If you are dead set against a mini-van, how would you feel about a
Ford Flex? I don't think they sell well, so you could probably get a good deal on one from a dealer. You definitely won't see yourself coming or going too often.
Order the optional second row buckets for maximum MIL comfort, while one or both of your kids could sit in the adult-sized and relatively easily accessible third row seats.
You can even get the eco-boost V6, which makes the Flex scoot to 60 in 6.6 seconds, albeit at the expense of gas mileage.
They're a bit pricey, and the styling may turn you off, but the interior quality and fit and finish is second to none.
Overall, the Flex's interior is great, with abundant soft-touch materials and an attractive, upscale design. The spacious layout comfortably affords seven-passenger seating rivaling that of a minivan. Even the third row is accessible and sufficiently scaled for adults. The optional reclining and heated second-row captain's chairs reduce seating capacity to six, but comfort increases. Their ability to slide forward also expands third-row legroom. With either configuration, the standard power-tumbling mechanism for the second row makes getting into the third row a snap. The Flex can hold a maximum of 83 cubic feet of stuff behind the first row. While this may be less voluminous than some minivans and several large crossovers, the Flex's conveniently boxy shape makes the most of what it has.
I've never personally resonated with the "mini-van = castrato" stance of shame thing. If I needed the versatility, I'd get a Honda Odyssey in a second and would never look back.
Even if you can accept the "non-mainstream idea of cool" styling of the Flex, it may be more than you want or need, giving up gas mileage and handling in return.
I'm just throwing this suggestion into the mix.
