to avoid all of your favorite places you had with your wife. Get out and go to the same stores, places to eat, etc. Eventually when you pass those places, you don't think of the old memories with her, you think of the last time you were there and had a great steak, or something. Anyway, things will work out for the best....they always do. Sorry for the rambling.

 

[KeithTalent]

It always takes a few glasses of liquid courage to get me out on the dance floor. There is a place near my house that offers lessons; I think I will go check it out.

 

[codeyf]

This sounds bad/vindictive...but...anything/everything she ever complained about you being or not being, change. It doesn't have to be to what the ex wanted, but in the few divorcee's I know, that always ended up being the case. Wether they purposely meant to do so or not.

Did she think you were a lazy computer geek that did nothing all the time?

If yes, then you're already on your way to happiness by starting to hit the gym

 

[KeithTalent]

Originally posted by: jonny13
I just got out of a 6 year relationship with my ex. We were going to get married in Sept and one day she said she was sleeping with my best friend from college. That was two months ago and things still aren't great, but it gets easier. I think the biggest change was going home and having no one around except for the cats, so getting out and hanging with friends or coworkers is definitely something you NEED to do. Don't be like a lot of people and sit at home getting depressed and drinking non-stop (drinking while out with friends is just fine though ). It has taken me months just to figure out what to do when I get home after work, but things are definitely already getting better. Another thing I heard from my ex-step dad (strange I know), was to make sure not to avoid all of your favorite places you had with your wife. Get out and go to the same stores, places to eat, etc. Eventually when you pass those places, you don't think of the old memories with her, you think of the last time you were there and had a great steak, or something. Anyway, things will work out for the best....they always do. Sorry for the rambling.

Great post, thank you :thumbsup:

 

[KeithTalent]

Originally posted by: codeyf
This sounds bad/vindictive...but...anything/everything she ever complained about you being or not being, change. It doesn't have to be to what the ex wanted, but in the few divorcee's I know, that always ended up being the case. Wether they purposely meant to do so or not.

Did she think you were a lazy computer geek that did nothing all the time?
If yes, then you're already on your way to happiness by starting to hit the gym

Sort of, though I did most of the stuff around the house. Also, it is not like she was out setting the world on fire, but I guess her expectations of me were different than those of herself.

 

[Turkish]

good luck dude :beer:

 

[DrPizza]

Good luck. My wife tried that crap once... I said no. Sought marriage counseling. Been happily married since.

 

[Vinfinite]

Originally posted by: KeithTalent
Thanks everyone, some great advice here. I am definitely thinking of a trip, plus I may build that high-end PC I was never allowed to.

Luckily we do not have any kids; makes things a little easier.

don't waste your money on a high-end PC, best thing for you to do right now is go out, stay active, and meet people

anyways, good luck to you buddy

 

[sygyzy]

Originally posted by: Sabot
If you don't go to the gym - start going.

It will make you feel better

Excellent advice. You can get fit and use it as an excuse like "Oh it's ok that I don't go out socially, I have to work out."

 

[Kadarin]

Originally posted by: Baked
Find the mofo who's banging your wife and kill him.

That would give temporary satisfaction until you realize that as much as this guy was banging your wife, your wife was also banging him. That coupled with the fact that such a murder is illegal makes this a somewhat bad solution.

 

[SampSon]

Whatever you do, don't get into another relationship.

 

[astrocase]

Originally posted by: SampSon
Whatever you do, don't get into another relationship.

Ever? :shocked:

 

[KeithTalent]

Originally posted by: DrPizza
Good luck. My wife tried that crap once... I said no. Sought marriage counseling. Been happily married since.

That's great to hear. We went to counseling on Friday but she is to far gone. The counselor recommended individual counseling instead, which I am totally going to do; not sure about her though.

 

[KeithTalent]

Originally posted by: Vinfinite

Originally posted by: KeithTalent
Thanks everyone, some great advice here. I am definitely thinking of a trip, plus I may build that high-end PC I was never allowed to.

Luckily we do not have any kids; makes things a little easier.

don't waste your money on a high-end PC, best thing for you to do right now is go out, stay active, and meet people

anyways, good luck to you buddy

Good point, I'll probably just save the money for a trip instead.

 

[mrrman]

change the locks

 

[spidey07]

Originally posted by: mrrman
change the locks

lol
:Q

But true none the less.
:brokenheart:

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: KeithTalent
After 10 years of living together, been married for 5 of them, she is leaving. Calling it a 'trial separation' but we both know it is over.

I am 30, so most of my adult life I have been with her, now I am just kind of wondering what to do. Anyone have any knowledge they want to share? On June 1st when she's gone, what should I do first, aside from wallowing in self-pity (I'm already doing that)?

I was thinking a trip to Vegas, but all of my friends are married and a lot of them have kids, so to plan something short notice is tough.

Anyway, just looking for some advice/tips & tactics.

Thanks, KT.

don't do anything rash that you'll regret and that may cause... a rash.

 

[KeithTalent]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: KeithTalent
After 10 years of living together, been married for 5 of them, she is leaving. Calling it a 'trial separation' but we both know it is over.

I am 30, so most of my adult life I have been with her, now I am just kind of wondering what to do. Anyone have any knowledge they want to share? On June 1st when she's gone, what should I do first, aside from wallowing in self-pity (I'm already doing that)?

I was thinking a trip to Vegas, but all of my friends are married and a lot of them have kids, so to plan something short notice is tough.

Anyway, just looking for some advice/tips & tactics.

Thanks, KT.

don't do anything rash that you'll regret and that may cause... a rash.

Heh, no worries there, but thanks for the advice nonetheless.

 

[bdww00]

Originally posted by: KeithTalent

Originally posted by: bdww00

Originally posted by: KeithTalent

Originally posted by: bdww00
better hit it! hey u better get some for its gone

Well that is definitely not going to happen.

better try come on dude ur 30 u could work up on some 25 yr old if u havent lost the touchor feel or w.e makes girls go crazy

Oh, I thought you meant with my wife...cuz that ain't happenin'

I think it will take a little while for anything like that to happen, just not ready. I appreciate your enthusiasm though!

it doesnt matter! try to get what you can!

 

[PrinceofWands]

Don't hold it in. If you have the friends or family, talk it out...frequently. Yes they'll get tired of it, but they'll do it...it's what they're for. If not, see a therapist. You should honestly consider seeing one anyway. It's much easier to get through it if you start out doing it than to let it build up and ruin other things and only then go back and deal with it. I'm speaking from personal experience on this one.

Find things to do...work, school, hobbies, etc. Preferably things that are also good for you. Exercise, school, reading, travel, etc.

Peace, and best wishes.

 

[bdww00]

excercise hell yeah ladies love them biker tight suit guys but i doubt if theyed like this body in a biker suit bbut i do bike and someof the ladies still holla

 

[ballmode]

any kids?