Should I be a homewrecker?

[Deeko]

Originally posted by: SP33Demon
Deeko,

If your woman finds a better man, then don't be surprised when you get the ax... it's Darwinism as its finest, verdad?

I know if I was in a LT relationship, was suddenly unhappy, and someone better stepped in, it's a no brainer... be very wary if you're in a long term relationship at college, they're worse than the NASDAQ on the volatility scale!

Well yea, I'm not saying it will last forever, I'm just saying that my relationship means more to me than some of the earlier posters said college relationships mean....ya know?

 

[Maverick]

just hang out with her and show her how much of a better guy you are than her boyfriend is. Don't directly say that you want to be with her. Act like you don't want it and it will be yours.

 

[Bluefront]

Once you get past being a teen-ager, practically every woman will have a few ex-boyfriends or ex-husbands floating around...get used to it. She will also have current boy-friends, maybe a few boy-friend wanna-bees. You want in the line-up? Be prepared for competition.

If you wait till she's 100% free....you've got a long, frustrating wait. You want it...go for it now.

 

[SP33Demon]

What you have to do is make sure she knows that you think she's "pretty" or "cute" and that you're "interested". Do this by telling her friends, guaranteed it will get back to her! Once the girl decidees to hang out with you and already knows this, it lessens her odds of rejection to close to nil. This will make her feel more "secure" and more "comfortable" b/c she can act more herself and doesn't have to keep her "defensive shield" up b/c she knows that you probably won't reject her.

Other tips are: When asking her out, don't classify it as a "date". This way, in her mind, she's not cheating on her man. Just say, let's go out for fun or just to chill. Technically, if she says yes, both of you will know it's an informal "date", but women like to leave things undefined in case things DO work out with their man (erases their guilty conscience knowing it wasn't a date). Make sure you act casual with her, and smile alot/make her laugh (obvious things). Don't bring the b/f thing, let her bring it up. Most importantly, if you're feelin' the vibe, kiss her at the end of the first date. Even if she pulls away, she knows that you want more than "friends" (trust me, you don't want to be stuck in the friend zone!!!). Of course, this is subjective, you have to go with your instincts here. Either way, go for it. You only live life once!

 

[Descartes]

What ever happened to a little independence in your life?

What's with the incessant need to "be with" someone? It seems so many people always have to "be with" someone; then they get married.

I'm glad I enjoy the single life as I don't have to subscribe to this social game. It is my opinion that a woman on rebound is apocryphal, at best. I refuse to enlist in a relationship with my other's mind oscillating between myself and another; perhaps out of hubris.

 

[Deleted member 4644]

Originally posted by: Descartes
What ever happened to a little independence in your life?

What's with the incessant need to "be with" someone? It seems so many people always have to "be with" someone; then they get married.

I'm glad I enjoy the single life as I don't have to subscribe to this social game. It is my opinion that a woman on rebound is apocryphal, at best. I refuse to enlist in a relationship with my other's mind oscillating between myself and another; perhaps out of hubris.

ROFL

 

[TCPpacket]

don't be a fscking vulture. it's not that fun when you're the bf. i know from personal experience.

 

[HomeBrewerDude]

Have at it, but be warned that you will be the rebound guy so don't expect it to last.


Edit: Also, realize that half the reason she will be with you is so that she can not be with the other guy. Thats not entirely set in stone and may change over time, BUT don't let yourself fall for this girl until you know she is completely and utterly over the last relationship. Otherwise you will find your affections for her unreturned.

 

[BoberFett]

You people that say crap like "How would you like it if somebody did that to your girl" are just pansies who are afraid they'll never meet another girl. If somebody can "take" your girl, she wasn't really "yours" to begin with, was she?

I used quotes to show that I don't really see women as property to be had or taken, unlike these boys who feel that people shouldn't hit on "their" woman.

Get used to it kids, other men are going to hit on your girlfriends/wives and if you've built a solid relationship she won't even think about leaving you. If you're a putz, and some two-bit schmoozer can talk her away from you, then you had nothing.

 

[rahvin]

Originally posted by: BoberFett
You people that say crap like "How would you like it if somebody did that to your girl" are just pansies who are afraid they'll never meet another girl. If somebody can "take" your girl, she wasn't really "yours" to begin with, was she?

I used quotes to show that I don't really see women as property to be had or taken, unlike these boys who feel that people shouldn't hit on "their" woman.

