Should someone earn trust or should they be givin trust until they break it?

dolph

Diamond Member
Jan 18, 2001
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i tend to trust people until they've broken it. but i'm a trusting person. however, it completely depends on the situation.
 

Hitman32

Banned
Feb 23, 2003
160
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Personally, I am kind of untrusting because I have an overall pessimistic view of human nature. So with me trust has to be earned. Definately not given out freely.
 

melly

Diamond Member
Feb 5, 2002
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Originally posted by: dolphi tend to trust people until they've broken it. but i'm a trusting person. however, it completely depends on the situation.

 

bob332

Banned
Jan 25, 2002
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it is just a matter of your own personal life experiences. i personally do not trust anybody, regardless of situation or who they are, unless i would die, then i would trust upfront because it doesn't matter if they let you down, you will die anyway. based on my personal experiences with family and friends, i would not trust anybody up front, they must earn it. unfortunately i am a pessimistic, paranoid, anxious person.
 

iwearnosox

Lifer
Oct 26, 2000
16,018
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Originally posted by: bob332
it is just a matter of your own personal life experiences. i personally do not trust anybody, regardless of situation or who they are, unless i would die, then i would trust upfront because it doesn't matter if they let you down, you will die anyway. based on my personal experiences with family and friends, i would not trust anybody up front, they must earn it. unfortunately i am a pessimistic, paranoid, anxious person.

That's funny. Based on your writing style I'd say that's pretty apparent.
 

notfred

Lifer
Feb 12, 2001
38,241
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There's a certain level of trust that is given out when first meeting a person. If that person is a thug gangster, it's probably around 0. If that person is a nun, it's signifgicantly higher. Throughout your dealings with this person, they have the ability to earn a higher level of trust, or lose your trust and move down the ladder, so to speak. So, in a sense, both.
 

TNTrulez

Banned
Aug 3, 2001
2,804
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Originally posted by: notfred
There's a certain level of trust that is given out when first meeting a person. If that person is a thug gangster, it's probably around 0. If that person is a nun, it's signifgicantly higher. Throughout your dealings with this person, they have the ability to earn a higher level of trust, or lose your trust and move down the ladder, so to speak. So, in a sense, both.

Well you still don't trust someone completely. If a nun you dont' know ask for $$ like 1k would you give it?
 

YetioDoom

Platinum Member
Dec 12, 2001
2,162
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I give a person a certain amount of trust to begin with, and then as the relationship progresses, my trust for them grows.
 

falconx80

Senior member
Jan 23, 2000
332
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i start out neutral, and as their trust with me increases so does my trust with them.

never give them the upper hand cause i know i will be screwed in the end.
 

jjones

Lifer
Oct 9, 2001
15,424
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Life has a way of doling out the unexpected to those that give their trust freely. I trust anyone with those things in life that I do not really care about; with the things I care about I've learned to exercise caution.
 

yowolabi

Diamond Member
Jun 29, 2001
4,183
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81
It's gotta be a combination of the two. When you meet someone, you can't start off by doubting everything they say, and assuming they're lying. It's not practical, will negatively influence how you treat people, and makes you not a fun person to be around. So a certain level of trust should be given until they prove they can't attain it.

However, that level of trust only goes so far. You can take them at their word up until the point that you risk something. So you can take them at their word immediately, but you can't depend on their word immediately. As examples:

If they say their IQ is 150 - trust, They say they'll use their brainpower to write your research paper for you - don't trust.

They ask to borrow a dollar until tomorrow - trust, They ask to borrow $20 till next week - don't trust.

They say they find you attractive - trust, They say they are in love with you and want your children - don't trust.

Real trust only comes with time, shared experiences, someone proving they can be trusted with smaller things and working their way up to larger things. However, a parallel of that is the only way to find if someone is trustworthy is to give them a small amount of trust and see how they use it.
 

snooker

Platinum Member
Apr 13, 2001
2,366
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76
I do not trust people I do not know personally. It isn't that I think they are up to no good, but if a person I didn't know walked up to me and said let me see a dollar I will give it right back, I would not do it. But if I knew the person I would.......