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So, are people just dicks to new dads?

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Aharami said:
ok then this begs the question - why are you letting others take pics of your wife breastfeeding and her vag in the first place? Heck, why are others even in the room when your wife is breastfeeding or running around without her panties on?!
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Because I'm not omnipresent.. YET...And they haven't, because I'm an ass who calls them and asks for take downs (like a picture of my wife being medicated and not so photogenic didn't need to be out there, but people are idiots).
 
freedomsbeat212 said:
I really, really enjoy it too. I read constantly and took classes plus will continue to learn more.. I just hate dealing with egos and especially hate unnecessary errands (off to do my MIL's laundry... sigh..) .. And I hate people who are not parent of the year giving me advice then not backing down when I say I'd rather not - the forcing of will is what I *HATE* so much.
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no one can force their will on you without you letting them
 
freedomsbeat212 said:
. I'm just tired of unnecessary battles, from people trying to convince us that nursing is bad and formlua the way to go
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Get those kinds of people away from your family!!!!!!!!!!

Breastfeeding is best, there is no logic behind giving a baby a bottle. If your wife does not have a good support system, she will give up on the breastfeeding to make everyone else happy.

After the baby is born, take time for your family and have as few visitors as possible.
 
bignateyk said:
So is your wife one of the two overweight daughters or the extremely needy one?
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I love my wife very much and know how attractive she is, but she was a chubby kid in a family of very obese people (300+ pounds). I'm a fatty too and love my mom but have a pet peeve - my mom considered over feeding a form of love, I view it as a form of passive aggressive child abuse. Because my mom gave me salisbury steak tv dinners when I was 4 I now have hyper tension and spent a life being overweight and unhealthy. NOW I KNOW IT'S ALL ON ME NOW THAT I'M AN ADULT - don't get all neo-con on me and say I'm a whiner. My current weight is my fault, my criticism is that parents who don't value their child's health aren't necessarily the best parents.
 
JulesMaximus said:
Just stay away from those who cause you grief during this time. I live 90 miles away from my in-laws so thankfully they weren't coming around much after our son was born.
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You could always do what my dad would do - say "we don't have time for a visit" and close the door on them then lock it 😀

People are welcome to visit, but only if they called ahead and got the ok. People who randomly showed up would not get in.
 
freedomsbeat212 said:
Are you married?
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yes, and I get along very well with my in laws. But my MiL can be pushy and I've politely let her know that I wont bend to her will. She has since stopped trying. All you need is one good pushback, but do it politely. If that doesnt work, brush off your shoulders and just start ignoring her advice. If she gets confrontational, politely let her know that with all due respect, your child is yours and you will do what you think is best for your child. Yes people will give advice you dont like, but you have to learn to ignore and not care.
 
You're not alone freedomebeats212. Just resist the urge to punch your M-i-L, and you'll be much better off. lol, but seriously...M-i-L's are all the same, just be patient but stand your ground. it will get better.
 
Jeeebus said:
I'm gonna be honest with you... you come across as a whiny little bitch.

You've had a kid for less than a week. If you can't handle it at this point, you're in for some fun times. And everything you think you're going through, your wife has it 10x rougher (minimum).

Man up and let your kid be the baby in the family.
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Go easy on him, everyone needs a place to let shit out. He's using OT to do it.

OP, first off, congrats on being a dad. It's one of the most frustrating, eye opening and rewarding experiences I've ever had. While I applaud you for wanting to keep up with the house, nothing is more important than getting a good rest while the baby sleeps. Take every chance you can get to rest and break away from daddy duty. As for the people being dicks, fuck 'em. Everyone thinks they know everything, but only you will know how to raise your kid.

Good luck!
 
Jeeebus said:
I'm gonna be honest with you... you come across as a whiny little bitch.

You've had a kid for less than a week. If you can't handle it at this point, you're in for some fun times. And everything you think you're going through, your wife has it 10x rougher (minimum).

Man up and let your kid be the baby in the family.
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The lack of sleep at first fucks with your head...I know both my girlfriend and I were getting pretty delusional the first few weeks because we couldnt sleep for more than 1-2 hours at a time.
 
Well you've been away from work, so I would expect there to be stuff to catch up on when you get back... hence the added load.

The rest is just dealing with mothers around babies, so that seems to be about right too.
 
I feel your pain OP, I don't think I slept more than a couple of hours at a time for the first 2 years after daughter was born.

I'd wake up in the middle of the night and just go look at her. She's still amazing, although she now calls the police when I break into her apt to look at her while she's sleeping... 😵
 
gorcorps said:
The rest is just dealing with mothers around babies, so that seems to be about right too.
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What's ironic is how some women say watching television rots your brain, then they'll talk like retards to a baby and think that isn't causing permanent brain damage.

proper English sentences on TV = rots your brain
ra ra ah ah ah ro ma ro ma ma ga ga ooh la la = proper way to communicate with a baby
 
Slaughter the sister in law, bathe in her blood, and put her head upon a pike. The MIL will get the hint. And by choosing the SIL, well, the MIL will die of old age first, this way you won't have the SIL around longer. :awe:
 
Just shine it on with the relatives, hard to take something back if you get rude.

The important thing is that you and your wife agree on the important stuff, and just nod and smile when others butt in.
 
went thru the same stuff, just gotta stand up n tell eveyone that it's your child.they might mind at first but will get over it.
 
freedomsbeat212 said:
I really, really enjoy it too. I read constantly and took classes plus will continue to learn more.. I just hate dealing with egos and especially hate unnecessary errands (off to do my MIL's laundry... sigh..) .. And I hate people who are not parent of the year giving me advice then not backing down when I say I'd rather not - the forcing of will is what I *HATE* so much.
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i will be slightly blunt here...

Build a bridge and get over it. Why? IT DOES NOT STOP. people think they are helping or giving advice. its not just to the dads but new moms too.

nod your head and say thanks and do what you think is right.

i will i got some great advice from a lady while me and my daughter were eating at taco bell (i think it was anyway) well i was eating my daughter was napping in her carry thing. I was exhausted and beat. the lady (about 45) and I got to talking. she gave me some advice in a not "im right this is what you should do!" way. Her advice was great.
 
LumbergTech said:
The lack of sleep at first fucks with your head...I know both my girlfriend and I were getting pretty delusional the first few weeks because we couldnt sleep for more than 1-2 hours at a time.
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I've got a 4 month old and a 2 year old at home, so I'm well versed in the strains a new baby puts on a person. But Mr. "FUCK YOU" is here acting like 'whoa is me - look at my misery' when it's the same thing that every other [decent] dad needs to put up with, yet trying to garner some kind of sainthood anointment.

It's a baby. It will keep you up at night. Family will piss you off. Boo hoo.
 
PingSpike said:
Have you tried pretending you're not home? It works with Jehovah's Witnesses and my crazy aunt.
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That doesn't give any hints at all. If you do it right, it really does look like you're not home. They'll just come back when you might be home.
The proper thing to do is be home but make it clear you don't want to chill right now.
 
Jeeebus said:
I've got a 4 month old and a 2 year old at home, so I'm well versed in the strains a new baby puts on a person. But Mr. "FUCK YOU" is here acting like 'whoa is me - look at my misery' when it's the same thing that every other [decent] dad needs to put up with, yet trying to garner some kind of sainthood anointment.

It's a baby. It will keep you up at night. Family will piss you off. Boo hoo.
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and he is bitching about. So what? Better here then with family relations wich can get strained over it.


those of us with kids know what he is going through. so wny not bitch? if that upsets you to fucking bad.

damn some here are assholes.
 
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