Get used to it kids, other men are going to hit on your girlfriends/wives and if you've built a solid relationship she won't even think about leaving you. If you're a putz, and some two-bit schmoozer can talk her away from you, then you had nothing.

Well said.

 

[SP33Demon]

Yeah, I agree with BoberFett! Oh and just to accentuate this point... the girl I have a date with tonight just dumped her b/f!!! Whoohhooo... somehow I feel partly responsible *snicker**

 

[Gaard]

Originally posted by: baffled2
What? you want to come across like some sort of drooling praying mantis ?

Leave her alone,approach her when she's single for god's sake

I never considered a girl "taken" unless she was married. If I was attracted to a girl, I never hesitated to let her know and ask her if she wanted to go out. If she said no...whether because of a b/f or any other reason...that was cool. And of course it worked the other way also...not only did my g/f(s) get asked out, but I expected it. Why would anyone expect a girl to never be asked out? It never bothered me either. Nor does it bother me today, when my wife gets "hit on". If after she explains that she's married and isn't interested the guy continues his advances, then I get upset.

 

[MercenaryForHire]

Originally posted by: LordSegan
A girl on my dorm floor is on the verge of breaking up with her BF. Ive had a crush on her since the end of last year, but I assumed she didnt have a BF. At the moment, I am feeling pretty cynical about life and people, and Im just wondering... how bad would it be for me to just give her that nudge I know she needs to call it quits with the old guy?

Right.. thanks.

Everyone's missing the point here. D.F.F. - Don't (removed) your Floor. It's just gonna make things really awkward for the rest of the year if things don't work out. If you must "have her", give it time. There's always the chances for friendly goodbye sex, American Pie 2 style.

Just make sure you deadbolt your door first.

- M4H

 

[Alienwho]

That's not a homewrecker. Just do it. There is a way hot girl accross the hall from me that was having problems with her boyfriend from home trying to control her life while she was up here. It took me about a month before she finally broke it up with him and now here I am with her, happy as can be 😀

 

[Siddhartha]

Originally posted by: tm37

Originally posted by: Dr Smooth

Originally posted by: LordSegan
A girl on my dorm floor is on the verge of breaking up with her BF. Ive had a crush on her since the end of last year, but I assumed she didnt have a BF. At the moment, I am feeling pretty cynical about life and people, and Im just wondering... how bad would it be for me to just give her that nudge I know she needs to call it quits with the old guy?

Right.. thanks.

Would you want somebody to try to nudge your girlfriend to break up with you?

ANd if she is willing to leave him for you then she will leave you for someone else.

But then again she isn't married to the guy.

You should think how YOU would feel if some dude did that to you.

Huh?

 

[GoingUp]

Originally posted by: baffled2

Originally posted by: SP33Demon
women are like townhouses: You can rent them until someone buys it. 🙂

LOL,but most peeps here couldn't get past the pre-rental screening if the woman's got even half a brain

LMAO 😀


Just be careful of the shady realitors trying to sell you a property 😉 You don't wanna damage your sports car by parking it in a cheap garage.

 

[Moonbeam]

A girl on my dorm floor is on the verge of breaking up with her BF. (What, you can see the future. What's to distinguish "is on the verge" from "I sure hope she's on the verge") Ive had a crush on her since the end of last year, but I assumed she didnt have a BF. At the moment, I am feeling pretty cynical about life and people, and Im just wondering... how bad would it be for me to just give her that nudge I know she needs to call it quits with the old guy? (Your question rephrased goes something like this. I'm feeling that being ethical is getting in the way of my lust. I want to be free of ethical constraints so I can slop at the trough without guilt.
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"You only live once" so live like a pig. Riiiiiiiiiiight.
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"You people that say crap like "How would you like it if somebody did that to your girl" are just pansies who are afraid they'll never meet another girl."

(Ah yes ,the experienced cynic meets the idealistic youth. The value of your advise is blunted by the derisiveness in which it is delivered. While it is true that there can always be a fear there will never be another lover, that does not entirely negate the value of empathy and a life lived with ethical concern. Virtue is its only reward, but what a reward it is.
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We have displayed before us in this thread a range of attitudes and degrees of emotional maturity. One can only hope that those who have no concern for the damage they can inflict on others lives find women of similar attitude and those who see in love something sacred and sacrosanct find the lovers they deserve.