So "300" is only at 60% on RottenTomatoes.com

[ballmode]

I liked it

 

[zinfamous]

Originally posted by: jdoggg12

Originally posted by: eleison
Man you use the word a$$ alot.. You must like a$$ which there seems to be a lot in this movie!!! I guess its an a$$-triffic epic piece... of a$$-normus proportion. Hopefully, I'll get to see this in the big a$$ screen... but my broke a$$ will probably see in on dvd

Originally posted by: jdoggg12
I just saw a movie that?ll give your eyes boners, make your balls scream and make you poop DVD copies of THE TRANSPORTER. It?s called 300. I don?t know what the title has to do with the movie, but they could?ve called it KITTENS MAKING CANDLES and it?d still rule.

It?s about these 300 Greek dudes who stomp the sugar-coated sh*t out of like a million other dudes. I have a feeling that a lot of high school sports coaches are going to show this film to their teams before they play. Also, gay dudes and divorced women are going to use screen captures for computer wallpaper.

The movie takes place about a million years ago, and it?s sort of like a prequel to SIN CITY. Except way less guns and cars but twice as much skull splitting. If you watch this movie and go into a Taco Bell, and say to the cashier, ?I need some extra sauce packets? guess what? You?re getting twenty sauce packets because your face will punch him in the brain.

I can?t spoil the plot because THANK GOD THERE ISN?T ONE. Just a$$ kicking that kicks a$$ that, while said a$$ is getting kicked, is kicking yet more a$$ that?s hitting someone?s balls with a hammer made of ice but the ice is frozen whiskey.

TWO COOL THINGS ABOUT THE MOVIE AND ONE THING I DIDN?T LIKE:

COOL THING ONE:
HEAVY METAL DURING BATTLE SCENES

Who gives a sh*t if the music isn?t historically correct? LORD OF THE RINGS could?ve used some Journey. This movie has that chu-CHUNG kind of metal that you hear in your head when your shift supervisor at Wetzel?s Pretzel is telling you that you?ll have to stay for clean up and you wish you had a sock filled with quarters in your hand.

COOL THING TWO:
FOES, MINI-BOSSES AND A BIG BOSS

Basically, the Greek dudes are fighting these Persian dudes, but the director, who must have a dick made of three machine guns, does it all like a video game. The Greeks fight every death metal video from the last ten years. There?s wave after wave of giants, freaks, ninjas, mutants, wizards, and a hunchback who looks like he?s got Rosie O?Donnell on his back.

Would I have been happy if Dom DeLuise from HISTORY OF THE WORLD, PART I had shown up? Maybe, but this movie more than makes up for that glaring oversight.

NOT SO GOOD THING:
DUDE NUDITY (?DUDE-ITY?)

These are Greek times, when there were a lot of naked women around. And there are some naked women in this film, but almost every naked woman scene has a muscular dude giving the screen an a$$ picnic. Dude-ity is something directors put in their movies so people will think they?re serious, I guess, and not just throwing in naked hotties.

Any directors reading this ? IT?S OKAY TO JUST THROW IN NAKED HOTTIES.

Can?t someone make a movie about naked Amazons and call it PAUSE BUTTON?

My final analysis is 300 the most a$$-ruling movie I?ve seen this year, and will probably be the King of 2007 unless someone makes a movie where a pair of sentient boobs fights a werewolf.

lol, not my review... i forgot to use quotes

way to plaigiarize, a$$whipe . provide a link before I report you to the morality police.

 

[Brian48]

Geez. All this negativity. Frank Miller and the other producers must really be hurt by all the bad press. I'm sure they're probably crying all the way to the bank right now.

 

[cliftonite]

LOVED the end. Anyone remember the exact quote during the part where he throws his spear at Xerxes? "He took his shield off because the weight cause him to lose his balance...etc Anyone remember that? Was awesome.

 

[masshass81]

Originally posted by: cliftonite
LOVED the end. Anyone remember the exact quote during the part where he throws his spear at Xerxes? "He took his shield off because the weight cause him to lose his balance...etc Anyone remember that? Was awesome.

his helmet was stifling, it also narrowed his vision. His shield was heavy, it caused him to lose his balance. blah blah blah (i forget)... because his target.... was far.. *throws spear of pwnage*

 

[daveymark]

saw it twice so far at imax both times with the free tickets from best buy. I plan on using the remaining 4 tickets I have as well before they expire on april 9. one of the few moviegoing experiences I actually enjoyed.

 

[AnthroAndStargate]

Well the Spartan military did encourage homosexual relations amongst it soldiers. They figured that if you fought along side your lover in the battlefield you would be more apt to fight harder to impress/protect him. So I guess the movie is accurate. That review is hilarious.

 

[UncleWai]

Go Persia!

 

[cKGunslinger]

Originally posted by: CPA
I saw it and loved it, though I didn't care for Xerxes voice. It reminded me of Stargate.

Yeah, it was a bit amplified.

But my take was at the end, you realize the whole thing was pretty much a narration from one of the Spartans, telling the story over and over. The entire purpose of telling his soldiers the story is to inspire them and make the 300 as uber as possible, that's why the elephants were 40ft tall and there were inhuman-looking monsters in the Persian army.

It was a story and it's pretty typical to exaggerate battle stories such as this. That's how I interpreted it, at least - you weren't watching the actual battle at Themo-whatever, you were watching a visual depiction of the story being told. You know, ala "the sea was angry that day, like an old man trying to send back soup at a deli." =P

 

[archiloco]

Originally posted by: masshass81

Originally posted by: cliftonite
LOVED the end. Anyone remember the exact quote during the part where he throws his spear at Xerxes? "He took his shield off because the weight cause him to lose his balance...etc Anyone remember that? Was awesome.

his helmet was stifling, it also narrowed his vision. His shield was heavy, it caused him to lose his balance. blah blah blah (i forget)... because his target.... was far.. *throws spear of pwnage*

but he was not there for that part, i guess some Persian spy told him how the battle ended?? hehe

 

[clamum]

I thought it kicked ass. :thumbsup::thumbsup:

 

[theprodigalrebel]

I loved the visual style and how it injected me with adrenaline after I walked out of the theater. Incredible film-making style.

However...what I didn't quiet get is why I didn't really 'feel' for the soldiers. Y'know, like in Black Hawk Down/Saving Private Ryan where you actually feel sad for the soldiers and their sacrifices - that didn't happen with this movie. But as a a treat for the eyes and ears, this movie does rock! :thumbsup:

 

[iroast]

Originally posted by: theprodigalrebel
I loved the visual style and how it injected me with adrenaline after I walked out of the theater. Incredible film-making style.

However...what I didn't quiet get is why I didn't really 'feel' for the soldiers. Y'know, like in Black Hawk Down/Saving Private Ryan where you actually feel sad for the soldiers and their sacrifices - that didn't happen with this movie. But as a a treat for the eyes and ears, this movie does rock! :thumbsup:

The reason is probably because 300 has an unrealistic feel (demons/cgi/whatever). Also, in SPR/BHD, there's character building. You get to know each soldier.